Post # 1
… you to ask for a different one.
Some women take the stance of “I love it because he gae it to me” while others are ok with being blunt and saying “I don’t like it, I want a different setting”
I tend to be of the thinking of “I love it bc he picked it as a gift to me. But I think my line would be that the ring needs to be actual jewelry. I feel like I could learn to love a crazy setting or stone. As long as it was an actual metal (silver, gold, whatever) and so on. I don’t know that I would ACTUALLY be ok with a bent nail…
How about you guys?
Be honest. I am curious to see the responses
Post # 3
The only thing that would really bother me would be a wide band. I don’t find them pleasing to my eye, but even more so I find them uncomfortable.
Post # 4
if it was a colored gemstone, I have my birthstone ring and I love it but I would really dislike any color in my engangment ring. allthough he would never buy the engangment ring without my input that would be MY worst case scenario
Post # 5
- Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID
@freshflowers: If I didn’t completely love it after a few weeks, I’d just tell him. However, that’s not a problem because I designed my ring with him, because neither one of us trusted him to pick out all the tiny details like I did, haha.
Post # 6
@freshflowers: if it was not “the ring” I dreamt of our entire relationship, I wouldve been very upset. FI and I spoke about marriage when we were 18 & 19, waited till we were 25 & 26. After a 7 year wait…. I better get the ring I’ve been dreaming of for almost a decade! We knew early on it was meant to and had picked out a ring after dating only 6 months (seems like a silly teen thing to do, but my ring totally represents our commitment to each other).
Post # 7
If he got me something cluster, yellow gold, or channel set, bulky… I would try to love it but I know I just wouldn’t.
Post # 8
@freshflowers: I’m pretty much exactly in agreement with your criteria. A metal, a gemstone. lol. When we were first talking about engagement, DH was planning on getting me something in silver and a coloured gemstone, something OOAK, artsy, possibly nature-inspired, from Etsy or a craft show or something. Then I accidently came across the perfect vintage ring, which we both agreed would be great for me. It’s 10k gold and teeny weeny diamonds and super budget-friendly. If i hadn’t come across it I totally would have been fine with the original plan of sterling silver and gemstone, though.
The only ring “bad enough” would be literally no ring. I would have been fine with even a plain silver band. It’s just the symbolism I had to have 🙂
Post # 9
When Mr TTR & I exchanged updated LIFE PLANS & TIMELINES near the end of 2011, I told him that I NEEDED to be included in the Ring Hunt. I made this extremely clear to him. He wasn’t that keen… but I told him that I had particular tastes and KNEW that I DID NOT WANT A SOLITAIRE (Classic but not me… as I had already walked down that road)
In his life, as an Encore, a woman being involved in the ring choosing process was totally new to him
But he did respect my opinion, and ending up Proposing “sans ring”… that was ok with me
IF he had been left to his own devices, and bought me a Solitaire (the ONLY vision that he had of an ERing)… I am sure that we would have had a very awkward conversation about how that is something I didn’t want because of the bad memories.
Post # 10
Dh made mine so I would keep anything he gave me. We’ve been going back and forth all week about my ring. He’s the one not happy with it and wants it back so he can remake one. I want to keep it the way it is. I’m not at all sentimental but when he told about taking my ring I started bawling, like ugly bawling, it upset me so much. I shocked us both with my sentiment about it.
Post # 11
@freshflowers: I don’t think any ring is actually a “bad” ring – it largely depends on personal taste. For me, halos are not my thing. A halo is more suited to diamond earrings or a necklace pendant. I know they are all the rage now but I don’t think they look that great overall. It depends on the setting. If my ring had a halo I would be honest and tell FH that I didn’t like it. It’s only fair that he know something like that.
Post # 12
@freshflowers: I wasnt going to comment until I saw what you said about the bent nail! Too funny!! I have had this ring on my mind for the last few weeks and I would rock this as an everyday wedding band since I dont wear my real set to work/while cleaning/gardening/etc.
Post # 13
@sheepandbear: where did you find the bent nail ring? I really like that.
Post # 14
My first ring wasn’t bad at all! It just wasn’t right for me. I still have my original stone we got engaged with though! It’s just in a new setting that is totally “me” and I love it so much!
Post # 15
A ring is just a ring to me – a material posession. Disliking it doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate my DH. My relationship is what’s important.
We picked it out together though so we were both happy! However, if I didn’t like it I wouldn’t beat myself up about it. I would just tell DH and we’d get a different one.
Post # 16
@tksjewelry: That pic is from Cartier and the ring is 2k+ but I know there are cheaper options out there.