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When do you plan on having your first child? Or when did you have your first? I know the poll options are pretty cut-and-dry, so they don't cover every scenario.
Feel free to share why or stories! I'll add mine later, though a lot of you probably know. Lol.
ETA: If TTC isn't the right place for this thread, feel free to move it! :)
ETA2: I know this is all guesswork. Just thought it'd be nice to discuss and learn the "why's" and whatnot. :)
Well I was married at the end of November last year and am due at the end of june this year. So exactly 19 months. this was not planned though, we had planned on waiting 3-4 years lol
Baby McK is due on August 10th, which will be 3 months before our 2nd anniversary...so 21 months.
Personally, I'm on the fence on whether I really want kids or not. Somedays I kind of want ONE, and others, I get nervous thinking about them. That's probably normal.
I never really understood the innate need some people have to immediately get pregnant right after their weddings-- I always envisioned myself spending the honeymoon phase enjoying my husband's company. We didn't live together before the wedding, so it's been nice to just soak up time with him. I suppose it's different for others who lived with their fiancees for years before marriage. Our PLAN was to maybe consider a baby in about 3-5 years. We will evaluate then and decide if it's sensible. Sometimes thiings don't go according to plan though, so we'll see. :-)
@Mrs Sarah McK: I'm going to thread jack for a minute-- When did you find out you were pregnant, and how far along were you on your date of discovery? Just curious. :-) Congrats on the little one.
@JulesSchnooks: I think a lot of it has to do with age, also. FI and I have lived together for almost 3.5 years, but we are younger (early 20's) and are pretty much to a point where babies are 4+ years down the road. We had a discussion the other day, and we're both comfortable waiting that long even with my fertility issues. We'll have been together almost 10 years at that point, which sounds crazy.
@simpleandchic: Lol! Well congrats. :) We would be happy/fine with a surprise, but for time constraint reasons (grad school) will probably try our hardest to postpone.
We've been TTC for a year now, and our two year wedding anniversary is in May. So it'll be at least two years before we have a baby, though if we had gotten pregnant our first cycle, it would have been more like 1 year.
@JulesSchnooks: Thank you! I was just about 4 weeks along when I tested on December 1st, 2011.
We don't want to wait long, we will be married early 2013 and want our baby by early 2014. For us, our marriage is a way of saying "we want to be together forever, AND we want to create a family".
well we've been married 1 1/2 years so far, and I'm not pregnant, so it'll be at least 2 years before a baby ;) more seriously, I'd like to start trying soon, and dh has floated the idea of starting this summer--I'm trying not to put too much weight on that since it was sort of an arbitrary idea of when he might be feeling ready, and thinking about an exact time makes me impatient and makes him feel pressured, so we've stopped thinking of that as a time line. but my guess is about 3 years in. by the end of this semester, I'll be done with the taking-classes portion of my phd, and by the summer I'll be on to qualifying exams and dissertation grant-writing/prospectus writing. it'd be a little nuts to be pregnant then, and then have a baby while I'm doing dissertation research, but at least my schedule will be more flexible than if I were still taking classes or had a "real" job
@finnaroo: We are vaguely talking about the last year of my Ed.S.
I have 2 things to pick....
1. Less than 2 years (we were married 3mth when we started trying.... took 1st try)
2. I came with a kiddo and wanted more
Can you change the poll to accept multiple answers?
ETA: DH and I are both on the younger side for TTC... I'm 26 with this as my 2nd and DH is 21. We just knew we were ready. =)
Well... ours was unplanned but it was about 8 months. We got married in October 2010, I got pregnant in July 2011.
I think it very much depends on age. We're 31 and 42 and started TTC right away. If we had gotten married in my early 20s we would have waited quite awhile.
We are trying to decide when to TTC...I am on hormonal birth control but recently had a *surprise* pregnancy. I lost it a few weeks later, and it was crazy how much that changed my attitude about having a baby. I think I said every curse word in the book when I found out because I hadn't planned it, but after I had a little while to get used to the idea, I started getting a little excited. I wasn't sure how to feel after I lost it.
I am 24, DH is 25. I'm a teacher, he works in public safety/emergency management at a hospital (and makes about what I do). We own a pretty small 2 bedroom home. DH is going to be finishing his undergrad degree (that he gets while also working) this fall. He has been thinking of going to nursing school but that would mean no more working for him and thus, no baby for us for at least two or three more years. We could definitely have one baby where we are, but two would be a tight squeeze and we can't afford a bigger home for a few more years.
Can't decide whether we want to go out on a limb and go for it or wait three or four years for him to maybe do nursing school and hopefully get a little salary increase. Hmmm.
We have been married 1.5 years and are planning to wait another 2-3.5 years to TTC. So we'll have been married 3.5-5 years by the time we do.
Not married yet but BF and I are aiming to have a baby 5 and under years from now (AKA 5 years max) because BF is older than me by 13.5 years and doesn't want to be super old when he has his first child. This is fine by me because 5 years from now puts me at my ideal age to start having kids :)
I told him we had to be married before we started TTC so yeah. I don't know when he'll propose and we'll get married so I can't exactly answer the poll! I'd like to wait at least a year after marriage but if we don't get married until 4.5 years from now then we will start TTC right after marriage!
We won't be waiting longer than 6 months to TTC so hopefully we'll have a baby within 1-2 years after our wedding.
I'd say at least 4 years for us; FI is almost 30, but I'll be turning 25 a few weeks after the wedding and I just feel way too young for baby lol! Plus I only graduate from (law) school this spring, definitely want to spend a few years enjoying being with my husband, exploring a new city, establishing myself in my career, etc. I do have my fingers crossed for a fur-baby at some point much sooner though!
We'll be married for 25 months by the time our baby arrives! If we had it our way it would be much sooner than that.
