Post # 1
We are getting married in a smallish courtyard in New Orleans. I always thought that We would have small rounds (four people per table) with no assigned seats. I had no interest in having a head table for our wedding party, for family, or for myself and my hubby. Really, from what I know, we really don’t get to sit down much anyway! We are having a buffet, so a seated dinner isn’t a problem to the equation.
But here lies the problem: My mom is insisting on having special seats for the family and myself and my future husband near the front and each other.
I have been to plenty of weddings where the bridal party is separated from everyone else, including their dates and I don’t want that. I also don’t want for the bridal party and their dates, the family and ourselves all have assigned, reserved seating and for everyone else not to (that’s the majority of the wedding guests anyway!).
It has been suggested that we do long tables, but I think this leads to people camping and not dancing and moving around which I don’t want either!!!
What can I do??? Help!!! I am at a complete loss!
Post # 3
- Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club
This is just my personal opinion, but it might be easier on your guests to have assigned seating in the end. And I know you don’t want to be “separate” from the other guests…but I think it would definitely be important to make sure that your table/family’s tables are reserved. I’m just thinking that your guests will be seated before yourself and your bridal party, etc…and by the time you are announced there won’t be good seating for you! At least with the assigned seating you can make sure that your bridal party is able to sit with their dates, etc. I am not having my Bridal Party sit at a head table; we are putting them at all separate tables (Mr. B’s groomsmen/my BM’s aren’t friends, so it wouldn’t make sense to sit them together).
Post # 4
Why don’t you put a few tables with a “reserved” sign on them and tell your parents and anybody else who needs special seating that they will have those seats. The rest of the tables you can leave as free seating.
Post # 5
I would suggest putting reserve on a few tables for your family and bridal party to sit at. I’ve been to a few weddings where people rushed to get a “good” table and the bridal party/family were still taking photos so when they arrived to the reception room the “good” tables were taken. Or there wasn’t enought seats for couples or a family of 3-4 to sit together. In my opinion, your parents being near you two is really important.
Post # 6
Assigned seating, as much as it’s a pain, is usually the best option, honestly. I hate feeling like I have to scramble to get a table- it stresses me out, I usually end up at tables I don’t like if I don’t know anyone and it generally is just a big… production.
Post # 7
I totally agree with *pinkmonkee* and *vintage* – You don’t have to do a completely assigned seating chart. Just place “reserved” signs on some of the tables – enough for your family and wedding party.
I have been to only one reception without reserved seating. These were my two gripes:
(1) There were half regular tables with chairs and half bistro (tall) tables without chairs. There was not enough seating for everyone. SOOOO my husband gave up his seat for an elderly lady so she could sit down to eat. And I ended up finding one seat at a table full of people I didn’t even know because my family table was completely full! This was really annoying – so whatever you do, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE provide enough seating!
(2) I was a reader in this wedding and therefore involved in some of the after ceremony pictures. So by the time we got to the reception ALL the chairs were turned up at the tables to signify that the seats had been saved (like highschool). Because people had taken seats away from some tables to join others, my Darling Husband and I could not find 2 seats together! So we waited for others to eat and finally got chairs together and had cold food. Boo.
I would hate for either of these things to happen to the most important people in your life (your family and wedding party)!!
Post # 8
i agree with the others. i would at least reserve some seats for you, your family, and bridal party. i wouldn’t want to have to send my hubby around looking for seats together at my own wedding.
Post # 9
I think a reserved would be a good option. But I’m with the others in that reserved seating saves your guest a lot of headache. My only suggestion is that if you have too much seating, or more tables than you need, then you can do open seating. People will sit in odd groups and numbers in open seating.
I think if you are doing four at a table, it might help to pair up couples you know will do well together. In an intimate environment, you only have a few people to talk to at dinner. In a large table, with say 8 or 10 people at it, you can keep your mouth shut if you don’t want to talk to someone else. But at a 4-top, that is SUPER awkward.
Post # 10
I agree that assigned seating is much nicer. And I think no matter what you do people are still going to camp out at their tables. I had small round tables and people still sat at them all night long – even during the cocktail hour before dinner. I guess people don’t like to mingle much!
Post # 11
- Wedding: September 2009 - Barr Mansion
We didn’t do assigned seating either, and it was totally fine. But we did have a reserved table for immediate family and bridal party. We had a sweetheart table, so it wasn’t exactly the same. You don’t have to do it by any means, but I do think it’s good to have the option for your immediate family to all sit together with the bride and groom.
Post # 12
what if you used the CENTER tables for family and bridal party? And just put “Reserved for family” signs on half a dozen tables? You could put a sweetheart table in the very center of the room with Bride and Groom (or Mr/Mrs Cashmere) signs on the chairs.
That way you’re still in the thick of things, but your mom gets her family tables.