Post # 1
A friend of mine is getting married on Christmas day this year. I’m having a tough time deciding on if we are going to go or not. I have lots of family that come in that I only get to see at Christmas and we always have our big Christmas Day dinner. This will also be the first year FI gets to spend Christmas with us.
On the other hand, this person is a dear friend and I would hate to miss her wedding, but at the same time I’m annoyed that it’s on Christmas Day.
She is already expressing her displeasure in some people who aren’t attending, but I don’t think it’s fair that she expects people to give up their whole Christmas day. I don’t know. I feel like this for other holidays as well.
How do you feel about holiday weddings? Would you just skip tradition for a year to attend the wedding?
Post # 3
She didnt think of that?!?! Omgosh! I was thinking of a Black Friday, but girls here shared their feelings about it and most were not happy! lol!
So we did the week before Christmas!
No offense but what a DING-BAT to think she would have a FULL wedding! Besides immediate family who is really going to be able to do that?!
Post # 4
A wedding around the holidays is one thing…. a wedding on Christmas is another animal. I would never attend a wedding on Christmas day. It’s your friends wedding and it’s her choice to have it whenever she wants. But she has no right to be upset with people who chose not to give up a very special holiday for her.
Post # 5
- Wedding: December 2010 - University of Toronto Faculty Club
I’m having a Christmas-y wedding, but it would never have occured to me to have it on Christmas, since all my guests celebrate Christmas and I think it would be unreasonable for me to expect anyone to skip their usual traditions to attend my wedding. I would personally not be thrilled about attending a wedding on Christmas.
Christmas is probably the only holiday that for me this would be a big deal. I’d definitely be into a attending a New Years wedding, I think that would be a lot of fun!
Post # 6
NYE I can understand and would be happy to go, some of the less family holidays where you get a long weekend – like labor day – also would be fine with.
Christmas, Thanksgiving, to a lesser extent fourth of July I’d be bummed. Most Christmas weddings (and maybe even Christmas eve) I would not attend unless they were very close family or friends.
Post # 7
Depends on the holiday.
Christmas, I’d feel that was a little inconsiderate. Unless maybe the couple and the majority of those they are inviting do not celebrate Christmas.
New Years Eve/New Years day – that’s kind of a cool time to have a wedding. Very festive atmosphere and a neat I idea to start the new year as husband and wife.
I don’t think I could “skip Christmas” even one year. Christmas and Thanksgiving are too holidays that are very special to me, my family, and FI’s family.
Holiday’s I would be fine going to a wedding on:
NYE/New Years Day
4th of July
Valentine’s Day (although that might be uncomfortable for any single people invited)
Easter (never really celebrated it much)
Post # 8
Is there a specific reason she chose Christmas? I hope it’s not just because it lands on a Saturday this year…. Personally it would depend on the year and what potential plans would be with my family. It varies from year to year. In the past I’ve spent it by myself but others have been big get-togethers for family that lives long distance.
Post # 9
I would understand if people couldn’t come. I feel that certain holidays will cause people not to go to a wedding (ie Christmas). With that said, my wedding is on NYD, and I still have over 400 guests that RSVPed yes (with a few RSVP outstanding). I was very surprised. I was expecting less because it is on a holiday (we were prepared for about 400).
Post # 10
Well she said she did it because it was on a Saturday and her dream venue offered a huge discount because no one had booked it. I could maybe attend if it were New Years, but then again I would want to spend that moment at midnight in private with FI.
Post # 11
I suppose I sort of get the idea of “oh well the whole family is going to be together on Christmas anyway, so why not go ahead and have the wedding that day”
But for all of the people who aren’t family, it is really unfair to expect those people to give up spending time with family on a holiday to attend a wedding.
I wouldn’t have a wedding on any holiday, honestly. I feel like it is presuming that is how your guests want to spend that holiday (like New Year’s Eve).
Post # 12
We chose not to do any sort of holiday/long weekend wedding just to avoid the fact that some people would not be able to/would choose not to come. I’m one of those people, so I get it.
Holiday weddings don’t bother me, but I wouldn’t personally have one because I know I value those precious 3 day vacas that come along rarely and giving up our family vacations to attend a 1 day event is tough to do for me. It’s just my opinion, I don’t think poorly of those who do holiday weddings, but I think the couple needs to realize their guest list may get drastically smaller (especially on family/religious holidays like Christmas).
Post # 13
@Miss Tattoo: Well of COURSE they offered a huge discount. If it’s what she really wants, then great. But she has no right to gripe over people not coming and choosing their family traditions instead.
Post # 14
I would not attend a Christmas wedding. I feel bad that a lot of people will miss out on her wedding, but come on girl it’s Christmas.
Also I feel really really bad for the people who have to work for her wedding, the caterers employees, the DJ, the venue employees, the limo driver. None of those people get to spend Christmas day with their families.
If you are getting upset over not going, maybe you can go to Christmas dinner with your family earlier and then show up a little bit later for the reception.
Post # 15
- Wedding: May 2011 - Bartram's Garden
My aunt and uncle got married on Christmas, years before I was born. Our whole family and most of their friends were Jewish, so it wasn’t an issue.
I’d feel bad for the catering staff who had to work on Christmas, though.
Post # 16
If it were an evening wedding, I would have no problem with it. You’d still get Christmas morning to open presents/spend with family. If it were me, i’d do a big family brunch instead of dinner and then still go to the wedding, especially if it were a good friend. Totally understand why people would be put off a bit, though!