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Since he did the inviting, he should do the paying for the extras. Or maybe his family can help pay for his extra peeps?
Is it an option for your *unwelcome* guests to rotate between other family members after your wedding is over? Maybe stay at his parents house, an aunts house, etc.?
I guess that's a lesson for your husband- you can't invite people and expect them to decline!
Sorry, it does seem like they are taking advantage of you in order to have a week in Hawaii. There's really no reason your husband had to offer for them to stay for an extra week! But I don't know what you do about it now.
How about getting a babysitter for the kids and then they can stay at your house? You could get them pizza and rent some movies. Just because they're in the city, doesn't mean they have to come to your wedding.
As for what to do with everyone for an entire week after your wedding, I have no idea. I can't imagine doing that to anyone and I have no idea how the aunt could think that this was remotely ok. Could they stay somewhere else? What about your parents' place?
I totally get why are not happy that they are staying with you for over a week. That would bother me too, but since your husband already offered, there isn't much you can do. I like posh's idea about rotating them to another house if possible.
Regarding the 2 cousins- I think you just need to let that go. It can't be so expensive that it is worth getting worked up about. If you feel bad about having your parents pay for them, you and your husband should pay for them and let it be.
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My husband's aunt is flying all the way across the country to come to our wedding. She's also bringing her two kids with her. I think they are between the ages of 8-13. I've never met this woman or her kids. My husband hasn't seen her or the kids in like 10 years.
My husband told me that she's very strapped for cash (she's a single mom) and that it's really awesome of her to come all the way out here for our wedding, because it's not something she can really afford. She already bought the plane tickets for her and her two kids.
First reason I'm a bit irked: They are staying at our house. They can't afford a hotel so my husband offered up our house...and they took it. They are coming a few days before the wedding, and staying for like 8 days even after the wedding. At. Our. House. My husband deploys to Afghanistan less than a month after our wedding. I'm a full time student too, so I'm in class for part of the week days. So every minute I'm home, I want to spend with him before he leaves. Just the two of us. But now we have her and her two kids at our house for a week after the wedding. I'm so upset. I just want to spend time with him before he deploys, and also...it's kind of umm..our wedding night..LOL. We're already married so it's not like it's a big deal but still, I would think it's kind of rude to do that. So now my husband and I might have to just get a hotel which is stupid we have to spend money on that when we have a house. (We already live in Hawaii...so we don't even need a honeymoon, plus I don't have time since I'm a full time student) It's just inconvenient.
Second reason I'm irked: My parents aren't made of money, and are really trying hard to afford us a wedding, my grandma is helping them with it too. So my mom stresses to me that everybody on the guest list needs to be someone I REALLY want there. Because it's going to be a lot more per head than she planned to spend. So there aren't going to be young kids at our wedding. I'm young, so I have 18/19 year old friends. But my husband being in the military is inviting some of his higher ups and buddies with kids. All of which we wouldn't even have to tell them that they should get a baby sitter. They wouldn't show up with their small children. So his aunt's two kids I don't even know...and he hasn't even seen them in like 10 years. So I'm kind of annoyed that they are taking up two spots in my limited guest list. And that my parents who are trying so hard to give me a wedding have to pay a bunch of money for these children to eat.
Ugh. I'm not trying to sound like a Beeotch, because I'm not at all. I'm generally very laid back and such a nice person. I'm just having a hard time dealing with the fact that they are staying at my house so close to my husband deploying when I just want to be with him :( And because every dollar in this wedding straps my rents even more. I can't really gripe to my husband because he just tells me he's sorry but they can't afford a hotel and he didn't think she'd bring the kids or take him up on the offer to stay at the house.
I might just be emotional thinking about my husband going to Afghanistan again...but would this irk anyone else?!