I live in Los Angeles and my wedding is October 2009 in Connecticut. While some have told me, "Relax, you have plenty of time to book your venue!", after narrowing my list and contacting places I liked, many of them were already booked or have limited dates left. I'm about a hair away from losing the venue I like the most -sight unseen. I've seen detailed photos from people doing venue walk throughs, full weddings slideshows and my mother checking out the grounds (she's looking at the inside tonight - I hope!)
If money were no issue, I'm sure one could wait a little longer but if you want to secure a place that you love and is affordable, there's a lot of us wedding bees who may be looking at the same places so no, I don't think you can just "wait".
So - here I am, 1.5 weeks away from a trip to CT to look at venues and I found out that if I don't put down a deposit on the venue I love sight unseen, I may lose it. They are lovely people and their "rules" are quite flexible but holding the date is non-negotiable.
I could put down the deposit and pray that it's everything I hoped it to be (it really has everything I want) or I could wait and risk losing it. I've asked other brides/brides to be who have used/booked the venue and they love/loved it too.
I am a great believer that you can spend endless hours researching your options and it doesn't necessarily make you any better off. If you have talked personally with people who thought it was wonderful, and if your mom ends up thinking it's a good choice, I would just go with it. It will be one less thing to stress about.
We actually booked the first venue that we physically looked at. You can see lots of photos online, so I had cut down the prospective list quite a bit based on that, and on locations and such. I already knew what the venue looked like, so most of my decision was based on talking with the staff - which was the main reason for our meeting. I have girlfriends who spent dozens of hours over a few months scoping out venues, but I just didn't feel like it was worth my time, once I found one that I knew would be really nice, and with a staff that was very attentive and accomodating. Sure, I could have spent a few more weeks driving around to appointments - but like you, I was seeing that places were booking up for the dates I wanted. So I wrote the check and never looked back.
It's really up to you, but please don't feel like you have to visit dozens of places to fine "the perfect one." If you think this one will be perfectly fine, I don't think it's an issue to go with it sight unseen, provided that your mom gives it the thumbs up.
If you've spoken to the sight, they are flexible, nice and competent I say book it. I spent weeks looking for a venue that had just the look I wanted and although I still love it, I think knowing what I do now I would change it in a heartbeat for a place that is more organized and capable. If the pictures are nice and other brides love it, then it might be worth taking a chance. Just remember to read your contract closely so there aren't any surprises. No matter what, even if it isn't exactly what you hoped for, you have plenty of time to plan and instill personal touches that will make it a day to remember.
We booked our venue without seeing it first for the same reason...we had to sign the contract or we'd lose the date! What a bind. It turned out great because we did a lot of the research it sounds like you have already done.
The deciding factor was an idea of my DH...we used Google Earth to check out the surroundings of the venue. We had it narrowed down to two places until Google Earth revealed one was on a highway and the other was on a secluded mountain top. The promo pictures can be deceiving but Google Earth (and now Google street view through Google maps) don't lie!! Check both of those out before you sign. It really helped us. Best of all, they're free!
If you need any help, PM me. The hubs can give some pointers. Good luck!!
We booked our venue without seeing it first for the same reason...we had to sign the contract or we'd lose the date! What a bind. It turned out great because we did a lot of the research it sounds like you have already done.
The deciding factor was an idea of my DH...we used Google Earth to check out the surroundings of the venue. We had it narrowed down to two places until Google Earth revealed one was on a highway and the other was on a secluded mountain top. The promo pictures can be deceiving but Google Earth (and now Google street view through Google maps) don't lie!! Check both of those out before you sign. It really helped us. Best of all, they're free!
If you need any help, PM me. The hubs can give some pointers. Good luck!!
I did lots of research online and ended up booking the only place we went to go see -- and visiting was much more about trying the food than it was checking out the location. I wouldn't worry about it too much, especially since your mom's been there. Hopefully you can trust her judgment.
same thing here. i did all the research online -- calculated expenses, read reviews, chatted with catering managers -- but my parents actually saw them in person. essentially, they made the decision.
my contribution was the way i felt about the main contact. she was fantastic, so easy to work with, and helped ease the pain of distance planning. make sure you're comfortable with the person you're coordinating with, because that's crucial to your peace of mind.
we got the date that we wanted, and we love the venue so far! message me if you need any tips or help. :)
I am so glad I just saw your post! I am sitting at work about to cry cause I am stressing about where we are going to have the wedding.
I'm in Chicago and the wedding is going to be in North Carolina. I went there a few weeks ago and found "the place"... that was until the lady informed me that all private events have to be finished by 3:00 PM during that time!!! I was a little curious as to why this was not shared with me before...
