- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
First off, I am so sorry about the length of this post! I just have to get this off my chest and I was hoping you could help me out with this!
So I have a former post about my best friend’s wedding and how I wasn’t sure what to do with my Maid/Matron of Honor speech considering her fiancé is awful and he treats her terribly. Well now I need some more advice from you guys and I’m hoping you all can help me figure this one out.
So Friday, my Maid/Matron of Honor and best friend, let’s call her T, calls me hysterically crying to the point that I can barely understand her telling me how mean another one of our very close friends is. When I asked her to elaborate she said because she asked this mutual friend if she was going to be as excited for T’s wedding as she is for mine. After a little hesitation she answered with a very honest and sugar coated answer that she knows my fiancé much better than she knows T’s and she is excited if T is happy.
Well needless to say, T took this as our friend likes me better and loves me more and thinks I am going to have a better wedding. Since the beginning there has been constant comparison and the weddings are going to be very different so there is no reason for there to be any.
T kept going on and on about how mean this friend is and how she doesn’t even want her in her wedding if she doesn’t approve of the marriage. I kept apologizing that she was so upset and that this friend hurt her, that was all I could do because I couldn’t disagree with anything this friend told her and it was said in the nicest way possible!
Well T sensed this and eventually I had to say that I couldn’t disagree with what our friend said and that over the years I have seen her fiancé treat her very poorly and I have seen them fight like no one should and I had reservations and was worried about her being happy and the relationship lasting. I also expressed that I agreed to be her Maid/Matron of Honor because I love her and cherish our friendship and will support her in decisions she makes and whatever makes her happy.
She didn’t like this even more and she told me she was too emotional and needed to hang up on me. She did and I sat and thought about what happened and I decided to send her a text message that said “I’m not trying to get into a fight with you T, you are my best friend and I am here to support you no matter what and I love you very much. Our friendship means a lot to me and much more than any of this –the last thing I want is for this to affect our friendship, I didn’t mean to upset you more”. Granted, she ignored it and never answered.
I tried to act like nothing happened and figured we could just brush this off. We all made plans to get our nails done Friday for MY wedding and I texted her to tell her I made an appointment this morning and still she ignored that too.
Now my question to you guys is, my own wedding is Sunday and that is basically the only reason I am so upset over all of this. She is an attention seeker and I feel as if she is trying to steal the attention from me and my wedding and I am not going to let that happen. I do not think that I did anything wrong and if it were me I would want my closest friends to be honest with me, but we need to work this through. I feel as if I already put myself out there with the text messages she chose to ignore and I am not comfortable crawling back by calling her. Was I wrong for telling her? Am I doing the right thing? How should I remedy this so that it doesn’t blow up at my wedding? I’m sorry again for the length, I just really would appreciate your feedback on this and advice.