Home buying while engaged

posted 2 years ago in Home
Post # 2
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Ours is a little different, but everything you said reminded me of our situation! For background, I’m in grad school while my fiance has been working full time in different city, where he owned a house, for about 2 years. This summer, we both moved in together in a third city where I’m interning and he got a transfer with his current job. That meant that in May, I had finals, he put his house on the market, it sold really fast so he was dealing with all the negotiations and paperwork, we moved into a new apartment, and we both started new jobs. Plus wedding planning, of course. Fortunately our wedding is still a ways off, so it could’ve been worse. But sometimes I still wonder how we made it through that without going crazy!

Post # 3
Member
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

This is why we were engaged for 2 years as opposed to getting married the year after we got engaged.  We wanted to save money for the wedding and it just so happened that we found a place to buy and it was a situation where we couldn’t say no to buying because it was perfect and we were approved in buying one. 

It’s never an easy process in buying a home.  Life was pretty hectic for us for months during the whole deal and omg … am I ever glad it’s over and just enjoying our home. 

I was kinda glad though to push off the wedding too though.  Weddings are just as expensive and time consuming as buying a house and honestly I preferred having a home at that point in time than having a wedding because you can have a wedding anytime.  Buying a home … to have your OWN home and not have to look for one AFTER you’re married is just soooo much better.  Once the home deal is done and settled, this will give you the breathing room to start fresh and plan the wedding the way you want to.  It’s a sacrifice if you have to push it a bit but you know what? It’s worth it.  It’s worth it for your time, money, and sanity.

Post # 6
Member
670 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

We’re looking to buy a home and hoping to have moved before the wedding (11 months ahead). It should be doable. Except for the fact that we haven’t found a suitable home yet, and have been looking for 6 months already. But I know it’s out there.

I’m just kind of afraid it will be too much. Not the financial part, that will be sorted out, but mostly the stress. With two full time jobs, and a wedding to plan, won’t buying a house be too much? Especially if it needs renovating.

We already live together (have been for two years), so no worries there, but I’m mostly worried about the hectic time that is ahead of us once we find a home. Looking forward to having a wonderful place of our own though, as the small apartment we’re currently living in is no longer satisfying for our needs and wishes. 

Post # 7
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

DH and I did exactly this! We placed an offer on our home 3 weeks before the wedding and closed 3 weeks after the wedding. It was crazy and stressful, but so so worth it!

Post # 8
Member
13004 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Just take it a day at a time and focus on what needs to be done immediately.  My husband and I went through the same thing, got engaged in May while looking for a house, started wedding planning, found a house finally by Aug and closed with 2 days to spare before he had to leave his apartment.  We were working full time and taking 2 classes a semester at night (4x a week we had class) including summers to get our engineering masters.  And we were also planning a month long dream trip to Austrailia and New Zealand that December.  Our wedding was May the following year, the same time we finished school and it was the best feeling ever to finally have that planning done and no more school.  *Just* working a full time job felt like such a breeze at that point.

Post # 9
Member
852 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

So wanted to do this, but everyone said hold off on the house and concentrate on the wedding, its too stressful to do both at once…..now we are buying a house and growing a baby at once….not sure it’s any less stressful! Ha, ha.

Good luck you will get there in the end and it will be fabulous.

Post # 10
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I’m engaged and house buying (hoping to complete next week!) but for this reason, and the money, we aren’t actually wedding planning yet.

Since we’re paying for everything ourselves we’re setting up the house/home for our married life, and then thinking about the wedding. Gives us more time to plan and more time too save up.

Good luck to you though! Stay sane.

Post # 11
Member
247 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

We were engaged, building a house, and I was lookign for a new job .  Prioritize and also know that most little things at a wedding, the only person that orries about them is you. I ditched the small stuff adn made sure the big thigns were taken care of.

Post # 12
Member
1779 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

vpittsmd:  We did the same thing! We were engaged, I work and go to school full-time and my husband owns his own business. We started looking for houses in October/November and closed on our home in March with the wedding in June. Honestly, the only way I made it through with EVERYTHING was trying to do as much homework/wedding stuff during my work as possible. I have a desk job so it wasn’t too bad trying to do ‘real’ work and personal stuff during the day.

No real advice but wanted to pop in and let you know that you’ll make it. 🙂

Post # 13
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

I’m sort of in the same situation, just neither FI nor I are in school.  We just got engaged a few weeks ago and are just beginning the process of house hunting and wedding planning.  FI won’t set a date for the wedding until we have found a house and we are hoping that won’t take more than 3-4 months.  We want a fall 2015 wedding so that gives us around a year to plan the wedding. My mom is being super pushy about setting a date now/asap because of booking vendors and things, but FI’s not budging so far. 

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