Post # 1
My brother and SIL are extremely self-centered, only call when they want something, and then criticize whatever help FH and I give. FH and I don’t like to spend time with them, but try to have a cordial relationship for the good of the family. They have a six-month-old baby, and while they have not specifically said it, FH and I think it annoys them that we do not fawn all over her. We are supportive- waited in the hospital, helped with the baptism party, etc., but we’re not baby people, and even if we were, it’s hard to get excited about a baby when you don’t like the parents.
There is a festival tomorrow that FH and I LOVE going to and try to get our friends to go. Two months ago, SIL told me that they were coming with us to the festival and made it clear they expect to hang out with us the entire time. While the festival is a public event and they are free to go, it irritates me that they expect us to spend our time with them. They drive me crazy, so I am not the most objective person when it comes to them. Am I overreacting? How would you handle this?
Post # 3
Oh, that sucks. Are there other friends of yours that will also be there? Is there a specific activity at the festival you want to do, but they might not enjoy? I’m thinking you could play off the, “We’re looking forward to seeing you guys there, but we haven’t seen Mike and Mindy in a really long time, and promised to show them around the festival too.” Then just…dissapear for a while 🙂 That’s easier said than done if the festival is on the small side, though.
Or you could head to booths you know they won’t like much with the excuse of catching up with them later. It’s also likely that they’ll need to take a breather and stop somewhere at some point for their oh-so-precious-darling baby girl, and you two can hit it up by yourselves for a while, claming you don’t want to miss xyz. Then just take your time getting back to them – they might be a bit irritated about it, but it’s not like you invited them along to begin with. They’re adults and should be able to handle themselves at a public event without you there 24/7.
Post # 4
@guitargirl:I would probably let them tag along, but if you have other friends going use them as an escape at some point. For instance if your SIL says, “Want to go over there?” you can say “Oh well I told Mike we’d go with them there…so we can meet up later if you want.” and if you make it seem like you have a SET plan, it’ll be less obvious that they annoy the crap out of you. I hateeee these sorts of situations and I fully understand what you’re going through.