(Closed) how do u tell coworkers not invite them?

posted 9 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Well for me… we invited a few co-workers… By sheer friggin secrecy. If they couldn’t keep it secret so help me LORD I was going to give them the "mal ojo" if you know what I mean. ๐Ÿ˜‰ 

It’s like an all or nothing thing. But some co-workers really make life good, and you want them to share in your day.

So either you invite them in secret– and then spill the beans to the rest of your work crew later (after the fact)… or you don’t invite them and mumble off and on "gosh we are going to have a really small wedding… I don’t know if we can stretch out our finances to accommodate for more people…" and leave it at that.

Other posts around the boards have eluded to having a separate celebration once you return, a gathering where the co-workers are invited. Which is an option if you prefer/like.

Post # 4
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve only invited two co-workers to my wedding.  I may invite two more because I really like them, but I’ve told them not to tell others because I can’t afford to have everyone at my wedding (unless of course I was a millionaire).  I’ve just told everyone that I have a small wedding with about 50-60 people, all of which are close friends and family and I wish I could have invited them but I just don’t have the funds to do so.

One girl I used to go to school with had the same issue.  So she decided to have a big party the day before the wedding and invite all her friends from work to celebrate with tacos and drinks.  She hired a guy that does street tacos to do them just like they do in Mexico and it turned out to be an amazing hit.

Post # 5
Member
409 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

My FI is wating until the wedding gets closer then is only inviting people he directly works with on a daily base.  So far we had to add 20 people to this list. : (

Post # 6
Member
484 posts
Helper bee

I only invited a few and told them as a group that they were the only ones invited, and please don’t discuss it in front of other co-workers so there aren’t any hurt feelings.

Post # 7
Member
898 posts
Busy bee

There are two coworkers that I feel should be invited….mostly because they are my sounding board for planning. Since they’re really aware of my budget and ideas, they understand that if I can’t afford to invite them. But, I also informed them that if they recieve an invite, it BETTER NOT make it’s way to the office!

Just be very honest with everyone. Let the ones who expect an invite know that it wouldn’t be fair to only invite them, and that you can’t possibly invite everyone. If that’s not good enough, then let them get upset. It’s your day, and you probably have to cope with enough requests from outside sources!

Post # 8
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Just invite the ones you like, not all. I agree on the secrecy thing too. And I think if you’re not inviting them, most will not take it badly–inviting coworkers is a grey zone anyways, and they know that you’re not that close to them in the first place. If they take it badly, that’s too bad. I think one thing I learned throughout the wedding planning process was to have really really tough shoulders!

Post # 9
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Both my FH and I are inviting only some of our co-workers to the wedding.  We both work with too many people to invite all. I have told each of the persons that I was not able to invite EVERYONE so please don’t discuss it around others. I have let them know who is invited, in case they want to coordinate travel arrangements.

Post # 10
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I didn’t invite any.  And this is on the destination wedding board – most likely you can’t get the same time off as your coworkers, anyway! ๐Ÿ˜›

Post # 11
Member
94 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I invited a few co-workers but only the ones where I do things/hang out with outside of work.  Most of my co-workers are much older than me and I don’t think they really expected to be invited.  If you want to invited a few of the ones you like, do it.  Ask them not to talk about it… and if other co-workers ask about it, just let them know that your guest list is limited due to financial reasons. 

Post # 12
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

i work in 2 different offices, so if i invited everyone it would have to be 30 people, PLUS all their spouses/kids!  i am only inviting my boss and 2 coworkers.  i feel bad because i love everyone there and would love to invite everyone but we cannot afford that many extra people.  what makes it worse is i think both offices are planning to throw me a shower.  one office was even joking about having a bacholerrette party for me!  i hope they don’t because it would only make me feel guiltier.

Post # 13
Member
349 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

Yeah I know how that feels! Prior to my wedding I didn’t really want to talk about it in the office because of this reason. When words finally got out, I just told them that I’m having a small intimate destination wedding in Cancun.

I actually did invite a few coworkers because we became close friends over there years (been at the same company for 7 yrs). There’s one girl that I was debating back and forth if I should invite but I ended up not inviting (I still feel kind of bad about it). I had to ask the ones invited to not talk about the wedding in the office.

Post # 14
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I love almost all of my co-workers but we’re not so close that I would call them "friends"..and I only want the closest friends at my wedding. But there are 2 that I’d like to invite..but then I don’t know what the others will think if I don’t invite them. ๐Ÿ™ Gotta talk to my fiance about that. If money and space wouldn’t limit us, I’d invite everyone ๐Ÿ˜‰

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