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Hey bees!
I've decided that as much as I LOVE my wedding gown and love the thought of keeping it for sentimental reasons and passing it down to my children and so on (not concerned about it being worn again but I just love the idea of keeping it in the family), I have to sell it because we really need the money :( We went waaaaaay over budget and my dress will really help with recooping some of the costs.
It's really breaking my heart but I know that it's practical and it's for our family. I'm keeping the matching veil but still, it just makes me so sad to think that I'll never have my wedding gown or be able to look at it or pass it down to my children and grandchildren. I know I'll have pictures and video but it still hurts. I do feel good about the fact that I'll be helping out my family and like I said, I know it's very practical.
How did you get past the heartbreak with selling your gown? What're y'all's opinions on selling vs. keeping? I guess I just need some uplifting and that I'm not the only bride that's had to do this, it just is so sad.
Here's a pic of me when I first bought it, I was so excited! I had been lusting over it for months and she turned out to be the one!
i will be selling mine or donating it if doesn't sell i just don't have the emotional attachment, im very practical and i dont have the room nor the willngness to pay money to store it. dont get me wrong i think my dress is beautiful but im the kinda person that doesnt like clutter and ultimately i know that it will end up being that and i will just forget it is stored in my garage
By the way your dress is beautiful!!
Oh my-- you look gorgeous! Love the dress! And I voted to sell it because I don't plan on having children and also to recoup some money. I also really love the idea that another bride can get a dress that she maybe couldn't afford brand new. (I haven't even gotten my dress yet, but I do plan to sell it after the wedding._
Your dress is beautiful. Mine's not by a famous designer (and it actually tore slightly on my wedding day), so there's no point in trying to sell it. But I loved the dress, and everyone said I looked so beautiful in it, so I think I have to keep it. It's a corset back, so maybe I'll still be able to squeeze it on in the future, to show my kids and stuff. I don't know, but since it's not worth much, I don't feel too bad about keeping it.
@MAGENTA0724: That is very true, it does just go in a box to be stored. I love the idea about you donating, that's so generous! Thank you for the compliment, she is gorgeous :)
@LittleDee27: Aww thank you! I can't wait to wear it! That's also another really good point that actually does make me feel a teensy better. I love the thought of another bride loving my gown as much as I do and getting the chance to wear it. I would love to make another girl happy if I can't keep her.
@Miss OBG: That's exactly why I originally chose to keep it and why it's hard for me to let her go, I would love to pull it out one day for myself or to show my children. Practical vs. my heart strings lol. And it doesn't matter what your gown costs, it's your wedding gown and I'm sure you did look beautiful :)
Mine probably wouldn't sell for much, so that's how I justify keeping it. I just love it too much!
Look at it this way, you got to wear your dream dress for your special day that everyone will remember! You made memories and a new life in a very beautiful dress that has the pictures and video of. That sounds better in my book then buying a inexpensive dress that you wouldn't have been happy with at all, then you'd have a whole new set of problems.
I am honestly so sentimental and love keeping things that have sentimental value. However, we plan to start trying for a baby straight away after the wedding and the extra money would be soooo useful I'm sure. It makes me very sad- but I think sometimes you have to be practical for the greater good! It makes me even sadder that I won't have a veil to keep as I'm using my FSIL's veil as my something borrowed. I totally feel your pain here but just think of what you could do with the money. Plus you'll always have the photos- even more reason to splash out on great a photographer!
I don't keep many things, I hate clutter....but I just can't sell mine. For some reason I am too attached to it. Mine wouldn't sell for much because it only cost $500. But I think you are doing a very good thing trying to help cover some of the costs.
I feel great about selling my dress, but to be honest it's not that expensive to start with so I won't get much out of it. I don't plan on having children so no need to keep it as an heirloom. I'll probably try to sell it and see what happens.
i plan on selling or donating mine. I don't see the point of keeping something that won't be useful. Plus something like that would take up a lot of room that I just don't have. Plus, I'd love to sell for a deep discount or donate it so that another bride on a budget can have a beautiful dress.
I havent decided yet. Its clean and in the box, but I just havent gotten around to selling it if I decide to do that.
Could never sell my dresses...ever. I am planning on making them, so they are really going to be my labors of love, not just something I bought.
A Lazaro from Bridals by Lori? Both the dress and the background look familiar. You look beautiful-good luck next week!
I am keeping mine. First, I am very sentimental. Second, I am very short so I might have a hard time selling something that was heavily altered. Third, mine is an Anne Barge and to me, that is an heirloom. I highly doubt anyone would ever wear it as is, but perhaps someone it could be made into a christening gown, parts used for someone else's wedding dress, etc.
If you really can't afford to keep it, don't fret about it. You will have video, pictures and memories. Someone else is going to have a dress they might not otherwise be able to afford.
I was adamant I was selling mine.
My Mother however, threw a fit! It has now been cleaned and placed into a presentation box and she has it!
