(Closed) How has your relationship with your SO changed you for the better?

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - Heinz Chapel Ceremony, Museum Reception

That is such a good question, tessabella! I really think my FH is the kindest, most selfless person I’ve ever met. He always, always, always thinks of others first and what he can do to make the important people in his life happy. He prioritizes my happiness above anything else in his life. I tend to be a very organized, goal/task-driven, efficient, "get the job done" type of person, and I’m also really stubborn, which is good in some ways, and not good in others. He has really taught me to compromise, to apologize sincerely and unconditionally when I’ve done something wrong, to forgive quickly, and to go to great lengths for people I love.

Post # 4
Member
997 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - The Pierre Hotel

Great question! The biggest change I can think of is related to how FH and I are different.  He is quick to make decisions and take action, while I like to deliberate before making a decision.  Both qualities have their pluses and minuses, but I think that I have become a little more "take-charge" and unafraid to jump into situations, while FH has started thinking through his decisions a little more.  A good balance!

Post # 5
Member
2365 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Ok. I could just copy and paste your post Tessabella! I really have changed for the better. My family values definitely got stronger, he has taught me how to be more polished and woman like … instead of a child, lol. We go to church together, so he strengthened that connection too.

Post # 6
Member
1379 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

One thing I do MUCH less then I used to is talk badly about other people.  I never really said terrible things (okay maybe sometimes, but I was a b*tchy college girl at that time) … but he is so anti speaking badly about others, and he is who I talk to 90% of the time!  So it’s just something I have really stopped doing, and it feels great!

Post # 7
Member
1037 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club

I really really like your post!

My FI has definitely changed me for the better! Not to say that I was ever a bad person, but he is pretty much one of the most genuine people I have ever met in my life…he’s one of those people that you just can’t get mad at…well, 1, because he never does anything to make me mad, and 2, even if he does, I know he doesn’t do it out of meanness! I know that he has made me more patient, and definitely more family-oriented. I have a wonderful family, and I am really close to my parents, but his family is extremely conservative, and family time at his house is something I have never experienced before (lunch every Sunday after church, gathering for all holidays, etc).  It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to see that there are families out there like his (even though I still feel pretty awkward attending family things at this point…I’m much more liberal than the rest of his fam!).

I could go on…there are so many other reasons why he makes me a better person… 

Post # 8
Member
1016 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I think this is a great idea for a post!

FI is one of the kindest, most thoughtful and generous people I’ve ever met.  Because of him I am learning to take things a little more slowly (although not as slow as he might be sometimes…chronically late!) and to enjoy the little things.  We always take time to have a little cuddle after work to talk about our day and to ‘soak up’ one another after being apart (we don’t  live together).  We go for drives looking for deer in the hills around Dublin, checking out the sky for satellites and have even gone out with night vision goggles to try and see badgers and hares.  Just enjoying the little things – I never would have done those kinds of things before and I really appreciate that change in me.

Post # 10
Member
2856 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

TessaBella, this really is a great post!

I can say that my FI has definitely changed me and mostly for the better. He is such a kind hearted, laidback, REAL person and he has made me more humble about life in general. Knowing what he has been through and still being sane is a tremendous accomplishment .

I stated that he has changed me mostly for the better because there is one thing different about me that I am not too keen on. As mentioned above, my FI is a laidback man. Sometimes too laid back. As for me, I am a person that likes to be organized and have plans set (not set in stone but should be existent) so with him I am finding myself to be a little controlling which I have never been. It is something that I have learned since being with him and quite frankly I HATE it! I am really not that bad but I get frustrated when things are left in the air and noone knows what is going on. I have learned though to be a little more laidback.

Anyone else find themselves with a personality that is foreign to them once they have been with their man?

Post # 11
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2008

This is a great thread…

I am more certain of what I want now, I think. I’m stronger but I’m also gentler… he showed me how (and encourages me constantly) to not take crap from people, but we also follow pretty traditional gender roles so I feel like I am free to be more feminine because he can handle the masculine stuff. I’m a better driver, because he is really good and I.. um.. was not, and since we started dating I mostly drove his car, not having my own — had to be more responsible! I am definitely smarter than I was thanks to him, and I am more logical and rational. I understand the world better. Sometimes I’m not sure how much was just growing up (we started dating when I was 18) or what was his influence, but either way I’m a much more defined and a stronger person than I was at 18 and whatever he helped with I love him for forever.

I also cuss a bit more, because he was a sailor. Whoops. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
952 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I’m a nicer person now than I was before we started dating. I had some real issues at work before we were together. I still do, but now it doesn’t get to me as much (well, most of the time). I am more patient and kind. He’s made me a better person, that’s for sure!

Post # 13
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

What a great question! I am more patient and kind, less sarcastic and cutting. Also more calm and content about the future 🙂 AND better with my money etc as he is and it’s rubbing off!

Post # 14
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I’ve become more patient since being with FI. 😉 But really! I have always had such a quick temper and he is SO KIND to me when I do things that I would have been angry with him for DAYS for, so I’ve found myself trying to be less careless of his feelings when I’m angry. It carries over into other areas of my life, too.

Post # 15
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I’m definitely more comfortable with my body image, even though since we started dating and I went on the pill, I’ve gained 20 pounds.

I also try harder to be nice, and I just like myself a lot more than I did before. =) 

Post # 16
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I totally agree with everything you said, Tessabella!

My DH keeps me grounded. When I let things really eat at me, he helps me realize that i’m taking things too personally or seriously and drags me out of that hole. I tend to let sometimes the littlest things ruin my day, and I love that he just agrees with me about X being retarded so that I can move on =] 

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