(Closed) How do I cut down my guest list?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Personally I would only invite people that you know fairly well and that are immediate family that you talk with too, it’s your day not a family reunion! Invite who you are comfortable with, we are inviting people we know well, and family that we know well, other wise they are not getting invited. Just stick to people who you want to share your special day with!

Post # 4
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I would only invite people that you know will be in your life in the next 10+ years, so that excludes coworkers and aquatencies… or think of it this way, if you would invite them to your house and sit down to dinner with them then invite them, if you would never do that then why invite them? I dont know if this make sense but its just my thought process…

Post # 5
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I like it Ashley B!  Cut out the plus ones too.  Limit the guests to only serious relationships.  And cutting out kids can do wonders too.

Post # 6
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I applied the following rules:

If you have not texted/called/fb’ed me in the past 12 months to see how i am, no invite

No ring, no bring +1 policy

ONLY the family whom I talk to on the regular and are nice to me

Parents get 20% of guest list to invite whoever is important to them


Post # 7
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@FranksMama: f you have not texted/called/fb’ed me in the past 12 months to see how i am, no invite.

Honestly, even that is too loose. Seriously, if I invited all the people that emailed or FB’ed me in the past year, I would have invited 100 more people. If distance keeps you and a friend apart, then electronic communication, though frequent, should suffice. Emailing and FB’ing does not make a person a friend.

Post # 8
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

we pared it down to the absolutely most important people in our lives just 60 guests—immediate family, best friends, lifelong friends, 3 cousins plus spouses and 2 aunts and a few local friends with no plus ones unless married or engaged; anything bigger we would not have been able to afford the kind of wedding I had always dreamed of (hubby’s from england so only 6 people flew in so that cut things down right there and he had 2 good friends from NYC he made since he met me)

especially since we paid for everything it was important to keep an eye on the budget; we wound up having  a fabulous wedding at the waldorf-astoria, our guestlist was small enough for us to afford the princess like wedding I always wanted; only our most important family, and enough friends to keep the party going and full blast, everyone who was most important to us was there and that was what counted plus a few extra friends to liven up the dancefloor

if you think of it its only going to be your immediate family and super close friends you really love, everyone else is really extra and should feel privileged to come

95% of our guests are still in our lives and we still see and are in contact with and many of my friends I still see and am in touch with(a few friends dropped out of my life for some reason, life changes) but rule of thumb if you dont see them in your future they dont go on your list


Post # 10
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

To cut our list down we decided only on immediate family and first cousins. Most of our friends are shared so we invited all of them. And voilla 150 guests. Originally over 200 with all the other cousins and more distant relatives.

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