- 6 years ago
- Wedding: June 2011
My fiance and I are both 25 and in medical school, which means lots of stress, debt, and minimal time to plan or even have a wedding.
My parents are able to contribute $10,000 to the wedding, and his family is not able to contribute anything.
We originally wanted to elope while backpackign in Central America, but my father got sentimental and asked that whatever we did, he, my mother and grandmother wanted to be there. Naturally, if my family were to come, his would have to come as well.
We had considered running to Napa, or somewhere exotic to elope and invite our family, but his single mother lost her job over a year ago and would not be able to travel to many exotic destinations.
So, we decided to have a small wedding in Savannah (a 7hr drive from where we are) and only invite closest friends and family. Well, that plan slowly got shot down by our families.
So, we have decided to have our wedding in my hometown. Our guest list has slowly creeped up to ~200 people. Fortunately, with a lot of hard work, pulling strings, and lots of phone calls, I have been able to get the wedding to my taste and budgeted to around $7,000.
However, all of this work has come without help from family and my medical school grades are slipping. I am approaching two harder modules, and will not be able to contribute the time into working on the weding that I have over the last few months. My family all but refuses to help. Also, the last three months of the wedding leave us with many weekends being filled with engagement parties, bridal teas, couples showers, bachelorette parties, etc. I repeat, I am a medical student, which literally means I get 1-2 free weekends every 5 weeks.
My fiance and I are now stressed and overwhelmed with the duty of planning a wedding that neither of us really wanted in the first place. All we simply want is to make our vows, have a nice honeymoon, and put some money into the bank. However, if we go through with current plans, we will blow all $10,000 on a wedding and honeymoon leaving us with no extra money to put into savings. Since we are both in medical school, we have virtually no ability to provide any emergent funds in case of emergency. Due to the stress of everything and desire for a nice honeymoon with extra savings, we are now considering cancelling the wedding and eloping with only about $500-$1000 lost in deposits. We will then run off to a nice $4,000 honeymoon and put about $5,000 in the bank.
Has anyone cancelled a wedding to elope? Should we go through with our plans since the wedding is only 90 days away? Has anyone been in this position before? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.