Post # 1
Hey Hive! This is an issue I have been grappling with since my FI and I got engaged. As much as I am looking forward to getting married (I really can’t wait!), one thing that is going to be unbelievably hard about our wedding day is that I won’t have my Dad there; he passed away when I was a teenager. So much of the wedding day centers around the bride and the father of the bride, and I’m actually pretty nervous about keeping it all together on what is already going to be a super emotional day. I mean, I’m even getting emotional writing this post! I plan on having my two nephews (they’ll be 9 and 11 at the time of our wedding) walk me down the aisle, and in lieu of the daughter/father dance, we are going to do a tribute dance in which we invite all of the couples to the dancefloor (especially the father/daughter guests) and play one of his favorite songs. Just wondering what some other brides in my position have done/plan to do to honor a parent or close relative that has passed away. I want to honor and remember him without making everyone (especially my mom) depressed or sad in any way….I know that that’s the last thing he would have wanted. I would appreciate any ideas anyone may have! Thanks hive 🙂
Post # 3
We honored two of our deceased family members at our wedding with memory candles and by adding a personal note about them in our programs.
I had a friend who lost her father before her wedding. Her mother walked her down the aisle and carried a beautiful candle/lantern sort of thing to represent her father walking with her. It was beautiful and they noted it in the program so all the guests would know what it meant. Then the candle/lantern was placed on the seat where her father would have been.
Just an idea.
Post # 4
We’re going to do a memorial table at the ceremony/reception (haven’t decided which) with an engraved vase of his favorite flowers, a framed poem, and my brother is going to draw a picture of him.
Post # 5
Really nice ideas! Thanks ladies 🙂
Post # 6
I’m working on the same issue, although I have a deceased grandmother and uncle. I am going to have the officiant say a few words after he welcomes everyone to our wedding that will include those people as well as those who couldn’t make the journey. I’m a little worried about tearing up at this part — as I have done at a recent wedding — but I think it’ll be worth it to have something said.
It’ll go like, "the couple wants to thank each of you for being with them today. They’d also like to acknowledge those family members who were unable to join them, the grandparents XYZ as well as others who couldn’t join us in our location." You get the gist. I like the idea of a memorial table for your dad, though.
Post # 7
I’m making a note in my programs to honor deceased members of our immediate family. If i see anything too intense, i’ll probably start bawling since i lost my brother only a year and 2 months ago. But, we are having acoustic guitar music in his honor and I know he’d appreciate that because he always said he’d play at my wedding.
Post # 8
Yeah, we’re definitely going to put something in our programs….I really probably wouldnt even have a program if I didn’t want to mention something about my Dad in it. I just need to make sure that I don’t read the program the morning of the wedding! I’m definitely not gonna need any help getting emotional that day. It’ just really tough….like all of you, I’m sure you never pictured your wedding day without the loved ones you lost…sort of feel like it keeps me from being completely over the moon about the whole thing. Don’t get me wrong…I love my FI and can’t wait to marry him….just wish my Dad could be there too. Lke all of you said, I want to honor him….but don’t want to be a mess of tears all day long either.
Post # 9
We are doing a memory table that will have photos of loved ones that have past away. We are incorporating this into our ceremony. Our Junior Bridesmaids will be carrying (escorting) framed photos of our loved ones down the aisle and will set up the photos on the table.
During the ceremony, the Jr. BMs are going to ready poem dedicated to our loved ones that passed on and then will be lighting a candle that, in theory, will stay lit during the whole wedding.
In addition, one of my BMs passed away at the end of February and I am still listing her on my program as one of the BMs and will be putting a footnote about her passing.
Post # 10
We’re doing a memorial table for my maternal grandmother, a person who was very special to both of us. There will be a single Bird of Paradise in a vase on a memorial table close to the altar in the church, along with a framed photograph of her and I.
I am also wearing a 5-strand crystal necklace which once belonged to her to keep her close to my heart throughout the day and we’re setting up a standing mirror I inherited from her in the dressing area of the church so that the first time I see myself fully dressed, I am in her mirror.
She absolutely loved weddings and it hurts to know that she isn’t going to be there. But I think symbolic items throughout the day make their memory specialand reminds you to keep them in your heart throughout the day.