(Closed) How do I stop this feeling of guilt?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1537 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Your their daughter and of course they love you…that’s why they want to help! I felt guilty at first as well, but then my dad said “it’s the only wedding you’re getting so we better make it good.” I thought that was sort of a funny comment, but now that we’re farther down the road I can see that my parents are sort of right. I don’t plan on ever marrying again (even if, god forbid, FI and I spilt), so I want this to be a once and a lifetime special occasion. My FI and I would not have been able to afford such a wedding without the help of my parents. Maybe we’re a little traditional, but my parents also see it as a sending off of their little girl to make her own family so they don’t mind at all because it’s such an important thing. A good wedding is a good omen for the start of the rest of your life with your man.

When I start feeling guilty I try to remember that this is one of the most special gifts my parents could ever give me. They want my marriage to start right and so they are showing their support 100% and not minding one bit. I’m sure if it was anything else they wouldn’t feel the same way.

Just focus on the positive now, especially since you are so close, and enjoy!!

Post # 4
Member
1872 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

Haven’t you ever really really really wanted to give something to someone you love just because you love them so much?

Chances are your parents really want to do this for you and they’re happy to do so.

Honor them by accepting it as a gift and letting them see the joy on your face that it has brought you. I’m not saying you can’t be stressed, but on the big day, DO enjoy yourself!

Post # 5
Member
6998 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

i had a hard time with this too and i would express it to my girlfriend/coworker alot…her advice was “just let them do it, they knew this time would come eventually” and somehow it kind of helped.

Every girl deserves to have her perfect wedding day, we should be blessed that we have parents that are willing to help.

I bought my parents a weekend at this exclusive B&B in Charleston, SC it cost me about $500. They love charleston and go often but always stay at the mariott with my dad rewards points so i figure this was a good surprised and my gift for them for being so patient with me first of all through all my indecisiveness as well as financially helping FI and I with the wedding.

 

 

Post # 6
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I agree with the other ladies. I think they are showing your how happy they are for you and it is a gift they are more than pleased to give.

I think the best thing you can do to show them how much you appreciate their generous gift is to love every second of this journey and enjoy your special day without an inkling of guilt. Your smiles, tears and love on your wedding day will be more than enough for them.

 

 

Post # 9
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I agree with these ladies … and I do feel like this someday and not so much on other days.  I keep trying to cut down on a lot of things and that seems to work …

 

But, I must say – the one thing that we can do is to be grateful, let them know how much you appreciate their money and their help and that you love them very much AND to do the same for our children/daughter someday – that’s kinda how I justify it ha! Hopefully God willing we will be able to do the same and provide our daughters with the same support!

 

Good luck and enjoy your wedding day!!!

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