How do I handle them?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
42082 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@primepretty:  If you do a search here on WeddingBee, you will see many posts that state the only obligation of the bridal party is to stand beside you on the wedding day.

You can thank them for supporting you on your wedding day and being your friend through the years.

Post # 4
104 posts
Blushing bee

why do they have to help you in the first place

Post # 5
6812 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

Lower your expectations. Most bridal parties suck.

Post # 6
9204 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

@julies1949:  +1000

OP than your bridesmaids for being there for you over the years and standing up with you on your big day. No one is required to help you with crafts and planning besides your FI.

Post # 7
278 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I don’t understand why brides tend to think that their bridal party needs to help them with DIY things. *I* get aggravated doing DIY crap…why would I want my bridal party to have to do it? LOL.

Post # 8
355 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m sorry your bridal party isnt what you dreamed it would be, but you have to remember they have their own lives and could be overlhemed or jealous with all your wedding talk. just think if they are the ones you want in the photos with you, and to be there to share your isale. If you don’t want that, then replace them or just don’t have any. Sadly we have to be practical and realise that weddings are not like the movies. 

Post # 11
278 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@primepretty:  I think a lot of times they just offer to be polite, lol. I know my girls offered too. However, they never really expressed interest afterwards. I don’t really blame them and just made my now DH help. Poor guy, haha.

Post # 12
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Eh, I was just in a bridal party where the MOH was about as useful as a nipple on an elbow and the other 2 BMs were not much fun either. The bride didn’t seem to mind because she was low maint. and did most things herself–she selected her bridal party b/c of personal relationships and not for what work she could get of us. Actions speak louder than words, and if you wanted help crafting or planning, you probably should have asked your Pinterest maven and party planning diva friends to be BMs instead of old friends. Thank anyone that was helpful. Nobody enjoys long speeches at weddings anyway, so you don’t need to spend time cataloging each contribution that was made.

Post # 15
1793 posts
Buzzing bee

Why is it that guys are always let off the hook with the DIY stuff but there are such high expectations of the BM’s to help with it?  IMO, it is the groom’s responsibility to help with that stuff far ahead BMs.  

Nipple on an elbow…adding that one to my repertoire.

Post # 16
3084 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@primepretty:  Don’t bothering complain about stuff like that on here. Hardly anyone will agree with you and you will be chided for feeling the way that you do. It’s not worth it.


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