How great is it to have children?

posted 3 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
4587 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Yes, motherhood is tiring. But I instantly forget how exhausted I am when my 4-month-old smiles at me. Seriously. There is nothing better.

Post # 4
Member
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I am an older Bee (over 50)

And I’ve accomplished a lot of great things in my life

And I’ve had my share of disappointments too

But by far my kids are my greatest achievement

And although there have been some “bumps” along the way in our relationship (especially as they transitioned from being a child to an adult) those things are sort of par for the course as a Parent / Child Relationship

THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN A DISAPPOINTMENT TO ME

(Cannot say that about anyone else in my life)

I am their Biggest Fan

And here is a thought from an older woman that people don’t think about when they are younger

I get that some people decide not to have kids

BUT there is nothing sadder as life goes on than not having kids & grandkids to surround yourself with

I have Parents and friends Parents now who are in the 80s, 90s and beyond

These people live each day in anticipation of seeing their Kids & Grandkids

It gives them hope. 

I was just at a 90th BDay Party… and it was fantastic… 4 generations, and tons of extended family, friends, and neighbours etc.

The 90 Year Old was still kickin it at midnight !!

Kids keep you young !!

(On the other side of the coin, the saddest funeral I’ve ever been too was for a Great Aunt… Grandparent’s Sister, who was in her 90s who never married and never had kids.  She was a vibrant career woman in her lifetime.  But eventually she retired.  Lived alone. Then got older, sick and moved to a nursing home, where she knew no one.  She died alone.  There was just 4 of us at her funeral.  Me, my Dad, his Brother & Wife.  That was it, that was all.  The woman literally had no other family.  That alone made me cry)

 

Post # 5
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Here is my Family. We just got married on Saturday. I hope you can see how truly amazing life is with children.

Post # 6
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@This Time Round:  Your message made me smile and is the exact type of story i like to read to give me courage and hope that it will all be ok.

I too am nervous about having children but simply because of the thought of them growing into teenagers/adults and not being able to control them and bring them up to be good people but I know that I will regret not having children and there is no point worrying about what has not yet been and may not yet be.

Im sure we will also hit bumps in the road along the way but Im sure we will make it out on the other side and look back at the adults we have raised and can be proud of.

Post # 7
Member
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

TO @Bindi:  you are right to be concerned about the unknowns that the future will bring when raising kids …

BUT just like one has 9 months to get ready for a new baby… you have about 11 years to get ready for the roller coaster that are the teenage years.  I’d have to say 11 to 15 are the worst.  The are just a pile of hormones and adult bodies, with not a lot of brain power to balance that out.  A lot of stuff can go wrong in those 4 years (boys or girls).  One truly has to be vigilant, and maybe make necessary adjustments changes.

Cause as I’ve said here before on WBee with kids you only get one kick at the can.  One childhood to get it right… get it wrong and yes it can affect their whole lives.

Babies to 2 are one phase.

3 & 4 another

5 to 10 wonderful years… not a lot of issues whatsover.  Many a Parent will tell you these are “the wonder years” when kids are cooperative, and easy to get along with as a family.

11 to 15 trying (and exhausting)

On the otherhand their brains tend to come back / grow up by the time they are 16.  Sixteen to 18 is a lot easier.

Then they exert their independence again 18 to 25 or so … this time is hard for Parents, the empty nest years.  And as a Parent, it is US WHO MUST GROW.  As this is the age group who barely calls home… cause they are off living an exciting life.

Then after 25 things are truly great… Kids become your best friends… a real joy when both the kid and the Parents are young enough to enjoy things together… have had some great vacations with this age group.

Usually those are years of transition to… they’ve finished school, starting a career, looking to settle down, maybe start a family.  Suddenly they find that the knowledge that Mom & Dad have accumulated in life might be helpful.  Lol

At the same time, we want to encourage them to enjoy the fact that the whole world is their oyster… opening up to them as never before as they enter their 30s !!

And so it goes

Life is a fascinating circle…

Here I am closing in on 60, and I have to say I am anxiously awaiting Grandkiddies… what a total joy that will be !!

But at the same time I would never prod or push, or pull… or pester my children in how they choose to live their lives.

As one of my adult children asked me when they turned 18…

“How come you aren’t all freakin out about my tattoo… ?”

And I calmly said the truth…

“Honey, I parented you EXTENSIVELY for 18 years.  6570 Days & Nights, I looked out for you and over you.  I taught you right and wrong, and gave you all the tools you need to make it in the world.  What you do now as an Adult is your business.  I’ll still be here if you need me, cause I love you… BUT in truth my job is done”

They were rather shocked.

But they later said they appreciated that I didn’t have a fit, or was judgemental of their choice.

Lol, nope.  Not my choice, but hey I’m not going to worry about it.  It is their choice and they are the ones who have to live with it.

And so it goes… be it their tattoos, jobs, SOs … whatever.  I am here to continue to be their BIGGEST FAN.  But my Parenting Days are over (well in the hands on role). 

In truth they’ll always be my Babies, and I’ll always be their Mom.

Hope this helps,

 

Post # 8
Member
939 posts
Busy bee

My daughter jsut turned 4 and while some days I just can’t wait for it to be her bedtime, she is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me. SO wasn’t home the other night so I let her sleep in bed with me and I woke up so happy because I got to see her sweet sleeping face. yeah I’m tired a lot, but I was tired a lot before I had her and now I get to spend tons of time with this amazing hilarious little person, who is pretty much the coolest person I’ve ever met and makes me laugh constantly. 

Post # 9
Member
6644 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

This is what it is all about!  He is my everything… Laughing

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