Post # 1
I received a wedding invitation and the response card looks like this:
____ Declines with regret
____ # of guests
The invitation is addressed only to me, not “qui40067 and guest.” But there’s a blank to indicate numbers of guests. The bride knows I’m newly engaged (I was not when she sent out the invitations). I’m confused as to whether or not I’m allowed a +1 or not?
Post # 3
It seems to me that you would be aloud one, maybe you could call just in case?
Post # 4
I would say that if it was addressed to you, and not +guest, it’s meant just to be for you. The number of persons attending probably occurs on everyone’s card, so there wasn’t going to be a custom one for you.
I’m guessing if there was no “and guest” that its’ just one invite for you.
Post # 5
I think that if it is addressed just to you, it is meant just for you. There is a blank for the number of guests (i’m sure) because she sent the same invite out to everyone, even families of 4, etc.
Post # 6
Are you close to the bride? I’d consider asking, if you feel comfortable. Otherwise I would accpet it as just you, and either accept or decline as you wish.
Honestly, unless I’m misunderstanding the invitation, I think the way she worded it was a little ridiculous. The “# of guests” line is like a grand total or something. But there is nothing to total (ie adults + children OR chicken +beef). It’s going to be the same number that’s written on the “accept” line.
I’m probably sounding mean, but it’s confusing. That deserves a phone call or two.
Post # 7
My FI got an RSVP card with the exact same thing from a coworker last week. I never seen it, because he sent it back before I got a chance. He said he put total number of guests: 2. And I asked him if he was sure I was invited. He said yes, and I asked who the outer envelope was addressed to, him or him + guest? He said just him, and because he had already sent it back, I told him he better ask his coworker if he was allowed to bring me. Because of our own wedding planning, I don’t want uninvited guests showing up at our wedding, and I sure as heck will not be an uninvited guest at someone else’s. He asked his friend and he said, I am indeed invited. So, yes I would just get in touch, call/text/facebook with the couple and ask if he is invited.
Post # 8
no plus one. the max number of people on each line is ONE because ONE is the number of guests on the envelope…
Post # 9
I think it means you were invited by yourself. Call if you’re really close, but just put yourself in her shoes, and try to think about whether it would be weird or make you uncomfortable if she called to ask about an invite!
But I agree that RSVP response option is weird.
Post # 10
I would call and make sure but it does sound like it was only meant for you, which to me would be a little rude since you were obviously in a serious relationship and now newly engaged (unless it’s a really, really small wedding). Call and ask if you can add your FI.
Post # 11
Only the person on the envelope. Corgi is right about the same RSVP for everyone. It might be a buffet so maybe there doesn’t need to be dinner choices.
Post # 12
I don’t see the confusion about # of guests line, I’m doing that because uh, I want to know how many people are coming and some invitations are to a couple with two kids, I don’t know if they are bringing their kid or leaving them at home or if only one part of a couple is coming. If they just check the Accepts line I wouldn’t have an accurate count for the caterer.
By etiquette the invite is only for you – but since it’s pretty rude and out there to invite someone without inviting their fiance and not everyone knows etiquette it’s worth asking the bride/groom in order to clarify.
Post # 13
I’d ask… You’d feel kind of weird if you went alone and then she asked at the wedding where your FI was! Plus, not everyone reads weddingbee and other wedding sites, so they might not even consider the implications of not putting +1.
Post # 14
What a TERRIBLY written RSVP! I’ll bet she’s getting lots of phone calls, that is just confusing as hell. It should have read __ of __ guests attending, with the # of guests invited filled in FOR you so you don’t have to guess! UGH! She left it open for you to invite just about anyone you want the way it is worded! I would contact her and ask if your fiance is invited.
Post # 15
Thanks ladies! I sent her a quick fb message, asking and letting her know that I of course understood if he was not invited because there’s not room in the budget, especially now that I’m planning my own wedding (trying my best to give her a gracious out, if necessary). But thankfully, she responded back within an hour saying that my FI is invited and that she allotted for +1s across the board. That’s one bold bride 🙂
So yay! FI is invited!
Post # 16
I think RSVP cards in general are confusing! That’s why I prefer the traditional blank ones where the guest writes all the info in. If it was only addressed to you, I would assume only you are invited, but you can always confirm with the bride I don’t think there’s anything wrong with askign for clarification, especiallys since you are engaged 🙂