Post # 1
Hi Bees! Everyone has been so helpful with ideas that I wanted to throw another one out there.
My fiance and I no longer have grandfathers alive. He was very close to his grandfathers and I was very close to one of mine. His family has had weddings since their passings but my wedding is the first for my family since my grandfather (that I was close to) past away.
I really want to do something special for my grandfather since I was really close to him and honor is as well.
Sadly, my family finds having a seat reserved with their photo or a “remembrace” table creepy and I can’t think of anything else.
Aside from the frame charms on the bounque, what are some things you are doing to honor family members that can’t be with you? Ceremony or reception?
I would love to hear what you are doing!
Post # 3
You can have a candle & a frame with a nice poem or something at the reception.
Post # 4
I have a candle for my grandpa and his abuela. She passed away 20 years ago, him, last week
Post # 5
My grandfather wrote poetry, so we are using one of his poems as a reading.
My sister had a bouquet of roses, one for every honoree that had passed and had the officiant say something like “these flowers are a visual reminder of those who are could only be here in spirit today.”
Instead of just doing those who have passed, you can do a table of wedding photos for all couples that inspire your marriage like grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, and such. It can be both living and deceased.
Post # 6
I saw a great one – reserve a seat, with a little note on it, and a vase, saying “this seat reserved for those that cannot be with us today.” I meant to do it, but we forgot. We did include a prayer for our departed loved ones in the Prayers of the Faithhful (we had a wedding mass).
Post # 7
I lost my gramma… Her favorite flower was classic red roses, so I am having a 1 red rose centrepiece for my parents table at our reception to memorialize her… There will be no other red roses at the wedding at all… I am also wearing my gramma’s pearls (she got married wearing them, my mom got married wearing them and now I will)
Post # 8
I lost my step dad, pretty much my dad. I am adding a charm to my bouquet with his picture on it,
My best friend/MOH lost her grandma and they were very very close. I have an extra charm so I am surprising her with a picture charm on her bouquet as well. She will love it.
Post # 9
@soontobehisbride: That’s a really good idea! My MOH lost her grandmoher so that would be a nice gift for her.
@Makemeamrs: I love this! My grandfather loved sunflowers. Maybe we can find a flower to repersent his grandfathers and do that on family tables. Thanks!!
@Duncan: I didn’t know that could be done! We are having a mass as well. I’ll have to ask our priest. Thanks!
Thanks everyone! These are all very sweet and indearing. We have some great ideas now.
Post # 10
@Milo22: I wrote our prayers of the faithful entirely.
Post # 11
I wore my mum’s jewellery as my something old. I also had a close friend hold a framed photo of her in the front of the crowd so she could ‘watch’ me get married. I had a wallet size photo of her that I put in my bra so she would be close to my heart as well, ha. She was with me all day.
Post # 12
I no longer have living grandparents and my husband’s grandparents were not able to travel to our part of the country for our wedding. We did 3 things:
1) On the programs, we mentioned them. We said “We remember” the ones that have passed, and “We honor” the ones who were unable to attend, but we listed their names
2) I asked my mother and my husbands mother for wedding/family photos before the wedding and framed them as decor. We had some great pics of grandparents when they were young couples, grandparents with us as children, etc.
3) A beautiful lace tablecloth that was my grandmothers was passed down to me by my aunt. We were married under this tablecloth which we used for the chuppah. The rabbi noted this during the ceremony.
There are many small, meaningful ways to incorporate memories of loved ones who have passed. You just have to look for the right opportunities to do so, but they are there!
Post # 13
I think a remembrance table at the reception is a good idea, but leaving a picture or a flower on an empty chair to me would make me really upset during the ceremony and make a happy occasion a less happy one.
I went to a wedding last weekend in which they just made a note in the program. I thought that was sweet without being super tearful.
Post # 14
Both of my grandfathers are passed, and FI and I want all of our cousins involved in the wedding (huge, very close, italian families) in some way. However, I have three older cousins who I could not find a responsibility for. Then I had the idea to have them walk down the aisle at the start of the ceremony with candles, one for each of my grandfathers, and another for all of our other loved ones who have passed. I think it will be a lovely and touching tribute to them. I will also have lockets with their photos on my bouquet.
Post # 15
I painted a small 8×12 canvas that reads “In honor of those we love who could not be with us today.”
I have lost both of my parents and all my grandparents. We have a few of FI’s family that will not be able to travel to our wedding. We wanted to include them all in the one statement.
I had planned to place it on a chair in the ceremony location, but may place it on a table (or ?). We also have a note in our program with names listed of those who have passed.
I want to feel close to my mom that day. But happy close.
Post # 16
I’m wearing a piece of jewelry from each grandmother, but nothing overtly alerting people to what I am doing – I’m not into public displays like that at a wedding. I don’t think it’s wrong when people do it, it just isn’t for me at all.