Help us decide

posted 3 years ago in Venue
  • poll: If you were in our situation, which would you choose?
    Reception @ Banquet Hall, Golf Club etc. : (15 votes)
    44 %
    Backyard Reception : (19 votes)
    56 %
  • Post # 3
    6685 posts
    Bee Keeper

    No one can tell you what to do, but  having the older relatives be there would be the most significant thing to me. 


    Post # 4
    2657 posts
    Sugar bee

    That’s a tough choice.  At the end of the day, your wedding should be like your vision, and if that means waiting another year to save up for the formal venue it may be worthwhile.  That being said, there are a lot of benefits to doing a backyard wedding, the savings being the biggest benefit.  You could use the money you’re saving and put it towards fixing up the yard – maybe some nice landscaping or decor.  You could also put the leftover money towards renting a tent and dance floor to give more of a formal feel in the yard.  The nice thing about a yard is that it’s kind of like a blank slate – you can make it more casual or more formal with some creative decor choices.  

    Post # 5
    926 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    First off, ignore everyone else (the outside people you mentioned, not other posters).  People love to give their opinions/advice/say so, especially if they’ve been there done that.  Gag.


    Second, just take my comments with a grain of salt.  We chose the more formal venue for our wedding primarily because it’s what I always envisioned and dreamed of, and I didn’t want to have any regrets later.  I was afraid if I gave in and did the less expensive casual backyard party I would live with the regret too long.  Yes we could have had more money in our pockets, but we didn’t really need it.  The other factor for me was having it at the venue meant they did everything for us (food, drinks, decor, flowers).  I only had to find a DJ and photographer.  I would have had to do everything myself with the backyard reception and I did not want to take on the stress.


    Ultimately this is YOU and FI’s wedding.  It’s totally up to you.  Based on your facts and being a non-biased third party, the reasonable solution is the backyard reception.  But don’t do anything you will look back on and say I wish I hadn’t done that.


    Post # 6
    9859 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    make yourself happy – what’s more important, the location or the timing?


    I’m dealing with this now.  I could have the venue that I adore IF I was willing to wait until 2015 to get married.  I’m not.  I’ve been waiting to get married for what feels like forever.  I just want to be married.  I’m happy with our plan B that we can afford next year (Plan A is at least double the cost).


    Post # 7
    3833 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

     Could you cut the difference and do a formal backyard reception… white tents, bartender, rented dance floor, etc. I’ve seen it done very nicely and probably still much less expensive than the other option.

    Backyard doesn’t automatically equal casual bbq unless that’s what you want it to be. You’ll need more room for the more formal version, but it can be done.

    Post # 8
    463 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    This might sound callous, but how elderly is “elderly”?  Is anyone in failing health?

    My father had me when he was older, so I’ve alway been nervous about him being around, and he’s in his mid-70s now. But as the date grows closer, I realize that he’s in pretty good health, and if I had waited a year it would have most likely been okay.

    If everyone is in pretty good health, I would vote the formal route.

    Post # 10
    170 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Go with what you REALLY want 🙂

    Post # 11
    2962 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @LadyBear:  +1. Also why can’t you have the backyard wedding in 2015? This will give you time to lose the weight you want and you can also have time to work on any DIY projects (if you plan on having any) you want to take on. Honestly I had the fairy tale wedding and as horrible as it sounds, I regret spending that much money and it was only 7K! I still ended up not getting the wedding I wanted in the end. If I could do it all over again, my focus would have been on photography and food not the perfect venue or the perfect dress. You want to enjoy your day and have other loved ones enjoying your day as well. To hell with anyone that you think will “judge” you. They don’t have to come.

    Post # 13
    3112 posts
    Sugar bee

    @MissMay3003:  That’s what I was thinking!  You only get married once!

    Post # 14
    7 posts

    Good for what you want BUT please be careful with vendors as 2015 is far away-you want to make sure that the vendors don’t go out of business by then. PAY WITH CREDIT CARDS ONLY!!

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