Post # 1
This has probably been asked a million times before, so i’m sorry in advance. But, how do you deal with the excitement and anxiousness to get engaged? I have always wanted to get married at some point in my life, but it was never really anything I dreamt about as a girl, etc. But, with my SO, I feel so differently. I am so excited to be able to say “This is my husband, Grant”…amongst many other things. We’ve talked about it and it’s exactly what he wants, but he wants the timing to be right with money. He has a wonderful job and luckily makes good money, but I know he wanted to have certain things paid off before he bought a ring. Which definitely makes sense. And, I also know he really wants me to be surprised. Sooo, pretty much I need to know how to shut up haha. I love talking about weddings, we have quite a few friends engaged/getting engaged and I get so excited for them, but I feel like the more I talk about it, the more he’ll wait since he doesn’t want me to be expecting it. I also am dying to know if he’s gone to look at rings or anything. If I knew he was, I think maybe i’d stop thinking about it nonstop. I feel like he’s not very good at keeping surprises or being sneaky, so I don’t know how he could go out shopping for a ring and whatnot and be able to hide it from me. I just want to revel in the amazingness of our relationship and not be dying for a proposal, but I am so excited that I don’t know how to do that.
Post # 3
Weddingbee is great therapy! Like retail therapy but cheaper but far more fun! And so friendly. Keeping distracted is always good, and like one bee said to me when I first started posting – exercise. I took up dance. 🙂
You have to enjoy your relationship as it is. Even though there are times of disappointment. It will happen.
Men need their moment. And proposing is the one thing they have control over (and we dont!). I think keep mum is a good idea but I’m rubbish at it. Been pretty good recently. Problem is – I’m always on here, and he’s always asking “what’s going on on your website?” aka Weddingbee.
Best of luck. Welcome.
Post # 4
Hobbies. Seriously. I run a lot. I love it cause it keeps me in shape, kills my stress, and my mind literally goes blank after a run. Do you like to read? I’ve been blowing through a lot of books. I’ve slowly looked at little things here and there that I thought would be cool for a wedding. Cooking, cleaning, buying a house took my mind off of being engaged for a long time. Planning vacations, taking classes on the side, getting our kitties and being rewarded with even more messes. 😉 And I bought a RHR to help with the ring crave.
Keep busy, that’s really the key and try not to worry. It’ll happen.
Post # 5
I know exactly what you mean about men needing their moment. And I think he’s truly excited to be able to do this how he wants and to make it surprising and special for me.
Thank you 🙂
Post # 6
@claireos: haha, that’s funny…I just started running (c25k) about 5 weeks ago!! I am loving it so far. It’s my time to think, or not think at all and listen to my music, blow off some steam, and i’m in such a great mood after I finish.
I do enjoy reading a lot, but rarely do it 🙁 I have work (45 hours a week), then school…and when I get into a book I never want to stop reading, and I find that I don’t ever have a ton of time to do things like that.
I am doing a lot of the things you mentioned. Our house isn’t new to us, but we have slowly been repainting rooms and redecorating and that is time consuming and takes my mind off everything except that room for a while. We are also going on an 8 day ski trip to Colorado (he surprised me with it), which I am having fun figuring out stuff to do. However, with that, people at my work keep saying “he’s gonna do it in Colorado” and I hate that I know I’m gonna get my hopes up. Which I really don’t want. I want to truly be able to enjoy that trip.. I never get that much time off.
Post # 7
I (re)took up knitting! I always need something in my hands to fiddle with (4th generation tailor, yo!), and most knitting projects keep my mind occupied as well, with counting, keeping track of where I am etc. AND, it resulted in me knitting nearly ALL my Christmas gifts this year, with only $50-60 in yarn!
Post # 8
Oh my god i’m in the same boat. This waiting game is killing me and its actually been making me terribly angry and stressed. I had some kind of a break down where i was just terribly mean this sunday. On the monday he had flowers delivered to my work and later we talked. Be asked if i was acting like this because i was upset i wouldnt be proposed to by Christmas. I said no (haha LIE) and he reassured me he will propose when the time is right.
So honestly its so freaking difficult but you have to keep your mouth shut and try to ignore things! Bringing it up makes it worse and i kick myself every time i do because i feel like he postponed it then.
Its going to happen dont worry!! Ugh i should take my own advice lol
Post # 9
The excitement doesn’t go away but you can find crafts and such to keep you busy, lol
Post # 10
@Rush1986: EXACTLY!!! hahahah, I seriously kick myself every single time I bring it up, because then i’m like “great..I just pushed it back a week”….and my weeks are all really adding up now bahaha.
Post # 11
hahaha it makes me feel better than i’m not in this boat alone though. And really what more can we do? They know we want it. We know they will get it. As long as they havent said “I dont believe in marriage” i think we’re ok.
but really……BOYS JUST DO IT ALREADY!! lol
Post # 12
This board helps a lot! I like to daydream about different types of weddings that I might like. I’m currently planning for our next vacation. My brother is getting married in August and I’m one of the bridesmaids so they get me pretty involved. Seems to cool my wedding fever because I’m so excited for them I’m able to put my excitement at bay for a bit lol.
Don’t get me wrong..I talk to my SO way to much about it and always digging for hints. As of last night though I’ve decided to try and give it a rest for a few months. A rest as in not bringing it up to SO lol. Once you know that your SO absolutley wants to marry you it doesn’t seem so hard to wait. Good Luck!!
I’m new and love these boards. I’m sure you will too!
Post # 13
I tried wasting time on Pinterest and just ended up making a “Wedding Stuff” board that has prob 200 pins on it. lol
Post # 14
Try to keep yourself distracted or you’ll go crazy! Fiance always said he wanted it to be a surprise for me, but I didn’t think he’d be able to keep it a secret. We live together and share a bank account, it would be very hard. He made me believe that we were going ring shopping together on a Monday and the Friday before (my birthday) he asked me how mad I would be if we didn’t go ring shopping together on Monday, and then he pulled out my dream ring. Then I made him explain to me all the details of how he did it, and let me tell you, I never saw it coming! All of my family, all of his family, and all of our friends already knew it was coming. So if he wants it to be a surprise, he will find a way. lol
Trust me, being newly engaged, I fully understand how hard it is to wait when all you want is to start the rest of your life with someone. I literally had a deadline set in my mind where I wouldn’t wait any longer. But looking back now, I feel that if we would have gone ring shopping together, it would have really taken away from that moment. If a man wants to marry you, he will ask you when he is ready… And that doesn’t make it any easier for us!
Post # 15
- Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada ♥ EDD- April 2016
Distraction is key (: I find it really hard to wait sometimes but I find it gets a bit easier if I’m focused on school or baking or something. Coming on here definitely makes a HUGE difference 😉 and going on sites like wedding gawker have really helped me too. I try my best to focus on other things and think about what we’ve accomplished together and to think about all the other wonderful surprises that SO has given me (:
Post # 15
I am struggling with this issue myself. (I googled: “How to not think about getting engaged”… Its so hard because you know that he’s the guy and that the Lord has placed him in your life. We enjoy casually talking about our future wedding someday… I have a hard time not taking those conversations so seriously. I need to just enoy our time together in the present. The future will come soone enough. Dont be so focused on the future that you miss out on what is right infront of you. I have read some of the pervious responses on this topic and I agree about the man needing his moment. It’s the one thing that he can plan completely without my input. He is trying to wait to where he and I both are financially ready. I completely agree with that mind set. It is just hard because when you’re in love, you tend to forget about those important things. Please be in prayer that God gives me patience on His will and Taylor’s timing. Thanks you guys!!