We're planning to start TTC January 2013 at 1.5 years after marriage - so baby will be born at least 3 months after 2 year mark.
6+ years from now, and we have been married just over a year. Going to get through graduate school, a couple of moves and some decisions about whether even want children. I imagine yes, after we finish some adventures and accomplishments, we will bring a baby into the mix.
So, I read your post and decided to ask FI, since he's sitting next to me playing call of duty. We want to try to have 2 kids before I'm 30 (25 this year), because my family has a history of heart problems I don't want to run into. He said if we haven't started trying actively between wedding and 1 yr anniversary, that he'll want to actively start trying on our 1yr anniversary, but if we all the sudden stop wearing condoms between then (well if he stops wearing them obviously I'm not wearing one 
then that must mean we're ready.
Silly lawgirl goes, "so I'm not trying to be funny or anything, but isn't that an active decision that you want a baby because you all the sudden don't want to wear a condom!?!"
No option to have had zero children and want zero children?
We have two cats and we're happy.
I voted 4-6 years. We're both almost 26 and we'd like to shoot for 29/30. We're almost definitely going to have some issues conceiving so we may start to get the ball rolling in a few years.
@caits615: The thread doesn't really apply to those who are opting to not have children.
This is a fairly hot-topic in our household. We are still sort of on the fence about kids and whether we want one or two.
The basic answer is that we will have kids when we are financially ready. DH's main job is seasonal (for now) and we would like to be in a house. We can't get the house until DH is promoted to year-round.
I am super enjoying the "honeymoon" phase of our relationship, since we only we moved intogether 7 months ago when we got engaged. It was wedding planning 24/7, it seemed, with little time to really savour our time together.
But on the other hand, I feel like the older I get, the less energy I have. Also, as the bread winner, it is only going to get harder and harder for me to take mat. leave. I am probably 2-3 years away from a major promotion and mat leave could definitely hamper that. Financially, I NEED the promotion though.
We are 28, almost 29 now, and have decided if by the time we are 35 we aren't ready, we will just be our own little chlidless family :)
And I CURSE law school every day for financially ruining me. My student debt from that terrible decision has seriously limited my options in so many aspects :(
@SarahSmilesDec28: Graduating with my JD in oh a little over 100 days. From a top 20 school too. Kicking...myself...everyday..... Oh well. We're making a big move in cities which will hopefully have more opportunities for me to get a job.
Unfortunately, my family has a history of heart issues, so I don't have the option to wait a few years and hope it doesn't creep up. So, I'll be new lawyer, trying to buy a house, and make baby. Stress city should be my middle name somedays!
@lawgirl12: My problem is that I didn't stick with private practice, I moved to government. It's a catch-22 though... no time/flexibility in private practice to have a baby and now that I have more time in government, I have no money! Damned if you do...
DH and I had just start dating when I left the firm 2 years ago, so things might have been different if we had met earlier!
our one year anniversary is in April, and our baby is due in May.
we planned on waiting 2 years, so we are a year ahead of schedule! ;)
DH and I started actively TTC two months after our wedding but I came off the Pill about two weeks after we got married.
DH (then just my BF) started to get the baby rabies in late 2009 and although I always knew I wanted kids, it took me another 9-12 months to come to terms with starting a family. We had a trip to the US planned for April 2010 (go Disneyland!), so I told DH that we could start negoations re: a baby (and marriage) once we got home from our trip.
Fast forward to early May 2010, one afternoon I decided that I was ready to work on a family so I proposed to DH in the car on the way home from work(very romantic I know). The conversation actually went something like "so I think we should have a baby, but we need to get married first, what do you think?".
It might be old-fashioned, but I wasn't prepared to TTC without being married, so pretty much once the wedding ring went on, the BC went off!
Fast forward till January 2012 and after ten months off TTC, we got our BFP yesterday (a week shy of our first anniversary)!
@caits615: & @JustMarried51912: Not that that isn't a viable option for many, just not really relevant to the question as it's a TTC question. It was intended for those that do plan on having kids or think they may. :)
@Kemma: CONGRATS! Just yesterday? Wow.
@SarahSmilesDec28: & @lawgirl12: I know this is a dumb question, because I know Law School is expensive, but I take it we're talking a LOT of debt? And @lawgirl12 - FI says the same thing. "We don't have to use condoms anymore though right?" Um....Negative. My BC is still being worked out, as we aren't sure how to approach it now that my PCOS hormone issues are defined.
@UpstateCait: We are looking at 4-ish years too. You know our kids are going to be born on the same day or something right? That's just how it's gonna be since we're both awesome. ;) How do you know you'll have issues conceiving, if you don't mind me asking? That's a huge concern of ours too, yet we know we aren't quite there yet. Plus I want to travel some before kids! My birthday wishlist to FI this year: Alaska.
We're about to start TTC, so if all goes well the baby will come 1.5-2 years after the wedding. We're young too (22/23), but we've been together for a really long time. I'm a preschool teacher, so I'm around little kids all day long and I still want kids! So I suppose that's how I know I'm ready. DH just wanted to be a little more financially secure than we were when we were first married, and we've accomplished that.
If we ever get lucky, I would hope within two years. That would be my ideal! :)
@AmeliaBedelia: $101,000.35. And that's a public law school 
.
ETA: Exactly! What does, "let's not use any condoms, but let's not try to have a baby until the end of the year," even mean!?!?? haha silly man not going to fool me!
@SarahSmilesDec28: I've only ever interned at DA's offices so I know what you mean. I don't know how they have multiple kids etc. Well, they're always saying they have no money so that's probably how!
We aren't waiting to pay off law debt b/c that would obviously be a good 10yrs! Thankfully, FI is an accountant and they paid him to go to school. And no credit card debt is a blessing.
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