- 2 months ago
Just saw that you mentioned you both will be 24 this year, so I assume both 23 now? So I am not at all surprised that your DH is not ready for children. Many men (and women) would not be ready for children at that age.
Honestly, I thought I was ready at that age…because it was more of a biological urging. But we waited a few more years…and I am so thankful for it.
Now, we are 29 and 30. We have done a lot of things, saved up money, matured and our friends are in a similar stage of life as well.
I just found out this week that I am pregnant. I am hoping and praying this one will be a successful pregnancy. We actually decided to start trying last Fall. It was a little bit on a whim, but it was after we had some serious conversations about being ready, having our ducks in a row and setting a few goals. We actually got pregnant on our first try and sadly lost it early. It reaffirmed though that we were really ready for a baby.
I have been truly ready for about the past year. DH has left it up to me to decide when to start trying. I think he felt that way because he is in his 30’s, stable and ready for kids whenever (he actually works with 10-12 year olds, so he is used to children).
For your DH, it will likely take time. It’s impossible for us to know how long…but give him the space and time. I know it will be frustrating, but 24 is very young, especially for men. It’s possible he may not be ready until his late 20’s.
I just know, the worst thing you could do is convince him to have a child before he is ready. While he will likely (and hopefully) step up, he may be a bit resentful. So being patient a little while longer might be frustrating now, but will end up being much better in the end for you, your DH and your future children.