I found a few more that will do, but I'm just not that crazy about them. I have since found some more online that I am going to have my fiance's parents go look at but I fear that I am going to have to make a decision without seeing them in person too and that scares that $*&! out of me!
But, like the PP have said, if you have seen enough pictures (which I'm not sure if you can ! ) and the people are nice and your mom thinks it is something that you will like, then it may be best to just go with it. I wish you the best of luck and please let me know how it turns out!!!!
Thank you everyone for your helpful and practical advice!
I know where the venue is-people can actually walk from the train station to the venue, although my mother says that it is so secluded it feels like you could be anywhere. The main contact is so lovely - they have some weddings but it's not their main business as they are a part of the town's historical society. The rest of the month is booked not with weddings but for a children's enchanted castle. I want to go there! For any history buffs, John Hancock got married there. You secure your own caterer so I don't have to committ to anything food related so it's just sight unseen, not sampling unseen.
LittleBear: what really made me fall for this venue and not want to lose it was looking at not the website photos, but doing a Google image search on the venue + wedding. A bunch of photographers who had shot weddings there were included in the search but it was one fantastic photographer's slideshow of a wedding at the venue that did all the work for me: not only could I see more of the space but I saw an actual recent (unposed) wedding. The changing room means a lot to me - I have no idea why. I think it may be getting dressed with the BMs, looking out the window at the people on the lawn. It looks like a girl's bedroom - simple yellow walls and hardwood floors - I just love that.
My mother is at the venue as we speak. If she gives me a thumbs up, I will scour through that contract before I sign. Actually our best man is a lawyer - YAY for happy coincidences.
Again, thank you all so much - I will keep you posted!
You just gave yourself my suggestion. We booked our site unseen. Fiance's mom did check it out when she gave the down payment, but I had scoured 100's upon 100's of pictures in Flickr before we booked it. I pretty much knew every inch of the place before I actually saw it!
Hi there,
I live in Los Angeles and my wedding is October 2009 in Connecticut. While some have told me, "Relax, you have plenty of time to book your venue!", after narrowing my list and contacting places I liked, many of them were already booked or have limited dates left. I'm about a hair away from losing the venue I like the most -sight unseen. I've seen detailed photos from people doing venue walk throughs, full weddings slideshows and my mother checking out the grounds (she's looking at the inside tonight - I hope!)
If money were no issue, I'm sure one could wait a little longer but if you want to secure a place that you love and is affordable, there's a lot of us wedding bees who may be looking at the same places so no, I don't think you can just "wait".
So - here I am, 1.5 weeks away from a trip to CT to look at venues and I found out that if I don't put down a deposit on the venue I love sight unseen, I may lose it. They are lovely people and their "rules" are quite flexible but holding the date is non-negotiable.
I could put down the deposit and pray that it's everything I hoped it to be (it really has everything I want) or I could wait and risk losing it. I've asked other brides/brides to be who have used/booked the venue and they love/loved it too.
Thoughts?
posted by pinwheelspoprocks 36 posts 2 months agoI am a great believer that you can spend endless hours researching your options and it doesn't necessarily make you any better off. If you have talked personally with people who thought it was wonderful, and if your mom ends up thinking it's a good choice, I would just go with it. It will be one less thing to stress about.
We actually booked the first venue that we physically looked at. You can see lots of photos online, so I had cut down the prospective list quite a bit based on that, and on locations and such. I already knew what the venue looked like, so most of my decision was based on talking with the staff - which was the main reason for our meeting. I have girlfriends who spent dozens of hours over a few months scoping out venues, but I just didn't feel like it was worth my time, once I found one that I knew would be really nice, and with a staff that was very attentive and accomodating. Sure, I could have spent a few more weeks driving around to appointments - but like you, I was seeing that places were booking up for the dates I wanted. So I wrote the check and never looked back.
It's really up to you, but please don't feel like you have to visit dozens of places to fine "the perfect one." If you think this one will be perfectly fine, I don't think it's an issue to go with it sight unseen, provided that your mom gives it the thumbs up.
posted by suzanno 1,978 posts 2 months agoIf you've spoken to the sight, they are flexible, nice and competent I say book it. I spent weeks looking for a venue that had just the look I wanted and although I still love it, I think knowing what I do now I would change it in a heartbeat for a place that is more organized and capable. If the pictures are nice and other brides love it, then it might be worth taking a chance. Just remember to read your contract closely so there aren't any surprises. No matter what, even if it isn't exactly what you hoped for, you have plenty of time to plan and instill personal touches that will make it a day to remember.
posted by jenjen08 21 posts 2 months agoWe booked our venue without seeing it first for the same reason...we had to sign the contract or we'd lose the date! What a bind. It turned out great because we did a lot of the research it sounds like you have already done.
