Post # 1
My DH both work fulltime & do not have kids (besides our dogs!). He used to work from home so he would usually cook & I would clean. It was a great system! But since October of last year, he made a job change and now has to go into an office. During this time I also changed my hours at work so I get home fairly early in the afternoon (around 3/3:30pm) since thats happened, Ive taken on the cooking. I don’t mind cooking at all, I actually enjoy it, but Im getting overwhelmed doing all the cooking as well as the cleaning & looking after the dogs! He does some yard maintenance but we recently hired yard people because he really doesn’t feel like he has the time to get it done (I disagree with that…..) We are having a talk tonight about all of this because I have expressed to him that Im feeling a bit shafted in this area…so ladies, how do you and your partners split up the housework? Are you satisfied with your arangement?
Post # 2
We don’t really divide chores. We just make a list of everything that needs to be done, put it on the fridge, and we both try to check them off whenever we have a chance. Sometimes, like right now, that means he does more, because I am particularly busy with work. Other times, when his schedule is really cramped, I do more. Neither of us really keeps track, but that’s probably because neither of us feels shafted. We also tend to do things based on our strengths and preferences. For instance, he’s a better cook than I am, so he tends to take that off the list, but I am better at organizing bills so I naturally gravitate towards that chore.
I guess we don’t really have a system. Our “system” is that we pool all of our resources and tackle the chores as a team. We find them all equally annoying… 🙂
Post # 3
- Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle
I tend to cook as I’m home first, but then he’ll clean the kitchen up. We tend to tackle the rest as a team – hit it all at the weekend.
Post # 4
My DH and I don’t have a set list of who does what. We both work, but he works really long hours and 3 weeks out of the month only has one day off. Basically I do mostly everything and will ask him to do a couple things when he works late or has a day off.
Post # 5
Until a month ago I was working quite a bit of overtime and DH stepped up and did most of the cooking and cleaning. I would occasionally do bathrooms on weekends and help out with laundry every weekend but the rest was kind of on him because I got home so late (and worked weekends).
Now we are both working the same amount of hours during the week but I have half day Fridays so I work later the other days. Because of this arrangement I typically get home Fridays and do the bulk of the cleaning and he cooks almost every night.
When our schedules were the same we typically cooked and cleaned along side each other. We didn’t split chores up- we just got stuff done when it needed to be done (laundry, trash, etc.).
I’m very happy with the “half day Friday” arrangement right now because I don’t like cooking and I don’t mind cleaning. Perhaps we will keep it this way even when our schedules change at the end of the summer.
Post # 6
My husband does a little more cooking than I do, but I do almost all the cleaning. I’m kind of a control freak so I like things my way and just prefer to do them. It used to bother me that we didn’t split 50/50 but then I realized if he was going to clean I couldn’t micromanage him while he did it. He also makes twice the money I make so I don’t mind doing extra housework. His income allows us to have more fun so that’s how I contribute. He is always good about telling me the house looks nice and thanks for taking care of it.
Post # 7
AOriver: If I had more time I think I would honestly do all the house work while he would do the yard work. Typically I will always do dishes and clean the house while he cooks and does the yard work. Our schedules are never really consistent so we try to balance one another out with chores. If I feel like he is having a rough week I will try to take on more and vice verse. I will let him know if I am feeling overwhelmed and he will always help out a little more.
I think as long as you guys talk it out and come up with a plan or give him that heads up then I don’t see why there should be a problem.
Post # 8
I don’t think we ever discussed it. DH is a nurse so he’ll work three days be off four most of the time. I do most of the cleaning/errands while he cooks dinner, does laundry, takes out the trash, etc.
Post # 9
ilikeballet: This is totally me!! Id much rather clean then cook & I think DH would rather cook then clean…it just works out so its much easier for me to get dinner ready since he doesn’t usually get home until 6pm. But…..he doesn’t like to clean! So….clearly we need to have a chat lol !
Kendrao: Totally! If I ask him to help, he is more then happy to & when I told him I was feeling overwhelmed he said “lets talk tonight and figure out a plan so you’re not feeling that way!” its my bad for not speaking up sooner!
Post # 10
My husband does the dishes; his bathroom; cat litter and his own laundry. I do everything else (cooking; carpets; floors; dusting; vacuuming; trash take out; linen washing; etc.) It works for us. 🙂
Post # 11
I cook and clean and take care of the cat stuff and laundry, but he takes the garbage out, waters the plants, picks up after himself (mostly), and helps me when I need it. We take turns with the fish tank.
Post # 12
- Wedding: September 2014 - SPRING VALLEY COUNTRY CLUB
We don’t split anything. I do all the cooking,cleaning, laundry, and typw of house work I do it. It may at times dawn on him “oh hey, maybe i should help too”[ but those times are few and far between
Post # 13
We give it all to the cleaning lady. Seriously. It’s a lot more affordable than I’d ever dreamed possible & well worth it.
Post # 14
AOriver: I pretty much take care of all the “domestic” responsibilities since I am a SAHM right now but when I was working full time we split everything down the middle….very similar to what you guys used to do.
Basically whoever got off earlier (usually him) cooks and the other person does the dishes. He usually took out the trash and things like that and we would both split the weekly cleaning (ex: I clean living room and kitchen and he does bathroom). As for laundry, we each do our own, but I usually did the sheets and our daughter’s laundry in addition. We live in an apt right now so no yard work required, but if that were the case (and we didn’t have hired help for that) I would probably take on the house cleaning and he would do the yard work. Since it sounds like your DH hired ppl to do the yard work, I would say u both split the household chores down the middle. I always think its a good daily system to have the person who didn’t cook do the cleaning so that no one feels they are doing EVERYTHING while the other just sits back and enjoys lol
Post # 15
- Wedding: Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic
I cook and he cleans, and he also does the lawn. That is the way we agreed over 3 years ago and it has been working great. I cook him whatever he want to eat. I do help him out when I see him cleaning but he understands that is his chore and I do not expect him to cook, ever. If dinner is not ready when he gets home we have problems 🙂