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How do you QUIT??!?!!?

posted 2 years ago in Career
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    Bumble bee
    MrsK2be    November 15, 2008   Ohio

    Have you ever had to quit a job??? How did you do it? How did it turn out?   I haven't ever had to quit anything (!) and I am faced with that possibilty now.  I really don't know how to do it.  I mean, I realize that the professional thing to do is to write a letter, give sufficient notice and move on hopefully unscathed.  But I'm more worried about the personal aspect - hurt feelings, broken commitments,etc.

    I work for a small family business and have worked for them for YEARS! I am in charge of several really LARGE projects that span through the summer and into the fall.  They are counting on me for a lot - and I just dont know how to quit.

    I'm not a quitter I guess...this is SOOOO hard.  Any anecdotes, advice or stories are welcome!

    HELP!

     

     
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    Sugar bee
    KellyV    September 12, 2009   New York, NY

    its difficult, but you have to do what is best for you.  Like you said, write a litter and give ample notice.  Sit your boss down and explain the situation and reason for having to leave.  Let them know it was a very difficult decision on your part, but it has to be done.  Then ask how you can make the transition easier for them in your time left.

    I quit a job after a few years.  It was a large company, but upper management knew me and had plans.  all of my friends were there (and most of them still are.) I broke down and cried, but got through it.  Its SO difficult, but people move on all the time

     
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    Sugar bee
    teaadntoast    04/23/2010   New York, NY

    Are you leaving for a specific reason?  Do you have a new job with a particular start date?

     
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    Helper bee
    Puggy    November 27, 2010   Southern Indiana/Northwest Florida

    Do you already have something else lined up? Because, trust me, you do not want to be without a job and looking for one right now. (In fact, I am stalling going to the Unemployment office right now).

    But, if you do, then give them plenty of time if you are that close. Etiquette says at least 2 weeks notice. Whenever I decided to move out of the state, I gave my boss 6 weeks notice to help him find a replacement. I was in the middle of several large projects, but I wanted to go back to school. He and I were close enough that there were no hard feelings, and he appreciated that I told him so far in advance. Also, I did it face to face, not in a letter. I did eventually have to type up a formal 2 week notice for HR, but he knew weeks in advance.

     
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    Sugar bee
    littlemissmoo    July 18, 2010   London, UK

    Eh, its a different kettle of fish for me because I freelance. But I have handed in my notice to some jobs before and it's always a bit hard. Actually I handed in my notice to the job where my FH was my boss (before we got engaged) and that was just weird. My advice is to write your letter of resignation and keep it really professional. Don't let personal feelings get clouded into it and if they ask the reason keep it private. "There's a lot of reasons and I'm not ready to disclose any of them yet" is a professional way to keep the peace. As they're a company they'll understand that sometimes people need to leave their work for whatever reason.

    Good luck!

     
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    Bumble bee
    LadyGoodman    September 25, 2010   Baltimore, MD

    I would type up a 2 weeks notice letter and sit down and speak with them about quitting.  I always offered to assist with the end of any large projects I was working on until they found someone to fill my spot, which always seemed appreciated.

    Building up and during my 2 final weeks, I would also focus a lot of time on putting together a "manual" for my position.  It would give detailed instructions on everything I did and how to do it.  I always find that no one, except for the person in the position, knows everything you do and I am sure the person coming in behind you would appreciate an explanation of what to expect.  I also always went through my emails and files and organized it all so that someone else would be able to comprehend and easily figure out my system.

    When it comes down to it, you leaving might come as a surprise, but in business it happens.  If there are any hard feelings about you leaving, that just means that they don't respect your need to grow and move on . . . It can happen, but if that's the outcome, two weeks goes by much faster than you think.

     
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    Bee Keeper
    lilyfaith    June 23, 2012   Lakeview, Chicago

    I had such a hard time quitting my last job. It was a second job to supplement my better paying job, and it was just interfering with my school work. But because I had worked there for a year and there was a high turnover rate, it was weird. I really loved our head manager, and I had to quit to her... she asked me not to, and told me that if I missed it in a few months I should come back. I did have to type up a letter of resignation, etc, but that part wasn't hard. It was weird leaving everyone... 

    The really awkward part is that I gave my two weeks' notice, and they scheduled me for the next three weeks. I worked it anyway, but was stunned that they'd do that. 

    Besides that, I've quit other part-time jobs, but none that I had been so involved in as this one. 

