Help. We're on a break

posted 1 week ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

You say you’re working on your insecurities, can I ask what you are doing about them? Are you seeing a therapist?

In my opinion, a break would be best. It’s difficult to work on your problems and be in a relationship all at the same time.

I’m sure I don’t need to tell you this, but what you are putting him through is incredibly unfair.

Take this break and focus on unpacking your baggage and helping yourself.

Post # 3
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Also, demons don’t disappear over night. It takes hard work to face them and it’s even harder to over come them. 

It goes beyond realizing you have a problem. Acknowledging your problem is the first step, the hard work comes after

Post # 6
Member
555 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

zmommy12 :  I’m sorry but I would not be ok with him being friends with an ex.. especially not if she was texting him daily, and “good morning” at 6:30am. Maybe this is unfair and I am a just a naturally jealous person.. but this would not sit well with me (especially if he has a history of cheating, I know it was years ago but it was on his PREGNANT WIFE). He needs to meet you halfway and help alleviate your insecurities by showing that you can trust him unconditionally.

Post # 7
Member
3287 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

So many things don’t sit right with me. Why is a 38 year old dating a 22 year old???? He cheated on his wife when she was pregnant??!! 

In regards to you- self talk and meditating are not going to cut it. You are overstepping by checking his phone and blocking someone on it. You need to start seeing a therapist. 

Post # 9
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

zmommy12 : 

Bee, I’m sorry 🙁 you must be hurting but this is an opportunity to work on your insecurities. It looks like his past played a roll in adding to your insecurities but yours did too.

Use this as a time out to truly help yourself, start seeing a therapist.

Post # 11
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

I don’t think this is all about you being insecure.  He’s giving you a reason to feel this way and I would honestly be feeling the same way as you.  He’s cheated before and he’s being weird and not contacting you for a whole day at a time and not to mention texting this other girl.  Sounds like this relationship isn’t going to end up working out.  I think he’s the problem, not you.

Post # 12
Member
3893 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

zmommy12 :  Sorry you’re hurting but it sounds like it’s for the best. This was clearly not a healthy situation for you. You need to take this time to work on your insecurities (preferably with a therapist). When you are ready you can find someone who makes you feel more secure.

Post # 14
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: June 2017

zmommy12 :  Good god girl, pull yourself together! This man sounds like a creep…cheating on his pregnant wife??? You’re better off, how do you not see this? And come on, texting another woman then getting mad at you for being upset? then giving you the silent treatment?

Their are millions of other men out their who know how to treat a woman with respect. Stop taking the blame and saying you have your insecurities…this man is scum. You can have your insecurities but he’s clearly doing things that is making you lose your trust in him. Please stop giving this guy any effort or another second of your time. Focus on you! 

Post # 15
Member
888 posts
Busy bee

I know you’re hurting but there was so much wrong with this. And maybe you have insecurities but hell, if my DH was getting early morning texts from his ex I’d be insecure too. Bee, there is nothing worse than a guy who does shady stuff – and you said you know deep down it isn’t right – but makes you feel like YOU have the problem. The second you find yourself in a situation feeling sick over messages, blocking numbers, calling the ex, questioning his motives, you know you are in the wrong relationship. He may have broken up with you but YOU have dodged a bullet. 

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