Post # 1
Now that I am pregnant, I find it hilarious how much Hollywood lied to me about the experience. I thought it might be fun to list all the silly/unrealistic things depicted in movies/tv that, up until you became pregnant yourself, you might have thought were true! I’ll start:
— All women have rampant morning sickness that strikes at the most inopportune times. I am very lucky in that I only got sick twice, and both times I was just farting around my house on a weekend. I stressed really unnecessarily about what I thought was a given part of pregnancy.
— No woman actually goes and buys a pregnancy test until she’s been hurling into toilets/trash cans for a few days. Um, I bought mine the day I stopped taking my BC pills, and then POAS the day I expected my next period, before there were any symptoms at all!
— All women are just standing around, minding their own business, when… BAM! They feel a kick! And they totally know it’s a kick, no uncertainty at all! I am 20 weeks and still not totally sure if I am feeling the baby or gas, lol.
Anyone have any more?
Post # 3
How about, you have one contraction, you KNOW that “honey, this is it!” The next second you are in full on labor while driving to the hospital, then you are pushing and then, voila, the baby is born! Better yet, you are out in the woods or at a shopping mall or in an elevator and a random stranger who knows nothing about birth is telling you to PUSH, because as soon as you have a contraction it is totally time to push and then you push a few times (after saying, “I can’t do it!” and the stranger telling you, “Yes, you can!”) and the baby comes out, looking about 15 pounds and three months old but who cares!
Post # 4
How about after the baby is born your stomach magically returns to how it looked pre-baby. No freaking way.
Post # 5
I’ve always rolled my eyes at the hollywood version of going into labor where first time moms have their water GUSH OUT and they are all of a sudden in intense labor GET ME TO THE HOSPITAL NOWWWW. Uh, most women dont’ even have their water break as a first sign of labor and even if they do, contractions don’t pick up like that right away…
Post # 6
@MrsAKSkier: I do forgive them for the way-too-big “newborns,” since I get why they can’t actually use real newborns, but LOL on the overaccelerated labor! And yeah, how is everyone in the world a midwife?
@Treejewel19: Aw, darn, I was still hoping that one would be true… 😉
@quierajen: Hah, yes! I had this vision of labor as just seven hours of uninterrupted pain, when it sounds like it is more, a few minutes of intense pain, break, a few minutes of intense pain, break.
Post # 7
I agree with many of these things listed!
Another one I see is that women always get the strangest combination cravings and send their husbands out to get food at any time of the day. I had cravings, but they never hit with the intensity that is shown on TV. They were also for things like snow cones, not pickles and peanut butter.
I also remember watching Father of the Bride 2. Near the end of the wife and the daughter’s pregnancies, there was a voice over that said that they each weighed something like 128 lbs and 132 lbs, respectively (somewhere around those numbers). I call shenanigans on that.
Post # 8
@keepsmiling19: OMG, I had the exact same response the last time I watched that movie! Like “Bullcrap – what were they, 90-100lbs pre-pregnancy?” Not buying it.
Post # 9
They don’t put on weight anywhere except their stomach. EDIT: Just realised the last 2 posters sort of said the same thing 🙂
Post # 10
@geeky_bee: I hope Im not repeating..
I don’t have a baby, but my best friend just had a baby. I remember her calling me, and saying “My water broke!” and I was like “Whoa, shouldn’t you be on your way to the hospital???” and she told me that what you see in the movies where the water breaks and everyone rushes to the hospital and the baby is born 15 minutes later is not usually how it happens!
I don’t know anything about babies and childbirth, so I was like… reallly??
Needless to say her baby was born two days later!
Post # 11
All of these myths actually describe my pregnancy! However, my water didn’t break to indicate labor – I was home alone when labor started and got the “Honey, this is it!” moment on the phone when I called him at work.
Post # 12
The labor scenes in movies totally traumatized me!
its all very intense and fast paced and tons of doctors and the woman
screaming and just so chaotic!
Im sure for the sake of the pace of the movie they won’t put a calm staff
giving an epidural but I do find it funny that birth scenes in movies are always
dramatic and over the top.
Post # 13
@keepsmiling19: Totally agree on the cravings. For me, it’s more, I want something salty, or I want something sweet, or I want something savory–not super specific things and never two odd things mixed together. And if I asked my husband to go out at 3 AM and get it for me, he would just keep snoring, lol.
@aussiemum1248: Another one I wish was actually true! 😉
@Ugoob: I know! Granted, I have not spent a lot of time in a maternity ward (yet), but I imagine if you are screaming bloody murder like most women in movies/tv, they probably tell you to try and take it down a notch, heh.
Post # 14
That women wear high heels and cute dresses throughout pregnancy. I don’t know about all of you, but I was in flats and stretchy pants at about 8 weeks…granted I had twins, but still!
My pregnancy was much more like Elizabeth Banks’ character in What to Expect When You’re Expecting. The farting, the sleeplessness, the acne, the cankles, the hormones. It’s really not pretty 🙂
Post # 15
@btothez: Lol, I had one pair of Dr. Scholl’s mocassins to wear for the last 2 months of my prenancy. I couldn’t squeeze my feet into anything else, even extra wide shoes.
Post # 16
can we all take a second to PRAY that we’ll all look as bright-eyed & bushy-tailed after just pushing a human out from between our legs?
how is it that they’re NEVER sweaty/ hair a mess/ etc….?? lucky beotches 😉
… except maybe Knocked Up.. but Katherine Heigel still looked pretty damn good despite how “angry” they made her look!