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Miss Chapstick    September 2009  

    I've quit twice! It's always a little uncomfortable, but it can be easy if you're prepared. Here are some things to consider:

    1. Write up a resignation letter. Keep it simple. I would usually write something like, "It is with anticipation and regret that I submit my two-weeks notice as[position] at [company name]. I am very pleased with my experiences at [company name] will always appreciate the opportunities I was give here."

    2. E-mail/Call your boss and schedule a meeting and explain you need to discuss something with them.

    3. Once at the meeting, just explain your situation. I was always pretty honest and just said, "A new opportunity came up, and after a lot of thoughtful consideration, I've decided to take it." Explain that you're willing to do whatever necessary to find a replacement and help get everything organized for your departure.

    4. Some companies do exit interviews. Google it and prepare. I did one at my first job I left, and it wasn't anything to get worked up over, it's just good to have an idea of what to say.

    5. So important: no matter how much you hated the job (if you did) leave on good terms. I'm sure you know this, but it can't hurt to throw it out there! I HATED my first boss. She was awful and borderline emotionall-abusive. I didn't say a word about it while in the process of leaving.

    Hope that helps!

     
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    Bumble bee
    MrsK2be    November 15, 2008   Ohio

    @teadntoast and puggy: I am considering leaving for another position.  I just had an interview today (and several more last week) and it sounds very promising.  I would never quit my job without another lined up - especially in this economy!  But I still don't have an offer...just waiting.

    It's just hard because I just accepted a promotion with my current employer (2 month ago) and I really wasn't expecting this to come up.  But the new position would utilize my degree which is important to me.  I have a meeting with my current owners and my fellow managers on Monday and at that meeting I wish I could tell them...but I still probably won't know anything about the new position. Uggghhh... (I live and work 1.5 hours away from owners/managers).

    I just feel like I've been going behind their backs and cheating on them while I continue to accept assignments and act like nothing is different.  I can't stand it!

     
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    Bee Keeper
    2PeasinaPod       Philadelphia

    Write them your resignation letter, and explain exactly what you told us in your second post. You appreciate all of the opportunity they gave you, but this position just fell into your lap. It gives you the opportunity to utilize your degree, and do what you've always dreamed of doing. Also let them know that the new position is closer to where you live, and it's just much more adventageous for you to take that job right now. They'll appreciate your honesty. It will be really hard, but they will respect you for letting them know.

     
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    Bumble bee
    MrsK2be    November 15, 2008   Ohio

    @MissChapstick: Thank you so much for that concise overview!

    The problem for me is that I LOVE my bosses and I really do LIKE my job. It's just sort of a dead end job for me.  I know I can do more - and I need some challenge in my life.

    It's super hard because my bosses and co-workers transcend a workplace relationship.  My boss introduced me to my husband (they've always been good friends).  He is SOO nice and understanding (I made a work error last week and he comforted me all the way through it...so understanding).  They all attended my wedding and gave us insanely generous wedding gifts. THey invite us on vacation with them...it's like a family!  Ugghhh.. I just feel sick about it.

     
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    Sugar bee
    teaadntoast    04/23/2010   New York, NY

    I think so long as you're very clear in your reasons for leaving - that it's because your current job just can't offer you what this new one will, and give them ample notice, there won't be hard feelings.

    It's not them, it's the nature of the position, and if your bosses are professionals they'll understand and not hold it against you.  If you're worried about the projects you've been assigned, you could offer to help recruit or train your replacement.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Miss Chapstick    September 2009  

    @MrsK2be: I know, it's definitely hard! Even when you don't like your job/boss, it's never an easy thing to do.

    BUT, like others have said, this is your career, and if you can use your degree in another position that really is better suited for you, I know your bosses would understand. If the time comes, just explain that it wasn't planned, and the opportunity found you, and that you really thought long and hard before accepting the job. They can't take it too personally because it really is just business. Just explain your heartfelt thanks for all the opportunities they gave you.

     
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    Sugar bee
    Melissabegins    December 12, 2009  

    the way i imagine quitting is to gather my things, tip my desk over, flash people the peace sign and walk out.  then text all my friends to meet me at happy hour and have a great night. that's what i'd recommend. that, or write a concise letter to your boss and give 2 weeks, whatever. ;-)

     
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    Bumble
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    Lillindy    September 2008   Bay Area, CA

    Quitting sucks, last time I quit it was kind of a nasty situation and that's the only time I've ever done it.  As much as it does suck, though, think about how LUCKY you are that you found another job that you love!  I would personally love to be in your shoes (especially since I'm dying to quit my current job!)

