(Closed) Here is a touchy question… How do you merge your incomes??

posted 8 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
8354 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

When we moved in together, we opened up joint checking and savings accounts and just put all of our money in there. It didn’t matter who was making more. We pay everything out of the same account. We consider ourselves as one, so for us, it just doesn’t make sense to split everything. There are no loans to be paid back. His bills are my bills and my bills are his bills.

Post # 4
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My FI and I have started to merge our incomes and have a joint credit card. Ideally, I want to save his income entirely and just use mine for living expenses. We’ve discussed how we’re going to set things up when we’re married and I think we’re going to keep our individual accounts and just add each other on to the other’s account. 

If you’ve always done everything very separately, the expectations might be different so you really should talk about it.

Post # 5
Member
1740 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

sisnce we started living together we open a joint account and put both of our pay check in that account. no matter who makes what money, we pay everything . we both have a debit card and even credit cards. there were never any issues when it came to money. for us it was easy

Post # 6
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

We have a joint account that we each contribute equally to and use to pay for things like house, utilities, and other living expenses, and then we each have our own independent accounts that pay for things like student loans or individual spending money. We are pretty casual about it—e.g., if one of us needs cash and the other has some, it just gets handed off without tracking this in any way—but for the big ticket things it works well for us. We don’t plan to change this arrangement post-wedding, except of course to change the amounts we are contributing to the joint account as joint expenses change.

Post # 7
Member
34 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Yeah it was really simple for us as soon as we moved in with each other we went to the bank and opened up a joint checking account.  We both have our own that we had before we got together but our checks are directly put into the joint account except for about $50 a week that goes into our own so we have a little money the other has no idea what we use it for (ie being able to suprise each other with out the other already knowing from the bank statement)

Post # 8
Member
3871 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I make more money than the DH does.  So we have a joint checking account to pay for all the bills and then we each have our own seperate savings account.  Oh, we also have a joint savings account, too.

It sounds to me like you FI, may have a problem with sharing money.  That or maybe since he only has a part time job, he doesn’t have a lot of money, which is why he asks you to pay him back when you do borrow money from him.  

Like you, I do have a lot of student loans and my DH has some but not as much as I do.  Since I make more money than him, I don’t feel bad because my extra income is paying for my  student loans.  If it was the other way around, I don’t know what I would do because I definitely would not want him paying for my loans.

All and all, we are now married so any debt we put on his credit cards or mine, becomes OUR debt… which is why we pay our credit cards from our joint account.  We both know how much is on our credit cards. 

Also, we do have seperate checking accounts, too.  So I put a small percentage into each of them so we can spend it how we wish.  I spend it on clothes, makeup and stuff like that and he spends it on comics books and his stuff.  

Sorry, you might be confused on how many accounts we have so let me break it down…

1 joint checking account

2 separate checking accounts

1 joint savings account

a few separate savings accounts (ING, retirement, etc..)

Oh, yeah the checking accounts each come with it’s own debit card.  So I have a debit card for our joint account and another card for my personal checking account.  

The separate accounts are good if you want to buy each other a gift and don’t necessary want to give a gift to him from the joint account. 

Post # 10
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

when we first moved in together, everything was seperate. we also weren’t thinking of getting married then, everything was still new, so we didn’t even think about a joint accoint. a little bit after we got engaged, we started to combine finances. now we have joint everything- credit card, savings, and checking. there’s no mine and his for money, it’s all ours.

Post # 11
Hostess
18646 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

My husband and I combined our incomes right away.  I don’t like the idea of having seperate bank accounts but we have our own set amount of play money every month.  We only have to ask eachother if we want to spend more than that on something.  He will not be responsible for your student loans and you won’t be responsible for his even if you combine your incomes into the same account.

Post # 12
Member
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We combined once we got engaged and bought a house. It doesn’t matter who makes more, it’s all *our* money. We are both helping eachother pay off the student debt, because we really do feel like a team!

Post # 13
Member
1194 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We actually keep our money separate for the most part and will continue to do that after we get married.  We have a joint account that each of us contributes to for our bills & food, that’s it.  We have our own separate accounts for our personal bills (credit card) and personal spending.  This works for us and I am more comfortable like that than if we just had one account for everything.

Post # 14
Member
1560 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

We are kind of similar to the other ladies. We have a joint “house” account where our bills come out of, (utilities, mortgage, car pmts, insurance, groceries, etc), then a “wedding” account which will eventually become a savings account…if we’re lucky enough to have leftover cash, haha. Each of us has our own checking and savings accounts as well, it’s not that we don’t trust each other, but we are both very independent people who like to do our own things, I have dinner with my girlfriends often and I don’t expect him to pay for that. Just like I don’t want to have to pay for his nights out with the guys. Also if we have birthday or Christmas surprises we can keep it a surprise! 🙂 It works well for us, but I understand that some people it’s not ideal for. Just remember that open communication is the best, if either of us is going to spend more than $200 we consult with the other person, it’s just fair that way, but it’s a decision we made together. Communication is the best way to get it going! 🙂

Post # 15
Member
1051 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Neither of us came into the relationship with any debt, but we just went ahead and combined everything right after getting engaged.  FI makes about twice what I do, but we just use the “what’s yours is mine & what’s mine is yours” motto.  It works for us!

Post # 16
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’m going to have a lot of student debt and he’ll have none, but we’ll both be making the same (grad student stipends).  We’ve already talked about this and agreed to just join all funds AND debts.  

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