Help please Family split because of wedding

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

I am dumbfounded. I can only say I’m sorry you’re going through this. Perhaps this girl was/is more damaged by her early experiences than you knew?  

I don’t know what I’d do, but I’d certainly be hurt. I guess I’d let her know that I’m still there for her, despite her decision to distance herself and that I wish her the best. Perhaps one day she’ll realize what she’s doing. 

Post # 3
Member
710 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

That seems like really strange behavior.  I’m so sorry you have to deal with that! I have no sound advice it kind of sounds like you’ve tried everything I’d suggest. 

Post # 4
Member
16 posts
Newbee

🙁

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by  lauleebon.
Post # 6
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Her behaviour is deeply selfish and unfair and she is likely to regret choosing this path when the novelty wears off.  All you can do is let her know you’re hurting but keep communication open as time will bear this out.  

Post # 7
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

I hate to say this, but I would not bother trying to talk to her.

She knows she hurt you and she doesn’t care. I don’t know why she’s behaving like that, but at the moment it seems to me that she is not interested in explaining herself to you. If she had been concerned about your feelings AT ALL she would have talked to you before she got married and certainly wouldn’t have unfriended you on facebook. She is doing this all on purpose and you pursuing an explanation — as much as you deserve one– will likely only lead to further hurt. 🙁

Post # 9
Member
7216 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

lamor:  What a bitch. No, being your wedding doesn’t give you the right to lie to people and take their money and give nothing in return.

I would write a letter to her, saying that she deceived you and you would like the money back. I doubt you’ll get it back but it’ll let her know how you feel. I would also not respond to any further communication from her unless she gives the money back.

Post # 10
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

I would keep talking to her…. If you can bear it. I’d be slightly concerned that she did something so out of character and she may be quite vulnerable with his family. .. hard to know what’s really going on. Keep making sure she knows it’s unacceptable but it just seems an odd thing to do unless she’s under a lot of pressure from him and his family. Who knows though. 

Post # 11
Member
69 posts
Worker bee

+1 toaussiemum1248:  s advice. I’m sorry she was so rude and selfish! She has no idea of how good you have been to her and I bet she will look back in the future and regret her decision.

Post # 12
Member
916 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

She will regret it, and it’s her pill to swallow when she does.

Is it possible her new husband is… well, all of a sudden controlling?  

Post # 13
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Church

That sounds really really strange … I would be so hurt and quite concerned forher. It is very odd that she would not have a single person from her side of the family. That really sucks and I am so sorry for you.

lamor:  

Post # 14
Member
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

My first thought is that her new husband is very controlling. So I would absolutely not wash my hands of her. She may need you someday even though she won’t admit it right now.

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by  TunaCat29.
Post # 15
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Is it possible that the same mental health issues that plagued her mother are manifesting themselves in her? Early twenties is a common time for issues like that to come up. Just a thought… Have you been able to speak to anyone else in your family who may be around her more often to get their read on the situation and her overall mental health? 

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