     
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    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    I've resigned from 2 jobs in my life and moved on to new companies. First of all, right now meaning before you actually have an offer letter and the background check has gone through just act totally normal at work like nothing's happening behind the scenes. If you have friends at your company DONT tell them, trust me! No matter how close you think you are, gossip is gossip and everyone will know within about 5 minutes.

    Second, once you get the offer wait for the background check to go through and you have an actual start date. Anything can happen during the background check, you have to be prepared for it. Your start date can always be pushed back.

    Third, draft an actual letter of resignation (you can google resignation letters) and sign and date it. Like Ms. Chapstick said, schedule a meeting with your direct manager (first thing in the morning is best) and give him/her the letter. Make sure it says you are resigning effectve exactly 2 weeks from the day you give your notice. Otherwise, they don't have to pay you for those 2 weeks if they decide you should leave that day.

    Don't give too much information and don't apologize under any circumstances. Don't make them believe you are doing anything wrong. Just explain that you are officially resigning effective 2 weeks from today to pursue another opportunity. Thank them for the time you spent with their company and mention you hope you can use them as a reference in the future.

    Trust me - the SECOND you start apologizing for resigning they get pissed. This is about you. You have to look out for yourself. A better oportunity came up and you are taking advantage to further your career. They can fire you at any time if they need to make budget cuts (and probably would too if it's a small family company) so don't feel like you're letting anyone down.

    If you do have to stay for the whole 2 weeks, it will be awkward, but do a good job cleaning up before your last day. Let your manager know where to find everything you had been working on and give status updates and action items that he/she can easily transfer onto your replacement. As long as you do this, you will most likely leave on good terms and be able to use them as a reference in the future.

     
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    artbee    February 28, 2010  

    i quit my last job and felt horrible about it- i knew they would have trouble replacing me, and i knew the staff would be stuck taking on my work load, so i felt awful for doing that to them. but for my own mental and physical health, i had to do it. i was pretty friendly with my boss('s) so i just explained to them what was going on. they weren't suprised by this, as before i quit i went to them to explain my stress/crazy work load to see if we could do anything about it. we couldn't. they completely understood and actually told me that while they hated to see me go, i should do what's right for me, and tried to find me another, less crazy stressful job within our company before i wrote the resignation letter. i think by that time i just needed out right then, so i was like whatever, just let me give my two weeks! and left... but i definitely learned to think of myself first. people are more understanding than you think.

     
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    Bumble bee
    MrsK2be    November 15, 2008   Ohio

    Thank you for all the great advice Bees!  I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I'm just waiting to hear about this position and every day that goes by gives me more and more anxiety/ guilt for my current employer.

     
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    Bee Keeper
    artbee    February 28, 2010  

    don't feel guilty! you have to do what's best for yourself.

     
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    KateByDesign    October 29, 2011   Fairfax, Virginia

    I'm bumping this. Does anyone have any advice for quitting after only 2 months? Of course I started a previous thread about how excited I was about this new job, but it turned out to be NOTHING as advertised.

    I come home and cry every day and stress (and drink) through my entire weekend. I feel really depressed because of this position I'm in and it's so toxic.
    But I've only been there 2 months and I really like the people I work with. Quitting will leave all of them in a really bad position - having to take on my work load (which is ALOT).

    I don't have another job lined up because a. I don't immediately need one because of my Husband's income and b. I want to travel and see family before I jump into another job with no vacation time.

    Any advice?

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Gabrielle123    November 5, 2011  

    @KateByDesign:  I was in the same situation a couple of yeras ago. I would come home and bawl my eyes out. I didn't eat and I hated Fridays becuase they were closer to Monday.

    I didn't have any job lined up but I knew I couldn't stay there. It wasn't good for my health. I literally went up to the manager (it was a call center/telemarketing job which is NOT what it sounded like in the interview) and told him I could not do it and how it was affecting my health. He was completely understanding. I found a new job about 6 weeks later. Within those 6 weeks I was applying like crazy.

    Let me tell you though, i felt so much BETTER! It was like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders.

    Oh and I was only there for 5 weeks..less than you! good luck!

     

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