Post # 1
Any other couples attempting/ attempted to buy a home while planning a wedding?
My mother,brother and FBIL are all going to live with us after the wedding. Instead of renting an apartment or house, we decided to buy a home and start building equity. FH was going to school full-time at the university and working full-time until a few months ago when he graduated. I am still going to the university full-time and working part-time. We put an offer on a home during my finals weekend which was mutually accepted. We were excited, but did not realize our life would become documents to the realtor, loan officer, escrow. Payments to and documents to the venue, caterer, florist, then of course, doing all of this between work and school. We’ve been struggling to not let wedding planning fall to the wayside during all this, but we are getting slightly behind. It has been largely stressful. It has only put minor strain on our relationship in that we have had few date nights and little time to just “hang out” when we aren’t exhausted. Nothing serious though.
Just want to know if any other bees are going through the same thing. Willing to offer support!
Post # 2
Ours is a little different, but everything you said reminded me of our situation! For background, I’m in grad school while my fiance has been working full time in different city, where he owned a house, for about 2 years. This summer, we both moved in together in a third city where I’m interning and he got a transfer with his current job. That meant that in May, I had finals, he put his house on the market, it sold really fast so he was dealing with all the negotiations and paperwork, we moved into a new apartment, and we both started new jobs. Plus wedding planning, of course. Fortunately our wedding is still a ways off, so it could’ve been worse. But sometimes I still wonder how we made it through that without going crazy!
Post # 3
This is why we were engaged for 2 years as opposed to getting married the year after we got engaged. We wanted to save money for the wedding and it just so happened that we found a place to buy and it was a situation where we couldn’t say no to buying because it was perfect and we were approved in buying one.
It’s never an easy process in buying a home. Life was pretty hectic for us for months during the whole deal and omg … am I ever glad it’s over and just enjoying our home.
I was kinda glad though to push off the wedding too though. Weddings are just as expensive and time consuming as buying a house and honestly I preferred having a home at that point in time than having a wedding because you can have a wedding anytime. Buying a home … to have your OWN home and not have to look for one AFTER you’re married is just soooo much better. Once the home deal is done and settled, this will give you the breathing room to start fresh and plan the wedding the way you want to. It’s a sacrifice if you have to push it a bit but you know what? It’s worth it. It’s worth it for your time, money, and sanity.
Post # 4
So nice to know that we are not the only ones crazy enough to buy a home while having so much going on! I am glad we will have a home to move into after the wedding. It is much more important than spending a ton of money on the ceremony! Many people tried to warn us off of doing this, but I hope in the end it will pay off! Congrats on finishing school and the internship!
Post # 5
We have definitely struggled with having the wedding and the homebuying being equally expensive! Our lender was telling us to keep as much cash in the bank as possible, but making sure we pay off our credit cards in full each month. Yikes! We had no idea how we were going to pay off our huge vendor bills! Luckily we had the venue paid off in advance and most of our vendors have been pretty understanding. Thank for the encouraging words. I feel like once the house closes we’ll be able to catch up with the wedding stuff!
Post # 6
We’re looking to buy a home and hoping to have moved before the wedding (11 months ahead). It should be doable. Except for the fact that we haven’t found a suitable home yet, and have been looking for 6 months already. But I know it’s out there.
I’m just kind of afraid it will be too much. Not the financial part, that will be sorted out, but mostly the stress. With two full time jobs, and a wedding to plan, won’t buying a house be too much? Especially if it needs renovating.
We already live together (have been for two years), so no worries there, but I’m mostly worried about the hectic time that is ahead of us once we find a home. Looking forward to having a wonderful place of our own though, as the small apartment we’re currently living in is no longer satisfying for our needs and wishes.
Post # 7
DH and I did exactly this! We placed an offer on our home 3 weeks before the wedding and closed 3 weeks after the wedding. It was crazy and stressful, but so so worth it!
Post # 8
Just take it a day at a time and focus on what needs to be done immediately. My husband and I went through the same thing, got engaged in May while looking for a house, started wedding planning, found a house finally by Aug and closed with 2 days to spare before he had to leave his apartment. We were working full time and taking 2 classes a semester at night (4x a week we had class) including summers to get our engineering masters. And we were also planning a month long dream trip to Austrailia and New Zealand that December. Our wedding was May the following year, the same time we finished school and it was the best feeling ever to finally have that planning done and no more school. *Just* working a full time job felt like such a breeze at that point.
Post # 9
So wanted to do this, but everyone said hold off on the house and concentrate on the wedding, its too stressful to do both at once…..now we are buying a house and growing a baby at once….not sure it’s any less stressful! Ha, ha.
Good luck you will get there in the end and it will be fabulous.
Post # 10
I’m engaged and house buying (hoping to complete next week!) but for this reason, and the money, we aren’t actually wedding planning yet.
Since we’re paying for everything ourselves we’re setting up the house/home for our married life, and then thinking about the wedding. Gives us more time to plan and more time too save up.
Good luck to you though! Stay sane.
Post # 11
We were engaged, building a house, and I was lookign for a new job . Prioritize and also know that most little things at a wedding, the only person that orries about them is you. I ditched the small stuff adn made sure the big thigns were taken care of.
Post # 12
vpittsmd: We did the same thing! We were engaged, I work and go to school full-time and my husband owns his own business. We started looking for houses in October/November and closed on our home in March with the wedding in June. Honestly, the only way I made it through with EVERYTHING was trying to do as much homework/wedding stuff during my work as possible. I have a desk job so it wasn’t too bad trying to do ‘real’ work and personal stuff during the day.
No real advice but wanted to pop in and let you know that you’ll make it. 🙂
Post # 13
I’m sort of in the same situation, just neither FI nor I are in school. We just got engaged a few weeks ago and are just beginning the process of house hunting and wedding planning. FI won’t set a date for the wedding until we have found a house and we are hoping that won’t take more than 3-4 months. We want a fall 2015 wedding so that gives us around a year to plan the wedding. My mom is being super pushy about setting a date now/asap because of booking vendors and things, but FI’s not budging so far.
Post # 14
It is definitely a lot of work, but it seems like you guys have given yourselves plenty of time to do everything which I think is key. Where we struggled the most is that we had a deadline to get the house and get the wedding planned in about 4 months. Not wise! I hope you guys find the perfect home! Keep looking, its out there!
Post # 15
That is excellent advice! It seems so easy to get overwhelmed! I will be glad when everything is done. Once school is finished, wedding done and house closed, I almost wonder what we will focus our energy on after that! ( Probably home renovation) So glad everything worked out for you guys!!!