Post # 1
My fiancé and I are having a rustic farm wedding and I’m struggling to work out what dress code to put on the invites..
My bridesmaids are wearing formal bridesmaid dresses and the groomsmen are wearing grey suits. I’m wanting it to be relaxed, but still don’t want casual attire! Hoping the men will wear either a suit, or I’d be very happy with suit pants/slacks and a nice shirt.
Im thinking maybe cocktail is too formal.. but also don’t want people to be too casual just because it’s a farm/garden! Hate to be so picky when putting on a dress code, but there’s nothing worse than being under or over dressed as a guest..
Dad thinks smart casual (I think this is too casual)
Mum suggested semi formal
any help would be appreciated!
Post # 2
The only dress code that should appear on invitations is “Black Tie.” Otherwise, you don’t write it.
If you have a wedding website, you can indicate the formality on there.
Post # 3
Second not putting it on your actual invite, unless you have a details card to go with it. Semi-formal is an actual dress code. Smart casual is making one up. Stick to what people know.
Post # 4
Yeah agree. Personally, I think putting a dress code on an invite would come off as weird to me. Only intermediate family, groomsmen and bridesmaids need to worry.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2017 - Outside in Paris
Don’t include a dress code unless it’s black tie. Most people put on their Sunday Best for a wedding.
Post # 6
Maybe for you you think there is nothing worse, but I’m guessing most people are just fine and confident with the choices the make in life. I wear what I like and if I end up being a little overdressed or underdressed – I’m comfortable with who I am and what I am wearing (and both have happened to me) and always look nice.
These are people who have been dressing themselves a long time without any assistance from you or others – I’m sure many of them for longer than you’ve been alive. They can figure out from the style and formality of invitation, time of day, and location how to dress. They will understand they they are being invited to a wedding and not to help harvest the crops. And for those handful of worrywarts who need a little extra hand holding when it comes to dressing themselves, they’ll ask.
Post # 7
you dont need a dress code, agreed. People will judge what to wear based on the venue, time of day, tone of invite etc. On the website you could put something, especially to warn ladies about heels /all terrain venue and people will ask you of they have questions.
Post # 8
Emma2 : I second, third, fourth, etc what eveyone else is saying. You don’t put a dress code on your invitations unless it’s truly Black Tie. You will probably have varying levels of formality, which is fine. Nobody will feel bad unless you make them feel bad.
Post # 9
Emma2 : My weeding was two weeks ago in a barn with an outside ceremony. The girls wore long dresses, guys wore grey suits and everyone else showed up in business casual and sun dresses.
It was fine. No one looked like they had come from the farm.
Post # 10
Just put semi formal on your wedding website if you have one. I know it’s considered against etiquette to write a dress code or whatever, but as a guest I really appreciate knowing this information. I’m never offended when I see a dress code or assume that the hosts think I don’t know how to dress.
Post # 11
Emma2 : disagree with consensus! Nothing drives me crazier than people not putting a dress code on their invitations. I hate second guessing myself as I try to plan, worrying that I’m over or underdressed and I shouldn’t need to scrounge that up on a wedding website that Great Aunt Bernie doesn’t know how to use (most guests do not seem to look at the websites at all). Semiformal sounds fine, or, according to the interwebs, Business or Business Casual should work.
Post # 12
I don’t think cocktail is too formal (I got married at a similar venue, fall wedding last year). I’d put that on your wedding website. Smart casual makes me think of business attire.