It is kinda nice to have it for the future, however I also would have loved some of the $2000 back :/
I'm definitely keeping mine, I absolutely LOVED my dress and couldn't imagine selling it. I want to keep it in the family and I hope that my future daughter or even future daughter in law if I have one would want to wear it, but even if that wasn't the case I still want to keep it. It was too beautiful!
As a bride that is planning on buying a consignment gown I say "Thank you to the brides that sell your dress!" I am a true Taurus that loves the finer things in life but am frugal enough to know spending ten grand on a dress is something I could not do. I fully plan on wearing a once-wed or new dress(do you know how many brides buy two weddings dresses and only wear one?!) No sense in a new dress for me!
I am selling mind eventually. The way i figure is that if I have a daughter, the chances of my dress still being in any sort of style is slim and if she really really really wants it, she can have one made.
No use in storing something and taking up room when I can get some good moooolah out of it :)
I'm keeping mine, BUT mine was from a China eBay store and is REALLY unique in color and design and style. Plus, I can always wear it again to other uber-formal events! (or whenever I beg/plead/blackmail/coax my FI into a "night on the town" where we're dressed to the nines, hehehehehe). It does NOT look like a traditional wedding gown, so I can get away with it ;)
I also have a vintage wedding gown I was gonna have altered for bridal photos, but the last time I put it on, wellll.... I don't even FEEL like a bride in it! So, I'll probably end up getting it preserved for my daughter, who currently loves it (she'll be five next weekend, so who knows WHAT she'll want whenever she gets married! LOL)
I'm keeping mine. I just can't imagine parting with it, haha. And I know my daughter will probably never wear it, but I remember how much fun I had looking at my mom's wedding dress when I was little, and I even thought of altering hers and wearing it, but it was a little too small. I just want my daughter (if I have one) to be able to touch it and try it on one day...but I'm pretty sentimental like that :)
I'm not keeping mine. I don't want to pay extra money to clean it and place it in a box that will forever sit in a closet or attic. A lot of dresses today are trendy and I doubt children 20 or 30 years from now will want anything to do with pick ups, one shoulders straps, and whatever else is trendy right now. I figure I can get some costs back and also help another bride who may want it, but can't afford it at full cost. Making someone else happy and helping them have one of the best days of their lives is more rewarding than looking at it in a closet every day.
Its so georgous!!! You would have no problem finding a buyer. Post a link if you do decide to sell it.
Thankfully mine wasn't too bad. It was only $200. I'm one of those centimental nut jobs who keeps everything. I know my kids will probably think my dress looks retarded as it has everything that people seem to hate already (pickups, one shoulder, and it has gold and not silver detailing) but I am keeping it anyway.
Onto yours though, I understand budget is a concern and the sentimental attachment is hard to get over but think of it like you are doing something very kind. You are giving someone an opportunity to have a dress they may not otherwise be able to afford and a crazy gorgeous dress at that. You will always have memories of getting to wear your dream dress as well. Not many people even get the opportunity to wear the dress of their dreams and not only do you get to but are giving someone else a chance at the same happiness.
I doubt mine will store well and will probably fall apart in a box, but here she is I just can't part with it:
I've never been emotionally attached to things. Songs do it for me and I could look at photography all day long. But a dress...not so much.
So, I'll be selling mine.
If you keep, spring for the very, very best preservation possible. When we unearthed my mother's wedding gown and veil, a few areas of lace had yellowed. The veil my grandmother bought in Ireland, on the other hand, is still white. I have to imagine there was a difference in how they were preserved and packed.
While I love my dress, I'm not really emotionally attached to it (yet, who knows how I'll feel after the wedding). I paid more than I was hoping to so if I can find someone who's interested, I'll sell it. I'll never wear it again and by the time my future children are grown, I'm sure it will be horribly out of style.
I'm keeping mine~not because I think any one else might wear it, but because my mom and grandma still have their gowns, and it's neat to see how styles change. Plus I'm only 5'1" and had the dress hemmed wearing 2 inch heels, so my dress is short and there likely won't be a lot of interest in it. Who knows, maybe I'll wear it for our first anniversary, just for fun. :)
@mrsmurraytobe: I'm about as sentimental and emotional as they come and after reading your post I needed to share my thoughts. I'm elated to get married in October to my hunny. This is my 2nd marriage, his 3rd (yikes!!!) and after my divorce I donated my dress. I had thoughts of keeping my dress but why? For who? For me to know it's in the closet? After I get married I'm going to sell my dress and for as much as I LOVE and I mean LOVE her I would rather have another happy bride enjoy her as well. Plus the $$$ would be helpful.
What if I DID keep her and when my granddaughter is grown I'm excited to share the dress with her only to have her say... "Oh, it's nice". What? Don't you love her as much as I do? I would be disapointed but most of all think about all the closet room I could have had over the years for shoes, shoes and more shoes!!!
You look so~~~beautiful in it !!!
I will keep mine and wish to pass it on to my daughter...but if my wedding went over budget, I might sell it as well...
