(Closed) How involved is your FI with the wedding planning?

posted 6 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: On a scale of 1-5 how involved is your FI with the wedding planning? (5 being most involved)
    1 : (20 votes)
    15 %
    2 : (33 votes)
    24 %
    3 : (32 votes)
    24 %
    4 : (33 votes)
    24 %
    5 : (17 votes)
    13 %
  • Post # 3
    2781 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    My Fiance has been involved with everything, and will continue to be with the only exception being my gown and my BMs dresses. 

    Our system seems to be that i do all the research of things (reception venues, djs, etc.) and we go through the info together, then he calls up the vendors to set up meetings. For example, for reception venues, I had actually had a list of every single space in our city listing the price for rental, catering and any extras they offered, so it made our decision making that much easier being able to automatically cut any place that was out of budget and focus only on the ones that were best for us.

    I’ve been doing this for everything, i started gathering info the day we picked out my ring together and that was before he proposed. We currently have our ceremony space rented, our reception venue rented, our centerpieces picked out and our wedding colours and meal picked out. 

    Post # 4
    5011 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I did research on everything and he and I made all the decisions together, if that makes sense. He was definitely involved, but not as obsessed with details as I was.

    Post # 5
    1042 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @SpecialSundae:  So far, this is what Fiance and I have done.

          Fi doesn’t really like to make the decision, but he wants to come with me, and give his opinions if he has any. Generally, he doesn’t care that much about little things (like centerpieces), but he did/does want to see and help with the venue, church, food, booze and entertainment.

    Post # 6
    396 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    My fiance helped design our save-the-dates, and he proofread our invitations/reply cards/info cards, etc.   

    If we need to make a decision, I’ll do the research and present him with 2 or 3 options.  I think it’s best that way since my fiance is very analytical (it literally takes him 3-4 months to pick out a cell phone), and it would take weeks for anything to be finalized.  Lol!

    He told me what he’d like to see in my dress, but I wasn’t giving him options with regard to that.  That decision was all mine! 

    Post # 7
    443 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    My Fiance really wants to be involved, but he is not so great on follow through 😛 So in order to make him feel involved I tend to do all the research for what we want to do and then come to him with the options and get his opinion.

    What really annoys me though is when after I research options and decide to go in a differet direction he gets frustrated because that isn’t what we originally planned. He is usually pretty flexible but sometimes its annoying. Im guess it is a good thing he cares thought right?LOL

    I also have handed over booking the hotel blocks for guests, and contacting the travel agent for the honeymoon. Lets hope these get done!

    Post # 8
    9142 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    My FH is good with the ideas and details and making decisions about what he wants.  He is also good about calling vendors for me.

    Post # 10
    478 posts
    Helper bee

    Hardly at all. Like others I may present him with a set of options andhe’ll give his opinion, but that’s hardly any work at all. It almost doesn’t count in my opinion ESP since most of the time he just thinks what I prefer is fine anyway. I’m actually annoyed. Sometimes I assign him tasks. Because of course he wouldn’t take the initiative to do anything on his ow , and he doesn’t do them or does them half assed. It’s so frustrating to me 

    Post # 11
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    my Fiance is more involved then i thought he would be…hes helped pick out about 75% of things except my dress…he has seen my shoes tho.

    he even helped the BMs make a decision and hes helped with most of the DIYS…some of the ideas where his- and he gets upset if i dont consult me

    hes even watched MFW and 4 weddings with me to get ideas..total shocker!

    Post # 12
    2227 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    Because I spent all summer planning while he was at work, I ended up making suggestions about things he hadn’t even began thinking about. It made for a situation where I got 100% of what I wanted without really having to talk about competing ideas. I put him in charge of 2 things: DJ & his/groomsmen’s suits. Both of us were very happy with this breakdown & Mr Rugbee didn’t feel left out since I consulted him on all the decisions I made.

    Post # 13
    1190 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    He wasn’t overly involved. I did all the research and contacted all the vendors then when I got all the details and prices I told him about it and we somewhat made a choice together (went with the best price!)

    He was super involved with picking our first dance song. 

    Post # 14
    870 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I voted 3.  I do most of the planning but he has input and I don’t make any major decisions without his okay first, with the exception of stuff like my attire and flowers.  He doesn’t want to know anything about my dress and really doesn’t care about flowers.

    Post # 15
    5007 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    1, since zero isn’t an options!! He just wants to get married and would be totally happy eloping in Vegas, but I want a wedding and he wants to make me happy, so he just smiles and agrees to most things. He is apparently very opinionated about his suit though, which I was surprised about since he isn’t really fashion conscious! He wants to do the tasting and is excited about the honeymoon, but other than that he doesn’t care. I don’t care that he doesn’t care either, so it works out fine! 

    Post # 16
    257 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    Very!  He was a bit annoyed he didn’t get a say in the wedding gown haha.  He wants to have a say on everything – even bridesmaid dress (but we agreed to give my sister 100% of the decision on that one as she’s the only BM).  I think maybe the only thing he let me have more of a say in was the invitations.  Everything else he has pretty strong opinions on!  I probably do more of the research, just because that’s my nature and then we sit and review it all and make a decision together.

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