Post # 1
My family and FIs family live in different areas of my province (Ontario), roughly two hours apart. Also, FI and I recently moved from my hometown to a small town about 45 minutes from his fam.
There will probably be a few more people from my family attending than his. However, my Mom seems convinced that we should have it in my hometown, so that not as many people have to get hotel rooms. I would rather have it in the city FIs family lives or a neighboring town. So that I don’t have to travel two hours home every time I have to meet with a vendor.
Any bees with similar issues? What did you/would you do?
Post # 2
I would get married in your new town, espeshially if you plan to settle there for awhile. It will make logistics easier and your new town will likely become more important to you over time rather than your hometown. I know I have alot of local pride in my town, it’s our home and I wanna get married here so we can show it off to everyone and be able to come back to our wedding spot each year
Post # 3
My bias is for your family’s hometown. All else being equal, IMO it is a very nice thing to do if it means something special to your mom to have you there and if it would make it easier for important guests to attend.
There don’t have to be all that many vendor trips if you are focused and organized.
Post # 4
FutureMrs.Huemiller: I had a similar situation and eventually decided to do what was best/easiest for me and FI, which meant having the wedding where we are currently living (neither his hometown nor mine). My mom was crushed when I told her we weren’t doing it in my hometown but logistically it is just so hard to plan from a distance. Do what your heart tells you, not what everyone else wants 🙂
Post # 5
My parents live about an hour from FH’s parents and we moved about 7 hours away from my parents. We decided to have our wedding in my parent’s town because we knew if we had it in our new town we would have a lot of people decline.
If I were in your situation I would probably base it on the most important guests. Are there people on your mom’s side that you really want there that might not be able to make the trip? What about your FI’s side?
We did all of our vendor meetings when we were home for visits and did the rest over the phone or email. I don’t think it was that much more difficult planning a wedding from a different state.
Post # 6
We are getting married in the town where we lived. My home-town is a 10 hour drive away! My friend got married in our home town last year, but she had to schedule vendor appointments very carefully and have weekends of wedding overload. If it were close by she could work on it more gradually. She also spent a fortune on plane tickets! After we picked our venue, I actually moved out-of-state for a temporary job. Planning from afar is not fun- I picked almost all my vendors through skype and phone interviews and I wouldn’t recommend it. If I were you, I would get married where you live. 2 hours isn’t that far away- your family wouldn’t even need a hotel room.
Post # 7
elw728: I am really leaning towards my FIs town. There a couple other factors that I forgot to mention:
The cost of a venue is a lot more in my hometown, and we are paying for most of the wedding ourselves. Also, FIs Grandma (who is his Mother figure) is 89, doesn’t travel well, so I’d be concerned she wouldn’t come if we had itnfar away. Also, my family is better off financially generally, so they can afford a hotel room for one night.
This sounds like I’ve made up my mind, I just don’t want to diasapoint my wonderful Mom.
Post # 8
FutureMrs.Huemiller: Totally valid points. I’m sure your mother will love and support your decision!
Post # 9
- Wedding: September 2016 - Our Castle
FutureMrs.Huemiller: No matter what it should be where you want it to be and at the conveniance level you are prepared for! My family will all have to travel from 10min to 3-4hrs for my wedding.. Its where i want it to be (My House) and if they want to be there they will come and if they cant or dont want to then they can RSVP there preference.. It the day you marry your man and not your families..