Post # 1
Just a vent/seeking advice. DH and I were TTCing, but some major changes in his job came up and we are putting the breaks on it for a while. We may wait another year or two (eek).
But I just feel really focused on the idea of becoming a mother. I am not obsessed or anything, I just feel this strong desire that I am ready and want to move forward. DH and I have discussed this extensively and we both agree it is best to wait until things get sorted out. So my rationale, logical brain is telling me that we need to wait. But my emotional side just won’t back off.
I keep myself busy because I work 50 hours a week, I volunteer 3 hours each week and I hang out with friends and my DH. But it doesn’t seem to help all that much. I still have a deep sense of desire to TTC now.
For those who are waiting to TTC, what are your strategies for distracting yourself?
Post # 2
Oh my goodness, I wish I could help but I can’t! I’ve had serious baby fever since the start of this year, but we’re also going to wait another couple of years to TTC for work/financial reasons. It feels so far away still that I don’t even feel I can join the ‘waiting to try’ threads yet…
I tried just ignoring it completely but that didn’t really work, even when I was keeping busy with office/friends/family/DH. I found charting quite helpful for a while so I could start to get to know my body better. It was really interesting at the beginning (I guess I was pretty clueless about how the female body worked), but to be honest now I’ve got the hang of it all and the novelty has worn off, I’m a bit bored of it!
Post # 3
Travel! I had to wait a year and half for DH to get on board. In that time we went to Peru, Italy and Switzerland. Planning the trip and looking forward to it was great distraction.
Post # 4
pinkshoes: We are travelling quite a bit. We went on three cruises and are planning a trip for Christmas. We are also saving up for a trip to Europe. So that does keep me motivated in the sense it will be easier to travel without children.
Post # 5
A good way to do that is to look at your bank account and how much money you have in it. Then take your total amount, and subtract that total amount from itself. The result should be $0. That’s usually the amount of money people have after they have kids. That should be a good way to distract yourself.
Another good way to distract yourself would be to stand in a room full of screaming 7 year olds who have just consumed bags of of halloween candy or something similar. That’s another good distraction.
Post # 6
Im getting baby fever now too, just this afternoon I strolled through the baby clothes, just enjoying the tiny little sweet clothes. My husband and I need to wait at least another year due to our living situations. Im thinking of making myself a bucket list pre-baby. We deffiantely are trying to go to europe next spring. Ill have to think of other things to put on that list.
Post # 7
annonbee857: Baby fever big time over here…me and DH both. We are on our 5th month TTC and are filling our days with house projects and hanging out with friends and family, playing with our puppies, and some little trips here and there…nothing extravagant but it’s fun.
Post # 8
You can come and baby sit mine!!! They are The most adorable but effective birth control ever.
Post # 9
- Wedding: August 2008 - Toronto, ON
My DH and I are TTC right now, we’ve been trying since late Feb but some months we don’t always do it as much as I would like during my FW because of DH’s work schedule but anyway I enjoy dressing up and going out to dinner, going to movies, hanging out with friends, shopping, taking care of my furbaby (cat) until hopefully one day we are blessed with a real baby.
Post # 10
Our bank account keeps me distracted
We are not in the right financial position so that makes things a little easier, because we just can’t afford it. We wanted to try this time next year, but are now planning on adopting a third dog with a special situation so that will also push it back a little more. Which we’re okay with. Dogs are our kids right now!
A PP mentioned a pre-baby bucket list and that’s also something that helps. There’s lots of things we want to do before a baby is in the picture.
Post # 11
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
annonbee857: Oh my gosh I totally understand!! I would have loved to start ttc this ChristmS but we’ve ended up having to move and even live separately for a while because of work!! 🙁 Thankfully I have a 2-week holiday coming up and changing jobs in March should help… but I am sooo ready it’s agony to wait 🙁
Post # 12
annonbee857: we are waiting another few years to start trying for a baby but there are some days where I just have such an urge to become a mother. I voice my desires when those days happen and my husband distracts me by making me a margarita…. or 5
Post # 13
Vitana: You are too funny!! I’m dying!!! This is a VERY effective method OP!!
Post # 14
Looking at our bank account is a big one. Daycare costs are crazy here in upstate NY. Also the spur of the moment stuff we like to do. Like just decide to go out to eat or catch a movie. When we have kids that will not be a option.
Post # 15
I’m with ya there. Everyone I know is either pregnant, has kids. We’ve been married almost seven months but the pull of yearning to be a mother is hard. We’re really struggling financially so until we get that settled we have to wait. But the desire will always be there for me.