How i overcame Postpartum depression & new mom struggles.

posted 3 years ago in Babies
Post # 2
Member
279 posts
Helper bee

Wow, what a powerful testament to your bravery and commitment to your son. 

I struggled with breastfeeding as well after a 46 hour labor and tons of magnesium sulfide. I didnt turn to formula until he was a month old, and was still a pound below his birthweight. At that point we began supplementing and I have never regretted it, in spite of the awful feelings of failure at a time when I was already very low. My baby too made a major change when he wasnt starving all the time, and my life changed without pumping non-stop. We bf’d and did formula until he was six months old and one day refused to bf anymore.

I was one of my first friends to have a child and got completely blindsided by the challenges. Thank you for talking about it and hopefully you have given some new mothers confidence or at least a sense they aren’t alone. Best of luck to you and your son!

Post # 3
Member
279 posts
Helper bee

Also, I learned that every mother I’ve ever talked to has regrets. But please don’t be ashamed. We each walk our own path and to me, I think that you should be proud to have done everything you could to care for a challenging little person when you could barely care for yourself. Your reflection and honesty show that you are a very self aware mother. And in spite of the hard parts, now and into the future, your love for him truly shines through.

Post # 4
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Thank you for this open & honest post. I’m so happy for you and your amazing ability to power through the struggles all in the name of your son.

I myself are in a bit of an up & down battle with motherhood. I had an intense labour which caused my son to be born not breathing, having had aspirated his meconium (ie. he had his first poop during labour & it ended up in his lungs). They worked on him for 1/2hr while I was still in stirrups & he was whisked away in an incubator without me even seeing him. In NICU after we thought he was recovering, he had a seizure whilst I was in the room. I cannot even begin to describe what was going through my head.

I had to leave him in hospital whilst I was discharged & it was incredbly hard & also surreal. The whole 7 days he was there it felt like I didn’t even have have a child. The nurses looked after him, I couldn’t touch him at my free will & I wasn’t able to breastfeed because of the tubes.

Coming home and having sleepless nights, problems settling, not being able to keep up with the demands of feeding I broke down many times & the thought crossed my mind that I had made the biggest mistake of my life. This still disturbs me that it happened. I feel like I missed the whole first week of his life & had a lot of issues making a connection with him. The moments with him feel like a blur & I regret the feelings I had.

It is comforting to know there are others going through this & they are making it through to the other side. It gives me hope. I wish you all the best with your precious little one.

Post # 5
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

 

Thank you for this, and also for making me discover the alpha parent’s website. I shed some tears reading through, I can relate to this as I have also had multiple problems with breastfeeding, although I do not have thyroid issues, neither did I have a PPD, or so I think. I salute your courage, and wish you the best with your son, you both are beautiful.

Post # 6
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Wow. Thank you for sharing.. Yours is such a powerful story.

Post # 7
Member
8518 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

 

MrsHoneyC:  Thank you for sharing! So raw and emotional, it made me tear up. I’m so glad you’re both doing better now. And Ryland is so cute!

Post # 8
Hostess
3787 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

MrsHoneyC:  Hey lady, I’ve been thinking about you. Thanks for taking the time and energy to share this with all of us. You are so brave and so strong. I’d like to think I could have made my way through all of that, but the truth is – I don’t know. I’m sorry you regret some moments of the first few months, but I think all parents have times like that. I’m sure you’ll have a few more as baby Ryland grows up. But you are an amazing mother! One more time: You’re an amazing mom! I’m so glad that you’re both doing well now. 

And holy crap – beautiful photos. Do you have a photographer follow you around everywhere? lol. Seriously, you’re so pretty even in the hospital. It’s not fair to the rest of us regular humans. ; )

Post # 9
Member
8821 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Wow, I can see myself in so much of your story.  Thank you for sharing it!

Post # 10
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

MrsHoneyC:  Thank you so much for sharing your journey. While I would never wish your story on anyone, it is comforting to know that if something like this happens it isn’t the end of the world nor does it make you a bad mother. Depression is something that is never talked about, so you have no idea how much I appreciate this. Thank you.

Post # 11
Member
49 posts
Newbee

MrsHoneyC:  thank you for sharing. We have so much in common…babies born in dec, high Bp, trouble feeding, thrush, blood in stool, milk allergy, and depression! I have a very personal question and totally understand if you don’t want to share but it’s something I’m struggling with. Given everything you’ve gone through, how do you feel about having more kids?

Post # 12
Member
1048 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

MrsHoneyC:  I want to commend you for working through your struggles.  However, you rarely mention your husband except he was out of town sometimes.  Why was he not there to help you get through this so you weren’t so “alone” in your misery?  I hope he was there for you despite you not mentioning him in your article.

I had similar issues with BF’ing, except I was a single mom in a state thousands of miles away from family.  I ended up having to resign from my job and then moving across the country when my son was 6 weeks old so I could get some additional support.  My son never learned to latch on properly, so I ended up pumping for 6 months straight.

Post # 13
Member
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Thank you for sharing your heart-wrenching story, and congratulations on making it to the other side of all those initial hardships. You’re an infinitely strong person to have made it through what you did, and without a partner present for much of it.

We had weight gain and breastfeeding issues here, too, with my daughter born at 37 weeks, but they were a walk in the park compared to what you described. Still, I had several weeks filled with tears, exhaustion, fear and obsession over hours, ounces and pounds, and then oral surgery for our LO and 2 more weeks of healing, round-the-clock exercises, and suck retraining. We’re sold the idea that breastfeeding is natural and should therefore come easily, but it so rarely does. I’ve heard that the timeframe for everything to finally fall into place is 3-6 months. The early weeks can be hell, as you know. And that’s just for the breastfeeding component.

I hope time will help ease your guilt and regrets. When I look at those photos of you and your son, I see love, and that’s all he will take away from these early months. Big hugs to both of you.

 

Post # 14
Member
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Thanks for sharing your story 🙂

very familiar feelings 

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