Post # 1
So I have a dilemma… my fiance is not a very adventurous person but when we do go on trips, he loves every minute of it! The hard part is getting him there.
My dream is go to to Europe for our honeymoon. I’m originally from Europe and I would love for him to experience a different way of living, culture, food, atmosphere, scenery! His response is ‘all we’re going to do is walk around, I want to sit on a beach and just relax’ my response was… Greece has beaches… Spain, Portugal has beaches.. sigh.. he suggested he plans the honeymoon since I ‘took over the wedding plans’… I want to respect his wishes but like I said, he’s not very adventurous and I’m worried!
What to do!
Post # 2
i know you’ve named some European countries with beaches. Maybe do some research and find pictures to show him examples of European beaches? My SO can be a bit travel shy, but it is all about making him comfortable. When we were planning our trip to Europe he thought we would be living in hostels and sharing a bathroom. I don’t mind that lifestyle, but he was nervous. Even though it would have saved us money i found an apartment for us to stay in. I would just find out what about Europe makes him nervous or if he has any reason to not want to go
Post # 3
Eh, I can see his point. Weddings are stupid exhausting and once it’s over, all you are going to want to do is sit and relax and, um, other things. Europe may or may not be a great place to do that. Since I’m not from Europe, I know that when I travel there, I want to see and do as much as I can. I feel guilty if I’m not maximizing my time, taking advantage of the situation, and seeing/doing as much as I possibly can. And while it’s fun, it’s also taxing and far from relaxing.
Now you could try and just pick ONE city with a beach to visit and that might work. Or you can take a cheaper honeymoon to a nearby beach and then do a big Europe vacation for your 1-year anniversary. I’m a very adventerous person (most of my trips involve backpacking) but, IMHO, a honeymoon isn’t a good time for a super adventerous trip. Since you are taking charge of the wedding, I’d let your husband plan a honeymoon.
Post # 4
I agree with RunsWithBears and your FI, since you took over wedding planning and he actually WANTS to plan the honeymoon you should simply let him.
OR, you could sneakily be like “I was thinking about what you said the other day- how I took overplanning our wedding…I guess you’re right but I never meant to do that! How about if you take a bigger part in planning that too?” After he gets involved in that you can be like LETS plan OUR honeymoon and do that with him as well.
Post # 5
- Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island
It sounds like you both have different ideas. He wants to relax and do nothing. You want to explore and go on an adventure. Those are two very different vacations. Honestly, if you plan on taking the honeymoon immediately after the wedding, just go to the beach. We were sooooooo exhausted after our wedding that we pretty much just slept for 2 days. We had a very low-key mini-moon at a local B&B and it was perfect. Then 6 months later, we went on a real trip to Europe for 2 weeks. There’s NO way we would have had fun if we had gone to Europe right after the wedding. So my advice is to plan a relaxing mini-moon and then go on a European vacation 6-12 months later. That way, you both get what you want.
Post # 6
We’re doing Europe because we know we’ll both get bored sitting on a beach for more than a day. I’ve also traveled extensively through other European countries and while there is a lot to do/see and you might get overwhelmed with the options, I wouldn’t really classify it as ‘adventurous’ to take a honeymoon there. If we’re tired then we’ll do more relaxing things like going to restaurants/cafes, and if we have more energy we can do more sightseeing or museums or whatever. And, like you said, there are lots of European cities that also have beaches so you can definitely split your time.
Post # 7
Soon2ElopeBee: I wouldn’t say I took over, I think many girls can relate, I’m excited, I have ideas, and he would never be the one to start researching photographers or venues. That’s what he means when he says ‘took over’. He has imput on every part of the day.
Post # 8
I also see where he’s coming from. After my wedding I couldn’t imagine going on an EU trip. For us when we travel to Europe we want to do and see A LOT. We’re up early every morning going here and there – day trips, sight seeing, walking walling walking.
For our honeymoon we did an all inclusive in Mexico and I do not regret that decision. We relaxed, ate, drank, did some mayan ruins, swam with dolphine, slept in late, breakfast in bed, got a massage, walked on the beach at sunset. It was perfect. We kept our EU trip for the year after the wedding.
Post # 9
Perhaps you can do a low key beach honeymoon and plan for a more adventurous Eurpean trip for your anniversary? Seems like some compromise can be made.
Post # 10
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
We did a weekend in New Orleans after our wedding to relax and then planned the big 2.5 week trip to Europe for our first anniversary. My husband calls them our mini-moon and Mega-Moon respectively.
Post # 11
Good luck! I tried and failed to convince my husband to go to Europe for our honeymoon for that exact reason. He didnt want to site see or go anywhere that he would feel obligated to site see. I mean, if we fly all the way over there and spend all that cash, we’re NOT going to just lay on a European beach when the Carribean or Mexico is so much cheaper to get to and stay. Our compromise was that he got his lazy beach honeymoon (St John) and we go to Europe the following year.
Post # 12
viklovez: I’m with you. But maybe do some relaxing AND some siteseeing?