(Closed) Honourary Bridesmaids?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
5007 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I would just pick a reasonable amount of bridesmaids (IMO that’s no more than 6-7) and invite everyone else to the bachelorette/bridal shower. They will understand, and it’s better than making them second string.

Post # 4
Member
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I think either you make them bridesmaids or you don’t. They can attend your shower/bachelorette and be involved in planning either way. To me this always come off as “I want you to help me plan but you’re not good enough to stand up with me at the wedding”. Maybe not your intention but I wouldn’t be too thrilled.

Post # 5
Member
3001 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@LGenz:  Agreed. I’d be pretty mad if I was asked to be an ‘honorary bridesmaid.’ I’d just add them in. Its only 2 girls.

Post # 6
Member
2702 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Why not ask them to do a reading?

Post # 8
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

All bridesmaids are honorary (it’s not like there’s something legal about being a bridesmaid), so it doesn’t make sense to have honorary bridesmaids.

Post # 10
Member
1936 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Do these girls have any special talents? Can they sing, or do they have a great voice for readings? I went to a wedding where a woman gave a reading in latin. I didn’t understand a word of it, but it was beautiful and very personal.

Post # 11
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Honorary bridesmaids is probably going to result in hurt feelings…that is like saying, you weren’t quite good enough to be my bridesmaid, but I’ll call you one just to make you feel better…

Post # 12
Member
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ever watch the show Say Yes to the Dress Bridesmaids? They had an episode where the bride chose “honorary” bridesmaids, and it was a disaster.

Post # 13
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@vorpalette:  I was thinking about the same thing when I responded!

Post # 14
Member
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

@vorpalette:  me too! Ugh those girls were AWFUL. The “real” bridesmaids didn’t want to wear the same dress as the “honorary” bridesmaids. I wanted to shake the bride.

Post # 15
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

If they are close friends then I’m sure they would understand you having your family involved over your friends. It doesn’t sound like a big problem, I have 3 friends I would have loved to go with as my BP and I have an older sister, my FI only had 3 people he wanted to have stand up with him, so I unfortunately am unable to have 1  of my friends as a BM. My other friend will be understanding that my sister and 2 best friends are going to be my BP.

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