Post # 1
Hi ladies, so I’m a really shy and awkward person, and although I’ve been with my FI for years, I’m really not close to his sister, my FSIL. I’ve been dragging my heels on this, but I’d like for her to be one of my bridesmaids, but I don’t know how to ask her.
I’m fresh out of college and extremely, extremely broke. I wish I could ask her out to dinner or even to grab coffee together and ask her then, but I honestly don’t even have that much money to spend right now on gas (she lives pretty far, so even meeting halfway would be hard) and food or drinks. Even if I could go out with her, I’m afraid it’d be too awkward for me to ask her in person.
I thought about sending her a cute card in the mail asking her to be my bridesmaid, but if I do that it might look too kindergarten-ish.
Would it be appropriate to just call her up and ask her on the phone? I also thought of asking my FI to accompany me to go see her, or asking him to come to dinner with us (the only way I could afford it is if he paid for everything, I’m so ashamed), but should this be between just me and my FSIL?
Any thoughts would be welcome, because my wedding is almost 7 months away (the date on my profile is fake)!
Post # 3
I’d just call her. I asked my bridesmaids by text haha, I don’t think it’s a big deal 🙂
Post # 4
I asked both of mine by phone — I think it’s completely appropriate, and it’ll help you not stress about it.
Post # 5
Yay, thanks! I just didn’t know if it was too casual since we’re not BFFs.
Post # 6
Hmmm you could send a card designed for the occasion like this one. There are other cards, too found here.
Or a phonecall or text works, too haha. I asked my cousins over fb chat since they live in Australia. Everyone else was assumed to be in the wedding so technically I haven’t even asked the rest.
Post # 7
I asked my FSIL to be in my wedding too. Like you we weren’t close, but I wanted family to be in the wedding (I had another SIL and a cousin in the wedding too). We don’t live close by so we called- and my husband (then fiance) helped me ask her to be part of the wedding. He chatted her up a few minutes to see how her kids were etc, and then said “hey, my fiance has a question for you…” She was very flattered and gracious and it worked out great- until she got pregnant and couldn’t make the wedding (I hate it when that happens…) But that’s another story.
Post # 8
@anonybee726: I totally understand! My FSIL and I get along very well, but we’re both shy and I wouldn’t say we’re super close. That said, i knew I wanted her in my wedding so I could try to build up that relationship. I made her a card on http://www.zazzle.com/ – I can’t find it but it was a pic of a bride and a bridesmaid, and it was blank on the inside, so I put this poem:
The day that I marry, our families will blend,
you’ll be my sister and also my friend.
It’d be so very special if you will be,
a part of this day, a bridesmaid for me.
It’s just the beginning, of our brand new life,
as your brother and I, become man and wife.
I don’t think I could’ve said it better myself, and she really liked it, if that helps =)
Post # 9
@CestTresJolie14: Those cards are great, thanks! I’ve seen others before, but they were geared more towards besties or other close friends.
@SQT72: Thank you, that’s a good idea because I didn’t know if I should just jump into it like, “Hey it’s me, _____, wanna be my bridesmaid?” Also, I’ve already had one bridesmaid drop out because she’ll be giving birth like 2 weeks before my wedding (so potentially on the day of, because that’s how it goes sometimes). Yup, hate when that happens, lol.
Post # 10
Asking by phone will not be that bad. I always liked the whole package with card idea to ask a bridesmaid… but if you are honestly that broke…then ask by phone. She might like talking to you too!!!
Post # 11
i did a really cute card for my girls. For some reason i cant get pics to upload but ill try to remember to come back later and post.
Post # 12
Mine were asked by phone (I live 3+ hours away from the entire bridal party).
Post # 13
Just call her. I also asked mine by text.
Post # 14
I got these at hallmark and thought they were adorable! I tend to be kind shy so for me a card was the easist way. I asked my two best friends ( whom i would of been comfortable doing without a card) and my future hubbys 2 sisters( one whom im becoming good friends with, were closer in age, and his lil sister)
PS- The first pic is the inside of the card, and the last is the front. whoops