Post # 1
Yep. Long story short, we need to pull off a wedding in 6 months. There is a possibility my SO is getting deployed at the beginning of the year. We want to have a barn style wedding while its still halfway warm here. My engagement ring was ordered today and we are going to look at a venue on Saturday for a wedding that will be on a Sunday in September. That’s the only days they had left and I really love this place. Any advice for any of this?! I’m freakin out, man!
Post # 3
You will be fine! When you normally plan a wedding, there is a lull after everything is booked, so you just will have less of one. I planned in 6 months with no problem.
My best advice: once you find something you like, STOP LOOKING. Youl could spend years planning a wedding. Once you find a dress you love, buy it. Don’t waste so much time making your decisions. Follow your gut and you will be fine!
The first thing you should do is look for a dress.
Post # 4
@KJA00: I wish I could offer some advice on how to plan in six months. I don’t really have any for that, I apologise; I know I certainly couldn’t do it.
I am replying, though, because I do have an alternate idea for you to consider. You may love the idea, or, depending on what is important to you, it may also not be an option for you at all. Either way, it is something to consider.
My SO and I need to get married as soon as possible, too, but for us it is for immigration reasons. We don’t want to wait any longer to be together; plus, it is really important that we plan our wedding together as a couple, and the only way to truly do that is with him here. As a result, we will be doing the paperwork at the courthouse when he comes to visit me this spring. It will literally be just my parents there. We will then be planning our wedding together (which, in our opinion, is not the same as a marriage since we view it that the wedding is the celebration of the marriage) at some point next year. It will not just be a reception, but an actual ceremony (not a vow renewal) followed by the reception. We will have friends and family from both sides in attendance.
So yeah, not sure if that is an option for you, but it is a possibility to consider in order to give yourself more time to plan exactly what you want, how you want, with no compromises when he returns.
Post # 5
@LostInWonderland: thanks for the reply. We considered that but since he’s getting deployed, there’s always that chance that he won’t come home. I hate to think that way but its reality. so I want to have my dream wedding with the guy I love just in case we wouldn’t get that real wedding when he got home. Does that make sense? I’m keeping my fingers crossed that they won’t end up going!
@MrsTVLover: this is what I needed to hear! Thanks!!!
Post # 6
TOTALLY do-able. My engagement is 8 months, and definitely could have done it in 6. The hardest part is finding venue/vendor availability, and it sounds like you’re right on that.
What other things are you concerned about? A wedding in 6 months is no problem. Now, you can’t go order a dress that takes 6 – 9 months to come in, but seriously, just about anything can be gotten in 3 months. And tons of stuff you can buy off the rack.
I think a shorter engagement is the way to go, to be honest.
Post # 7
Ohhh, just read the other advice. YES, stop looking is key. And narrow things down quickly, be ruthless. Don’t hem and haw over something for 3 weeks. Make a decision and go with it. If there is something you are feeling indecisive on, delegate it to someone else. Whatever you choose, the wedding will still be fine.
Hmmm, what’s my biggest piece of advice beyond that? I guess #1 is to not forget to prioritize your relationship with your Fiance over the wedding. That sounds stupid, but it is so easy to get caught up in wedding planning that it is easy to kind of leave him in the dust and have him feeling like he had no input. I was surprised what things he wanted input on even though he will still claim he didn’t care about them (but when we went and looked he was picky).
Don’t trust anyone (parents, friends, etc) who say they have no expectations, especially if they are giving you money. EVERYONE has expectations – EVERYONE. And that’s normal. But someone who says they don’t have any just means they haven’t identified them in their head and it will become some controversy later when they realize Oh, they really DO care about X (going dress shopping with you, buffet vs. sit down, open bar, type of officiant, etc – something will come up). Ask lots of questions of those who have a stake in the wedding and listen carefully for what expectations are lurking under the surface. That doesn’t mean you have to FOLLOW them, but it does mean you need to address them either way so the person doesn’t end up butt-hurt.
Post # 8
OP, I think you’ll be fine! We are willingly having a wedding in Oct after our Feb 13 engagement and really the only thing I feel SLIGHTLY pressed for time about is the save the dates (gotta send those within the next month or so) and my dress, which takes 15 weeks to be made. And, the only reason the DRESS is an issue is because I need to lose about 20lbs to feel happy, so now I gotta really hit the gym!
