Post # 1
Hi ladies, I wanted to say I have been reading up here on the bee for a few weeks now, just created an account today. I actually thought I had done it already, but I went to respond to someone, and couldn’t…lol. It has been really great to read other ladies thoughts and plans. It has been a really great help, and comfort!
I am in the pre-getting engaged stage. I know it is coming…just don’t know when. I picked out the ring already, and I know it was purchased. (This is just so you guys know what stage I am in the planning).
Anyway, the reason I am posting today, is because I just got off the phone with my mom. Telling her that we were starting to talk timelines. (Me and my guy are the only ones that know a ring is in the picture). I went from excitedly talking to my mom, to being completly deflated by the end of the conversation.
Basically, reality has started in…. money, dates, wether people can attend. All things I didn’t really have to think about until now. Kind of puts a bit of a kink in things. I’m sure you have all been there… I’m just getting my first dose of it…. and it doesn’t taste good. Oh well… I just guess I would have liked not all my bubbles to have been burst at one time.
Just so you guys don’t think I had crazy expectations or anything… (I don’t). An example of what I am talking about is us wanting to get married on our anniversery, well, that is on a tuesday. My mother basically said people will not come…talk behind our backs…etc.
Can’t wait for the great guy to come home from work…and say it will all be ok. 🙂
Post # 3
@Candycane: Hey, welcome to the Bee! I know what you mean, my wedding is on a Wednesday and had to deal with those comments myself. At the end of the day, if a person really values you and wants to be there, they will. That is how I look at it anyway!
Post # 4
you have YOUR wedding when you want to have YOUR wedding.
I am going to a destination wedding on a freaking wednesday. Know why? Because I care about my friend and want to be there for her.
So what I am saying is…have your wedding whatever day you choose. The people who care to be there will be there. The people who make an issue or talk behind your back can stay home.
Post # 5
I got married on a Tuesday!!!! Although in my community weeknight weddings are extremely common.
Post # 6
I say don’t worry about it and enjoy the engagement when it comes. I don’t think people will talk behind your backs for that, but your mom has a point it would be a hard day to take for work. But I feel like you are getting ahead of yourself right now.
Post # 7
Try not to stress too much about the wedding yet. Your SO might have some ideas/comments about when he would like to have the wedding once you get engaged. When it comes down to it, it is a day for the two of you, not to accomodate everyone you know, because that will nearly be impossible! Do what will make you and your SO happy and enjoy your special day!
Post # 8
It’s your day, and the people who really love you will be there. That being said, you also have to understand that weekday weddings do cause trouble for some guests, especially those who may have to travel. You’ll have to be forgiving if some people can’t make it because of that! As long as you’re happy, your wedding will be wonderful.
Post # 9
In the week after my engagement, I went from ball-of-happy-excitement to curling up in a ball on the bathroom floor while the shower was running so no one could hear me crying. I knew how much weddings cost, I knew how many people we had to invite, but when it came down to having my parents spend that much money for one day for me? I crumpled.
But there is a light at the end of the tunnel! We’re making it work and I’m planning on returning the favor to my parents somehow– not sure yet, but I’ll figure something out! Don’t think about other people. Plan the wedding you want to have, with a budget you can work with.
Post # 10
Try to relax and enjoy this time. You aren’t engaged yet, so why start stressing already? I have really practical parents that sometimes deflate me with all “what if’s” and possiblities. For now, just try to block her out. Cross the bridge of money, who can attend and all the details when you have to. It’s really exciting that you’ll be getting engaged!! Focus on that, details can wait. Hope that helps!
Post # 11
I know how you feel, we got married on our anniversary & it was a Sunday, still a weekend and people still complained. Honestly its your day, the people that matter won’t care and the people who care don’t matter. You’ll get a great deal on venues by having a weekday wedding. Just let it roll off, it’ll still be everything you dreamed of!!
Post # 12
Welcome to the Hive!
You can’t please everyone. Some people just enjoy critiquing and complaining.
Post # 13
I JUST figured out how to find this post again! lol, I’m finding my way around the bee!
@twocitybride , I totally was getting ahead of myself. Thanks to my mother, she has that effect on me(my parents sound like coloradogirls). My guy got my head back on straight…. after a bunch of crying. I am now waiting patiently, and of course reading the bee!
I had just got myself so tangled in knots, thinking omg, I have not enough time….I have to figure everything out now. Ummm…now that the smoke has cleared. I realized that was the stupidist thing to be thinking. lol, we are not even thinking about anything until late 2013!!!
@bookworm88 yeah, that was kind of me. I couldn’t BELIEVE the cost of these things…even basic weddings….except I was crying on the shoulder of a bewildered boyfriend. lol.
So thanks ladies for the welcome, and encouragment!
And i ill do nothing but fantasize, read here, and “Pin” until the engagement. So much time to be stressed, don’t need to start now!
Post # 14
I feel you, for real. It’s all very exciting, but when realiy hits, it hits hard. We’re still in the process of finding a venue, and it’s been almost a month of searching. Just wait until you’re engaged to really stress yourself out, haha. And remember, take it one step at a time. Just focus on one aspect of the wedding, and once that is finished, move on to the next project.
If you want a Tuesday wedding do it. I wish we could do it during the week, or even a Sunday, because it’s so much cheaper. But, since 80% of our guests are out of town, it’s totally unrealistic. Pretty much none of them would be able to come. That was our deciding factor on having it on a Saturday.
Post # 15
hey i just wanted to post to say your getting married how exciting, please keep that excitement!! my hubby to be made an excellent point when i get stessed about our wedding the most important thing is that we get married everything else is just really doesnt matter in the end!!
Post # 16
I know where you are coming from…My Fiance and I are getting married on a Thursday. MY family has no issue with (to them, it’s just an excuse to take a long weekend!) His family was against it and tried to convince us no one would come.
Basically, we told them that we are getting married that day, whether they like it or not.
The people who care about you will FIND a way to get to your wedding.
Don’t stress, your engagement is a time to enjoy 🙂