Post # 1
Last night me & my husband were sitting in bed and I was telling him a story about work that day. It involved me talking to another guy at my work, and my husband met him before randomly at a coffee shop we were in one day. And my husband was like, “Was he hitting on you?” And I said no, we were talking about WORK. Thing is, he asks me this a lot. I don’t know if it’s jealousy or insecurity (WHICH I HAVE NO IDEA WHY HE NEEDS TO BE INSECURE AT ALL!) but sometimes it makes me mad. Like I wish he would just stop asking me such a dumb question.
I would say he’s more jealous than I’d like him to be, but he has come a long way. I don’t think he’s abnormal jealous, as in telling me what to wear or controlling when I go out or who I see…but I was curious as to what the situation was like in other bee’s relationships?
Post # 3
Fiance doesn’t really care at all. One time I was telling him a story about a guy I work with, and I probably spoke about him really affectionately and he looked a little alarmed before I told him the guy is in his 80s, lol. That’s the only time FI’s ever expressed anything even close to jealousy.
That would irritate me too, but hopefully he’s at least getting better about it. :/
Post # 4
Hmm. It’s a bummer that he bugs you with those questions, but kudos to the progress you say he’s made. As long as it’s not a controlling or abusive jealously, I’d suggest trying to just remember that he lo-oves you. 🙂
I don’t really get questions like that from my fiance. I’d say I’m the slightly more insecure one, though I try not to be vocal about it.
Post # 5
Darling Husband makes comments when I say I had the best patient ever but when he finds out it was some 80 or 90 year old guy he doesn’t care 🙂
The only time I have seen him up in arms has been when we have been out at bars, I don’t know why people feel the need to get all touchy feely when my husband is with me.
Post # 6
I voted “very jealous – and it bothers me.” My bf is not quite as jealous as the last two guys I dated, which is at least good. But maybe slightly more than the average guy. But this is the first relationship he’s been in, so I can’t exactly fault him for sometimes being a little paranoid. But it still bothers me.
Post # 6
I’m with Gemstone on this one I can be more insecure than my Hubbyn at times. He’s not very jealous at all. It took some getting use to but I like this way better than the over jealous type!
Post # 7
Mr.G is not jealous at all, and I absolutely love it! I’ve had very insecrure exes (partly the reason why they’re an ex) and it’s a breathe of fresh air to have complete trust with him.
Some jealousy is ok as long as it’s not unhealthy, or unreasonable, but not the full out “oh my god you talked to a guy, never talk to him ever again”
Post # 8
@Gemstone: Yeah. He’s definitely one of those types who needs reassurance. I’m not one to be all “omg I love you you are so beautiful times infinity thousand” and he praises me like I am some kind of Goddess and there is not a day that goes by he doesn’t tell me he thinks I’m beautiful or hot. So I’d probably lean more towards insecure. But I only married him for his looks, so I don’t know where he gets that 😉 LOL
Post # 9
I think my Darling Husband is more jealous than he lets on.. it’s when he admits it that I realize how much so. Honestly, if you are noticing your Darling Husband is a little jealous, I’d try to reaffirm him. I know that no matter how much I trust my husband, if he was around girls all day that were flirting with him, I’d get insecure and want affirmation from him that I was #1. I’m sure you feel like you do that – but who doesn’t love more affirmation from their spouse?!
Post # 10
@michkarose: Yeah. I guess you’re right. He hasn’t ever cut off my relationships with anyone.
@oracle: I definitely need to do more affirmation.
Post # 11
My SO doesn’t care at. all. I’m still quite close friends with some of my exes-something I have been very open about from the beginning-and it doesn’t bother him. We just have an unparalleled level of trust and committment with one another.
Post # 12
J is definitely the jealous type, but as he says, “you’re with me and I know you would never do anything to hurt me so it doesn’t matter”. I don’t mind him being jealous except when I talk to my one guy friend that lives in NC and he always has snide comments to make about it. I understand why he’s the way that he is, but he always throws it in my face that he doesn’t talk to other girls because he doesn’t want me feeling jealous/insecure.
Post # 13
I voted for “not jealous at all and I like it” but that isn’t exactly true. I just think he is somewhere between “not at all” and “kind of.” I feel like he is jealous only in appropriate situations… I’ve never felt that he was unreasonable… but I also never felt like he didn’t care.
Post # 14
@deetroitwhat: Haha. Bless his heart. Maybe if you can find subtle ways of reassuring him on your own, he won’t have to ask all the questions?
Post # 15
@MissHobbit: Does complete trust = no jealousy. I don’t know. I don’t think signs of jealousy equate to lack of trust. I think it’s kind of a leap. But I get what you’re saying!
@DesireeAnne: All my close guy friends are gay lol. My one close friend Andy who I talk to on the phone husband is cool with and hasn’t given me problems about. But if he made snide comments, it would bother me too!
@CorgiTales: I think because I am generally not jealous, he can sometimes feel like I don’t care. His ex-gf was psycho jealous checking his email and crap, and I just… am not like that.