Post # 1
I do not want to put NO KIDS on the invitation but I am worried that some people will not get it.
I am so confused we have about 25 kids on our guest list and I do not want any kids there aside from a my brothers (will 9, 12, 13), my son (will be 4), our flower girl (will be 3), and my junior brides maid (will be 9).
That is all I want. I love my cousins and such but honestly I am not close enough to some of that family that has the children to allow them to come. We dont have it in our budget. My son and our flower girl will be calling it a night at 9pm (we hired a babysitter for those 2).
Am I a horrible person for this?
Post # 4
Although some might give you flack for it, I’m with you! I did not want kids other than our nieces and nephews at our wedding. We used “Adult Only” in our invitations. We still had people asking if they could bring their children, which we politely replied, no we’re at capacity 🙂
Post # 5
@Waitingbee57: Just put the names of th epeople who are invited on your invites. You may get people trying to RSVP for their kids still, though. In that case, you’ll just have to say sorry to them and they’ll have to decide to come childless or change their RSVP to no.
An additional strategy is to have wording on the RSVP card similar to “we have 2 seats reserved in your honor” to really pound home that only the couple, instead of the whole family, is invited.
If you think lots of people will automatically assume their kiddos are invited, you could put “Adult only reception” but it’s not considered very couth. Depends on whether you care about that!
Post # 6
Thank you all I just dont want to have a lot of kids there because our wedding venue only allows us to have 180 guests with all 25 kids invited and their parents we would have the invited guest list up to 220. So if you go by the rule of thumb being 20% decline rsvp I will still be too close to hiting 180 and that is not comfortable for me. I would like to take the 25 kids about and go down to 195 incase only 15 decide to decline…
Post # 7
@DomesticDiva: I like the wording on the RSVP I think that is what I will do.
Post # 8
the last wedding we were invited to the reception card said “adult only reception” we have three kids and I wasn’t offended in the least….it was nice not listening to screaming kids all night.
Post # 9
@Waitingbee57: You can either say “Adult Only Reception” or a lot have my friends have done either “21+ reception” or “18+ reception”
Post # 10
- Wedding: February 2014 - Kentucky Center for the Performing Arts
I will be putting “Adults Only Reception” on my invitations. I really do not care about how “others” feel about this. It’s our wedding, our decision. The only kids invited will be my two little brothers (ages 9 and 14) , my child (flower girl), FI’s son (ring bearer). These are the only kids allowed and all four are apart of the wedding party anyways. I do like the idea of 21+ or 18+ Reception as well. Anyways I decided to place it on the invitations because I am not doing reception or RSVP cards. Everyone that’s invited are in town and can just send me a email response or tell me face-to-face wheter or not they are coming…which is against all wedding etiquette right? Lol!
Post # 11
@slc201329: Thats how I feel but at the same time I have like 15 year olds that I dont mind would come because they are people I am very close to but I am sorry my distant cousin who I barely see anyways has 6 kids who are terribly misbehaved and most of them dont even know who I am. then we have the cousins I am terribly close too…So its kind of getting to me. I know for sure that I cant just be like some kids can come and some kids cant because that is incredibly rude. This guest list planning is going to get the best of me.
Post # 12
Make your RSVP cards clear – put # of seats reserved and only put 2 for an adult couple, not 4 or whatever for their kids. Most people should get it… If they change the number or add more names then you’ll have to call and explain sorry, the invite is just for you two.
Post # 13
It takes more time but on every RSVP, I am writing
Mr. John White Regrets Will attend Fish Steak Vegan
Mrs John White Regrets Will Attend Fish Steak Vegan
Invites are non transferable. This is not a fraternity bash. If someone writes in extras, they will get called, by either me, fiance, FMIL or Mom (depending on how they got on invite) and be told, very sorry if we were not clear (which BS, we were), invite is for Mr and Mrs. only.
Post # 14
I’ve been tempted to create a “You Must Be At Least This Tall To Enter This Party” like they have at amusement parks sign. I don’t think I would, but the thought of it makes me laugh.
Post # 15
“Adult Reception to Follow”
Post # 16
I am totally with you!
I only invited a handful of kids to my wedding – my first cousins.
I probably have about 200 second cousins, most of which I’ve never met, and I wasn’t inviting them (even though I invited their parents).
I would just list the names of each individual on the invitations – it’s a pain in the ass, but the only way to ensure uninvited people don’t show up.
IMO, this is a better option than say “adult reception,” because when people show up and the “select” kids are there, they’ll be pissed.