posted 3 years ago in Honeymoons
Post # 3
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@hummingbirdkrista:  A lot of my friends are doing that!  It has worked out well for all of them so far. We are just hoping for cash (we already own 2 fully furnished houses so we dont have a registry) and maybe putting out a “honeymoon fund” jar at the reception for fun 🙂

Post # 4
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

[content moderated – posting for the sole purpose of criticizing, mocking, or otherwise disparaging others’ wedding choices]

Post # 5
7045 posts
Busy Beekeeper

We had a great honeymoon that we were excited about as well.  Which we paid for in full, taking into account how much we coud afford to spend on a vacation. I would never have dreamed of soliciting guests to pay for my vacation any more than I would have thought it appropriate to market for  $$$ toward my photographer, decorations or cover the plate.  

If someone *chooses* to give money that is  different than soliciting for it. 


Post # 6
305 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@hemoncdr:  @weddingmaven:  Registering for gifts is the same as asking for money. You’re asking people to spend money on you, I don’t see how it matters WHAT they’re spending it on.

@hummingbirdkrista:  I had a couple friends use it and were glad they did.

Post # 7
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@hemoncdr:  it may be tacky to you and that is fine.  the people attending our wedding understand why we are doing it and will find it VERY entertaining.

@cml:  fully agree!

Post # 8
428 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@hummingbirdkrista:  You’ll likely get a lot of people coming down pretty hard on both sides of this issue, but if it makes you happy and it feels right to you, go for it, and forget everyone who says your choice is tacky. We are using Traveler’s Joy for our Honeyfund as the last thing in the world I need is more sh*t in my house. 

We have booked and paid all the deposits on our honeymoon. Even if nobody gave money, we could still afford to go, we’d just have to stay in less-nice places. So one way or another we are having a honeymoon and we would love it if our family can help us make those memories. 

So blaze ahead with your idea! Just make sure that you ACTUALLY make reservations and pay deposits so that your family knows that you will 100% use the money for your honeymoon. It would totally stink for them if they found out you used it to pay your electric bill.

Post # 9
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@cml:  +Infinity

I seriously don’t understand what’s so different in asking someone to pay for a $150 China setting or donating $150 for a night’s stay at a hotel or a bottle of wine on vacation.  


My FI and I are doing a honeyfund!  My shower is in a month and one thing I realized is that if you don’t turn off the settings, honeyfund will email you when people give you gifts!  

It seems to be going over really well so far.  My family is huge into travel and know how important it is to me and FI.  

Plus, we can totally afford to go on the honeymoon ourselves (just like we can afford to buy the toaster, wine glasses & blender on our small BBB if we wanted to…)

Post # 10
8455 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

If you would have no problem asking your guests for cash as a gift, then a honeyfund is no different.  Depending on your culture/social cirlces/traditions, this can be viewed as acceptable or tacky, but only you know your guests well enough to make that judgement.

Post # 11
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

My problem with Honeyfund is that the website takes a portion of the money for themselves. As a guest, I am not ok with that. I would rather give the couple a cheque so they get the full amount of the gift than have a website take a cut. If you can find a site that does not take a fee out of every gift than I don’t feel it is any different than a traditional registry for household items.

Post # 12
7045 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@cml:    I did not have a registry, as I don’t like to ask  for gifts in the first place.  Traditionally, a gift registry was just a handy place to keep track of a couple’s patterns in the event that anyone was proactive enough to search it out *for themselves*.  The idea being that one offers hospitality to one’s guests in celebration of a milestone life event such as a wedding with no expectation or sense of entitlement.   I absolutely do see a tremendous difference between a (non-publicized) gift registry and  one that essentially solicits guest to fork over cash. BTW, most honeyfunds will give the cash collected to the couple.  It doesn’t  have to go toward the  honeymoon.  

If a  couple is well off enough that they don’t need household items, then they can certainly afford to save up or pay for their own lifestyle choices, including vacations and honeymoons.  

Post # 13
261 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’ve always had the same question. Don’t the honeyfund (and like sites) just give the couple cash? So, if I’m a guest and I give money towards a “romantic dinner on the beach” for your tropical honeymoon, you’re just getting the cash, and you don’t even necessarily use it for that purpose? Not to mention, most sites take a fee. I guess I just don’t understand the point. It’s probably easier to cut money elsewhere and build your honeymoon into the total cost of your wedding. Any gifts/cash that you might receive would just be a sweet, unexpected bonus.

Post # 14
497 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@hummingbirdkrista Don’t use Honeyfund, I think that their site looks dated and their fees are passed on to guests. We used wanderable.com and it was awesome! You can choose to absorb the fees so the guest gives $60 and won’t know that 2% of that goes towards fees. It’s also soooo much more visually appealing!

On another note, I seriously do not understand how people are calling certain things “tacky”. The bottomline is that a wedding is an event for those closest to you. If those folks talk about you because you asked for cash only or have a honeymoon registry — they probably should not have been invited in the first place.

Lighten up folks. 

Post # 15
10384 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@BlushingBrideNYC:  Honeyfund didn’t charge fees when we used them in 2010. Has that changed? Paypal charges fees for credit card use, but that is standard, and not associated with Honeyfund. If you do a private payment using PayPal, there are no fees.

@hummingbirdkrista:  We used Honeyfund for our registry and the guests love it! Haven’t looked at the newer sites that have cropped up since 2010, though. Don’t listen to the Emily Post Snobs….this is a modern and accepted way of registering.

Post # 16
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013


@FutureMrsLadolcetta:  +100 on both of your posts.

We’re doing a Honeyfund, but also a Macy’s registry with some upgrade items on it. We can more than afford to pay for the honeymoon we plan on taking next spring, and to us it’s great to give people the option of gifting us a fun experience during the trip (a nice dinner, couples massage, etc.)!

We own our own house together, so we don’t need a lot of the items that a traditional registry would have on it.


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