HELP!! Regarding RSVPs and Family inviting extra guests

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
42549 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

MrsBehnke2be:  Generally speaking, it’s not polite to indicate who is not invited.

I have seen previous threads where a couple included a line on the website (not the invitations)

“We are sorry, but we are not able to accomodate extra guests.”

Most couples do end up having to phone some guests who add on other people to the rsvp card. If you have to do that, don’t make excuses, because there are always those people who will come up with a solution to every problem.

Don’t say:

not enough room- “Not to worry, we’ll squeeze them in at our table”

no budget- “Not to worry, I’ll pay for her plate” or ” We’ll share the entree”

Keep it simple “We are sorry, but we are not able to accomodate extra guests”. Repeat as often as necessary.

Post # 4
Member
1570 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Agree with Honey, dont give a reason, just be polite.  I might say, sorry for any misunderstanding (although your invite was clear, this may help it go smoother). 

Post # 5
Member
636 posts
Busy bee

If you are dealing with pushy guests, I think using the “not enough room” reason is pretty good. It’s 100% non negotiable in my eyes, because all you have to say is that the venue is at capacity. Here’s what I would say: “The venue is at capacity and there *literally* isn’t any more space for additional guests – they won’t allow any more people due to fire bylaws. If we go over capacity, the venue will fine us, so we can’t budge”. DONE 🙂

Post # 6
Member
1321 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

i just cant believe people do this omg 😮

Post # 7
Member
1570 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Kazza:  

 

I would not say venue will fine us, they may offer to pay.   And if you say no room, they may say, well call us if you get regrets.   I would just say sorry.

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