Post # 1
Ever since my very first sleepover in the first grade, I have very bad panic attacks when staying away from home. There are a few places where this does not happen… my best friend’s house, FI’s house, my father’s/grandmother’s… all within an hour of home. However, if I am traveling away from my home (more than an hour), I panic. Whether it’s a 3 hour drive to an amusement park or an 8 hour flight across the country (I do not have any fear of flying, I love it actually) I am homesick and have anxiety attacks, more often than not accompanied by (TMI) diarrhea and stomach aches. I do not like the idea of not being able to excape easily (drive away, usually) from wherever I am.
We are flying to FI’s father’s home for Thanksgiving and really regret having said yes to the invitation. I wish I could be with my family for the holiday, and feel guilty for agreeing to go. However, I feel that it is important for FI to have a relationship with his father since his parents divorced 2 years ago. I am torn. I know that I will feel anxious and get homesick while away, but I think it is a good opportunity to make memories.
I have been to two separate therapists to discuss this issue, and neither was any help at all. (I’m beginning to think therapy is just not for me.) I have also discussed it with my doctor, but not at great lengths. She gave me a prescription for Xanax to help, but I was too nervous to take them, having never taken any drug of the like before.
What do you think I should do about this?
Do you have any coping stratagies for homesickness related anxiety?
Any help is greatly appreciated.
Post # 3
Honestly try the xanax, it might really help.
Post # 4
Whenever I get anxious about things, I tell myself stories in my head to calm myself down. This is mostly at night while trying to sleep.
The other thing I do is tell my husband how I’m feeling. “I feel anxious right now because I am worried that the teacher taking over my classroom is a meth addict.” For example. Talking about your anxiety might help – it helps me see the situation from another perspective.
Can you isolate why it is you get so anxious? Is it a constant feeling of unease, or is it at specific times?
Also I’m from Portsmouth, NH — that’s so close to Southern Maine!
Post # 5
@EmieBee4: I don’t really have any advice, just want to say you’re not alone. This is why I hate vacations. I don’t get panic attacks, I just get really emotional and bitchy cause I just want to go home. It starts to be an anxiety, like I just can’t get home fast enough. It has left me sobbing in the airport over a delayed flight. Slightly embarrassing for a grown woman. Now that I no longer live at home with my parents I get this feeling being at my childhood home. Because it no longer feels like my home. It does seem to help if I keep busy, but even that gets old. Best cure I’ve found is to just go home! lol.
Post # 7
@EmieBee4: Is the anxiety ONLY related to being away from home? I used to have bad anxiety but also IBS. Anytime I was away from home or in a “new” environment, I’d get anxious. To the point where I’d do exactly like you, and start to worry about impending plans.
I’m not big on taking anything…I don’t like the feeling of not being “in control” of my body. Which is what a lot of anxiety comes from…lack of control. For me, I’ve had to work for years on calming myself down when I felt the anxiety coming.
I also LOVED doing acupuncture and it always helped me. I haven’t had to do it in 3 years now but I do miss it. I’ve heard that meditation and yoga help but I never seem to find the time to try it.
Post # 8
@EmieBee4: I totally understand where you are coming from. I get this too. Sometimes I even get it when I’m with my husband. It’s been pretty severe at times. I’ve had a lot of therapy to help me with my anxiety and it’s been so helpful. I took anti-depressants with anti-anxiety in them for a year after the most severe period of anxiety hit. It really helped in conjunction with therapy. I can only say that the thing I do is push through it. Know it’s all in your head, that you’re safe and you can get through it. Hope this helps, even a little x
Post # 9
I’d be careful about diving straight for narcotics, especially if you foersee travelling happening a lot in the future or for long stretches at a time. It is extremely addictive.
I would reccomend doing things like bringing your own pillow or sheets, something to make it feel more like home (my best friend can’t sleep without HER pillow. Not just a fluffy pillow, it has to be her pillow). Try taking over-the-counter medications to sooth the stomach cramps and other issues. If you feel you absolutely need nerve meds, try talking to your doctor- something like Valium may help (the main difference between Valium and Xanax is Valium is meant to be taken for longer periods of time to soothe general anxiety, whereas something like Xanax is meant to treat panic attacks- it’s meant to hit hard and fast. It hitting hard and fast is part of what makes it so addictive, because the effects are quick and potent). Or maybe he’ll prescribe Xanax for moments where it gets overwhelming; it really depends on if you just have episodes of panic or if it’s a general feeling the entire time. I just urge you to be cautious taking narcotics. Both my mom and sister are addicted to them; they aren’t something to play with.
Post # 10
Post # 11
@EmieBee4: You’re welcome to message me if you want to talk more 🙂 x