I'd like to chime in another thank you to the brides who sell-- I'm hoping for a used dress to save a little money, but then on the opposite side of the spectrum, I'll probably want to keep it afterward! I'm awful at throwing away anything remotely sentimental-- ticket stubs, birthday cards, I have a whole box of them!
Bees, thank you SO MUCH for your opinions and comments!
Like a lot you lovely bees, my wish was always to keep it and for alllllll the reasons that y'all have said. I'm a very sentimental person and keep all kinds of special momentos and plus, I mean it's my wedding gown :) I am so in love with it and it's just so special. I would love to keep it for myself and my children/family.
However, I think since it's a decision that's been made for all the right reasons and at this point I'm not going back on it, I feel like I am starting to accept the idea of letting her go (ha does this sound like I'm letting go of a dying family member or breaking up with a boyfriend?). Also, all of your uplifting comments have really helped, too. Although they mean well, my family and especially the men, just don't understand what it means for me to sell my dress and to get this kind of support just isn't going to happen. And that's why I came to the hive and why I love all of you bees!
I do love the fact that I will be helping my family with the wedding finances because it's partly my fault and I want to help, I feel it's just my family responsibility. I'm still pursuing my degrees in school and this is what I can do to contribute and help.
More than that, though, I absolutely LOVE the idea of another bride getting a chance to wear her and hopefully feel the way I do about her. I love the idea of another bride loving her and wearing my dream dress that I am going to marry the love of my life in to marry the love of theirs. I love the idea that another bride will feel as glamorous and beautiful (and I never say that about myself) in it as I do even just from fittings and how I'm sure I'll feel on my wedding day.
Again, thank you for your support, it really means a lot and has helped me to feel better about how I feel about my dress and how to feel about selling her. I will pst pictures and recaps for sure after this Saturday! I can't wait to wear my dress!
@USAandKSA: Right now, my dress is only listed here on WeddingBee in the classifieds but here's the link: http://classifieds.weddingbee.com/topic/presale-lazaro-3819. I am open to offers! I also want to list it on preownedweddingdresses.com. Does anyone have experience with that one, whether through buying or selling?
@Georgia Bee: Yes, that's Bridal By Lori!! Although they can be a little pricey, I've had a great experience at their store and since we've been engaged so long, I've been going for 2 years now lol. I've been a few times to visit my dress and then countless to looks at BMs, MOB dresses, jewelry, and now fittings.
@Corilee13: and @muckmoo1: Your dresses are beautiful!
@mrsmurraytobe: Your dress is beautiful!
The practical side of me says sell. The sentimental side of me (the larger portion...I'm a sentiment hoarder) says to keep it.
Not sure yet what I'll do. Guess I'll decide after the wedding.
I am either selling my gown or donating. I am sentimental, but I will probably keep my veil or other elements of the wedding other than my dress.
My mother donated her dress to someone who couldn't afford hers, and I always found that very kind. So I may go that route, or sell the dress and use the money to get my parents a gift since they have been very generous with my wedding.
I also get the sentimentality of keeping your dress, but it will honestly just be 'something' that you keep moving around from closet to closet and eventually into a box or stored in a suitcase. Then you'll wonder why it had so much value other than emotional. In my day, no one sold them or even thought about it, and if we were lucky enough, someone actually asked to borrow it for their own weddings.
After 30 years, I finally took the plunge and cut off my train and used it to cover my daughter's card box for her wedding last May. The first cut into the fabric was a bit painful (and unexpected), but I did it and have no regrets. The rest is still being stored to use to make a quilt for my first grandchild. :)
You'll be fine once it's gone.
I'm keeping mine, but I really couldn't imagine getting much back for it & I don't think I'd want to give it up. Even though the probability of my future daughter (if I have one) would even like it enough to wear it 20 or so years from now is slim, I would have loved to have the option of wearing my mother's dress. Chances are I wouldn't have wanted a dress from the 80's lol & that's sorta how I look at mine- styles are everchanging & no matter how classic a style, it could very well look dated no matter what. Plus, picking the wedding dress is such a personal thing & my mother and I don't exactly have the same taste ;)
Your dress is gorgeous, but I can understand wanting to sell it to recoup- it's just a wise decision. I think you'll be glad you did, good luck with it- I hope you get the amount you ask 
Selling it!
I'm not big on keeping it for "sentimental" reasons for the IF chance that my daughter if I have a daughter might want to wear it in 20 years.
And it takes up too much room!
my mom actually borrowed her dress from a friend, so it's not I like grew up with her having a dress around the house, so it seems normal to me to have no attachment to your dress. It's just a "thing," and I'm starting to see enough of my friends be like "oh, why do I have to move this dress around and have it take up space in my closet," just because we have been convinced that the wedding dress is THE most important thing about the wedding, and therefor you have to keep it forever.
um...whatever.
I'd like to sell it...but then I'm also 5 ft tall so we'll see after the wedding! I like my dress, but I also went way over budget, and it's a very nice silk dress, so I hope there would be someone out there who would want it!
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