Honestly, I think planning too far in advance would make it a nightmare for me. I’m a huge planner, so if we decided to wait until Oct 2014, I would be stressing myself out about it EVERY DAY. Now i get to be excited and then it’ll be done with and we can start planning our family together (ie- move on with life!)
Above all, remember that this is supposed to be FUN. The minute it becomes a source of depression or serious anxiety or drama is the minute we fly to vegas. Seriously.
Post # 9
@KJA00: don’t worry. this can be done. i planned our wedding in 5 months from out of the country.
stay organized and focused. don’t overthink your decisions. know what you want and like and don’t deviate from the plan. find a great planner and start checking off the to do list. when you see the things that “should be” booked/planned 12 months out, don’t stress, just do them now. don’t get overwhelmed.
there’s a saying, “how do you eat an elephant? one bite at a time”.
Post # 10
you’ll be fine! Just get your major vendors booked and get your dress ASAP!
Post # 11
You can definitely pull off a wedding in six months! I’m doing it. We got engaged on Dec. 27 and have a June 8 wedding date. We’ve already booked our venue, photographer, musician, officiant, hair stylist, floral/decorator, caterer, baker for cakes, DJ and rental company for chairs/tables. I ordered the invitations and thank you cards today. I already have my dress, jewelry and shoes, and the bridesmaids have already ordered their dresses. Additionally, we have planned out every aspect of decor. That was all done in just 2 months!
I think the key is organization. I recommend making a binder with tabs for categories (general, budget, ceremony, reception, caterer, etc.), print off a good timeline guide (I’m using Martha Stewart’s checklist which my sister printed from her website and which lays out six or more months ahead to dos, four to six months ahead to dos, etc.) and then just stay focused. I work long hours, but I just give myself at least a couple of wedding related chores to do each day (today I sent follow-up emails to the transportation company, the baker and ordered invitations). One final thing I’ve done to help with organization is that my sister, mother and I have created two private Pintrest boards. One board is for wedding stuff (where we pin things we like for the wedding) – we pin from companies we like so that we can remember where we found things such as napkins, favor bags, etc. to make it easy when it is time to order them. Our second Pintrest board is for hair and makeup and I’ve pinned the hair and makeup looks I like, as well as the hair accessories I’m considering (so that I can order from those companies when I make up my mind).
Honestly, I was telling someone recently that I would hate to have a long engagement because the more time you have to look at ideas, the more likely you are to want to change your mind about things. You can pull off a beautiful wedding in six months!
Post # 12
“Once you find something, stop looking” is GREAT advice.
We planned our wedding in 5 months, by choice. We just didn’t want to spend forever making decisions. We had no problems whatsoever, and we are in New York, where everything “good” gets snapped up early.
My advice is not to freak out at all. I don’t think we did our planning any differently from other couples; we just didn’t have 6 extra months after we’d planned everything to twiddle our thumbs, wait, and second guess our decisions. 🙂
Post # 13
My best advice – start a spreadsheet of guests, and a budget spreadsheet, and a spreadsheet of all contacts, addresses, home, office, cell, email. Stay organized and you’ll do great!
Post # 14
YOU LADIES ARE AWESOME!!!!!! Thank you thank you thank you for the advice!!! Im feeling way more confident now!!
Post # 15
@KJA00: You totally can do it. I had an ealy Oct wedding. Started looking around in Feb (web sites and magazines), started planning and putting deposits down in March, got engaged in April (lol).
Make a list of all the parts to a wedding (venue, photographer, dress, shoes, food, drink, invitation, envelopes, std,etc), every single part. Then make a list of the top ten things (in no order), then whittle it down to top 5, from that top 3 (put in order of importance). When you start to stress about what the stamps look like, refer back to your list and realize that it’s not even in your top 10, so quit freaking out and use ‘ugly’ stamps.
Keep DIY to a min, unless you really, really love it and have lots of time afterwork. Often times the project didn’t take very long and could be done while watching TV. But it took me hours and hours and many trips to Michaels to figure out what and how I was going to something.