The deciding factor was an idea of my DH...we used Google Earth to check out the surroundings of the venue. We had it narrowed down to two places until Google Earth revealed one was on a highway and the other was on a secluded mountain top. The promo pictures can be deceiving but Google Earth (and now Google street view through Google maps) don't lie!! Check both of those out before you sign. It really helped us. Best of all, they're free!
If you need any help, PM me. The hubs can give some pointers. Good luck!!
posted by MrsSpitzer 75 posts 2 months agoWe booked our venue without seeing it first for the same reason...we had to sign the contract or we'd lose the date! What a bind. It turned out great because we did a lot of the research it sounds like you have already done.
The deciding factor was an idea of my DH...we used Google Earth to check out the surroundings of the venue. We had it narrowed down to two places until Google Earth revealed one was on a highway and the other was on a secluded mountain top. The promo pictures can be deceiving but Google Earth (and now Google street view through Google maps) don't lie!! Check both of those out before you sign. It really helped us. Best of all, they're free!
If you need any help, PM me. The hubs can give some pointers. Good luck!!
posted by MrsSpitzer 75 posts 2 months agoI did lots of research online and ended up booking the only place we went to go see -- and visiting was much more about trying the food than it was checking out the location. I wouldn't worry about it too much, especially since your mom's been there. Hopefully you can trust her judgment.
posted by bluegreenjean 118 posts 2 months agosame thing here. i did all the research online -- calculated expenses, read reviews, chatted with catering managers -- but my parents actually saw them in person. essentially, they made the decision.
my contribution was the way i felt about the main contact. she was fantastic, so easy to work with, and helped ease the pain of distance planning. make sure you're comfortable with the person you're coordinating with, because that's crucial to your peace of mind.
we got the date that we wanted, and we love the venue so far! message me if you need any tips or help. :)
posted by stargirl 12 posts 2 months agoI am so glad I just saw your post! I am sitting at work about to cry cause I am stressing about where we are going to have the wedding.
I'm in Chicago and the wedding is going to be in North Carolina. I went there a few weeks ago and found "the place"... that was until the lady informed me that all private events have to be finished by 3:00 PM during that time!!! I was a little curious as to why this was not shared with me before...
I found a few more that will do, but I'm just not that crazy about them. I have since found some more online that I am going to have my fiance's parents go look at but I fear that I am going to have to make a decision without seeing them in person too and that scares that $*&! out of me!
But, like the PP have said, if you have seen enough pictures (which I'm not sure if you can !
) and the people are nice and your mom thinks it is something that you will like, then it may be best to just go with it. I wish you the best of luck and please let me know how it turns out!!!!
posted by LittleBear 80 posts 2 months agoThank you everyone for your helpful and practical advice!
I know where the venue is-people can actually walk from the train station to the venue, although my mother says that it is so secluded it feels like you could be anywhere. The main contact is so lovely - they have some weddings but it's not their main business as they are a part of the town's historical society. The rest of the month is booked not with weddings but for a children's enchanted castle. I want to go there! For any history buffs, John Hancock got married there. You secure your own caterer so I don't have to committ to anything food related so it's just sight unseen, not sampling unseen.
LittleBear: what really made me fall for this venue and not want to lose it was looking at not the website photos, but doing a Google image search on the venue + wedding. A bunch of photographers who had shot weddings there were included in the search but it was one fantastic photographer's slideshow of a wedding at the venue that did all the work for me: not only could I see more of the space but I saw an actual recent (unposed) wedding. The changing room means a lot to me - I have no idea why. I think it may be getting dressed with the BMs, looking out the window at the people on the lawn. It looks like a girl's bedroom - simple yellow walls and hardwood floors - I just love that.
posted by pinwheelspoprocks 36 posts 2 months agoMy mother is at the venue as we speak. If she gives me a thumbs up, I will scour through that contract before I sign. Actually our best man is a lawyer - YAY for happy coincidences.
Again, thank you all so much - I will keep you posted!
Pinwheel,
You just gave yourself my suggestion. We booked our site unseen. Fiance's mom did check it out when she gave the down payment, but I had scoured 100's upon 100's of pictures in Flickr before we booked it. I pretty much knew every inch of the place before I actually saw it!
posted by doctorgirl 160 posts 2 months agoWould you mind terribly telling me where the venue is?
posted by emilybrooke 46 posts 2 months ago