Post # 1
My fiance and I already have most of what we need in our apartment. We are going to Thailand for our honeymoon, so we would love to have money for that. Is there a site that will let us register for honeymoon “stuff” such as snorkeling or whatever?
However, we’re not doing an all-inclusive resort, so I’m not sure how this works. Plus, we kind of just want money to help pay for the wedding as well. Is there a way to register for a honeymoon Web site that lets you also just take out some of the money, instead of using it directly on the thing they “buy” you? That sounds a lot better than telling guests we just want money for honeymoon/wedding costs…
Post # 3
So you want to lie to your guests? That’s not a good idea. If you prefer cash then just have a very small registry (for those who are uncomfortable giving cash) and spread via word of mouth that you are saving up for your HM. People will get the hint that you’d prefer cash.
Post # 4
I think most honeymoon registries just give the couple a check for the total amount, minus fees and such. This is specifically WHY I dislike them though. Let’s say I pay $100 for you to have a nice romantic dinner. Not only do you not actually GET the nice romantic dinner, you don’t even get the full $100 I intended for you to have.
I also own my own home and we have enough “stuff” that I don’t really need any more, however, we are planning to do a traditional registry in order to upgrade some kitchen appliances, stock up on linens, and maybe upgrade some dishes & cookware. We are going to keep it fairly small, but still offer a range of price points, in the hopes that some of our guests will choose to gift us money. We do not, however, have the right or sense of entitlement to dictate not only IF our guests give gifts, but what they choose to give.
Post # 5
We also have most of everything we need for the house. So we’re just not registering at all in hopes for cash to help cover wedding expenses. I think people will get the idea that way or you’ll get more personalized gifts 🙂
Post # 6
I’m using honeyfund. At the end all of the money goes into a paypal account and I believe you just pay a small fee to get it transferred to your bank account. Since it all goes to paypal, technically you can spend the money on whatever you want. Just remember that you don’t want your guests to feel “cheated”.
Post # 7
I think honeymoon registries are rude to begin with, and I honestly wouldn’t contribute to it. I’d write you a check or give cash, but I wouldn’t ddo this via some online website that has fees associated with it. Plus, if I found out you straight up lied about what the money was for, I’d be really angry.
Post # 8
I would just have it spread by word of mouth that you would like money for your honeymoon/future house/etc. We did this for our wedding because we had a house and were about to move across the country so we didn’t need a bunch of stuff to move. I don’t like the fact that you are out a percentage of a gift with a honeymoon registry instead of being out just a postage stamp or time to deliver a check.
Post # 9
I suggest using honeyfund.com That is what my husband and I just used. It worked out pretty well. We also registered for around 20 things incase people were uncomfortable giving cash. Honeyfund doesn’t charge any fees so you get all the money your guests give you. They can choose to pay through paypal, our give you a check our cash directly which is how everyone have us the money. It worked out great, we had enough money for our expensive honeymoon and didn’t get a bunch of stuff we already have out don’t need.
Post # 10
Ditto to some of the other bees on here. We are using Honeyfund, which does not charge you fees. You are only charged fees if you choose to have your Paypal balance transferred to your bank account. They have worked out great for us so far!
Post # 11
I’ve bought several “gifts” for friends using Honeyfund, and I love it. At least I’m giving them something they want, in the case of my friends at least. The last one I did the only options were to just give cash or a check, which threw me since I was expecting to pay online into an account. Maybe it was set up that way?
Anyway, some folks might be uncomfortable contributing to a fund, so maybe register for a few things. Hasn’t been a problem for my friends so far!
Post # 12
My fiance and I are using depositagift.com for our honeymoon registry. That said, I have heard good things about Honeyfund too! Anyway, Deposit a Gift is nice and you get to set up a cute website with all of your information. They have a 7.5% service fee (which is fairly comparable to taxes people would pay on a store bought gift if you think about it) and you can decide if you want the gift giver to have this fee included with the gift they give you or if you want that fee to be taken out of the total amount you earn. It all seems pretty resonable to me and I think it will be interesting to see what happens with this! I’ve already had a few family members mention how cute they think a honeymoon registry is and most people in my group of friends and family don’t seem to take issue with it or consider it rude. Just realize that some people may not like the idea of a honeymoon registry (as is pretty clear on weddingbee threads I’ve seen about this sort of thing).
We also have a few more traditional registries (Target and Macy’s) for those who may not be internet savvy or may prefer to give a traditional wedding type gift. I’d definitely suggest doing a small registry elsewhere too just in case. 🙂 Good luck!
Post # 13
I’m personally not a fan of honeymoon registries and didn’t do one for our wedding. However, if you have all the stuff you need, then your guests will either 1) contribute to a honeymoon registry, 2) give you cash, or 3) buy you something else.
A friend of mine did one of these years ago AND registered at Target, Macy’s, and BB&Beyond. For her bridal shower, someone bought her a swim with the dolphins experience at $150. She was upset that they only got her one so they had to pay for the other one which they didn’t have the money to do. Her honeymoon was in the $10k range to begin with though.
Post # 14
@Erika_Meep: But you know what % is taken out of a check I give you at the wedding? 0. So I don’t think that’s reasonable at all…=/
Post # 15
Marriott has a Honeymoon registry; when you sign up, they send you a “master” gift card (don’t lose it!) and you can add various “things” like a round of golf at their resort, massages, dinner for two, breakfast in bed, room nights, and so forth. Each “thing” is assigned a price, and as guests buy those “things” the value is added to your gift card. It’s all one big bucket and you can spend it as you wish at any Marriott, and it doesn’t even have to be used all in one trip. My fiance and I signed up for a variety of “things” mainly so we would have a wide variety of price ranges— I get free breakfast at Marriotts already (I’m a frequent traveler) so chances are, if someone treats us to breakfast in bed, that money will go towards a room cost, but I don’t feel bad about that, and I’d rather have a $40 choice for folks on tighter budgets than to fill the registry with $100 choices only.
The downside of course is that you can only use these at Marriotts and if you’ve already booked your resort, that’s out, but for others who haven’t made their honeymoon plans, it’s worth looking into.
Hilton does a similar registry but they only have points— if someone wants to spend $25 or $250 on our gift and wants to give Hilton points, they just pick the price level they want and the right number of points is added to our account. We can then redeem those for Hilton nights or “experiences” like massages and wine tastings.
I have seen friends set up paypal accounts asking that, in lieu of gifts, people donate to the couple’s honeymoon fund, but I think you have to be VERY careful with the wording here, and limit your registry to only this choice. It looks tacky if you’re asking for money amongst all the pots and pans and linens. And you absolutely must follow up by sharing your honeymoon photos with those kind enough to donate.
Post # 16
@RunsWithBears: I totally see your point. We may end up moving over to Honeyfund but haven’t decided yet. I did not know that Honeyfund does not take any extra fees out until I read this thread so that’s good to know. 🙂
Also, as a side note, I don’t see the problem with having both a honeymoon registry and a more traditional registry. I guess I figured we were being open by giving people multiple options as far as registries go so I’m a bit confused on how having both would appear tacky. That seems rather odd to me. But I know that honeymoon funds are very controversial on here so I suppose there isn’t a real point in arguing. 😛