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I would do the rsvp date a week earlier than you would like to have them. I'd give a Aug 20-25 mail by date. You will be missing a lot at that point. That gives you ten days for the late ones to roll in with out stressing you out. Then it will give you a week to call all the people who didn't mail it in for your final count.
You will be surprised a how many people do not send it in especially family. And how long it takes for people to respond for to your call/email.
It's a week til my wedding. About 6 invites still haven't responded. We had to call about 20 invites. This is out of 100 invites sent.
We had a horrible time getting RSVPs back. We made our deadline 3 weeks before we needed to know with the caterer and now, just a few days before that, there are still a few people who refuse to return our emails/calls or give us a definitive "yes/no," but they're still hinting that they might come. We had to track down about 40% of our guest list after the deadline passed. I'd say August 26th.
I would say a month out. We had ours a month out and now it's about 3 weeks left and we still haven't heard from about half the guest list. I would be prepared to call people that don't respond. Some people just don't understand etiquette and that they should let you know even if they aren't planning on attending.
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I would say September 1st simply because its easier for people to remember that they have until the first of the month. That will still give you about 10 days to track down people that have not RSVP'd. My wedding is June 20th, we sent out our invites April 25th and have the deadline June 1st and our count has to be given to the venue on June 15th.
I would also have to say to go a month out. We had so many issues with people not sending back the RSVPs, and then had to call or email those who didn't. The more time you have to do that, the better. Even then, people still didn't respond, and we had to assume they were nos even though we weren't sure. You'll also have people call you the week before canceling or asking if they are able to bring a date. So frustrating! The first thing I do now when I receive a wedding invite is to RSVP!!!
I gave them a month, so I had one month before the wedding. Like you I had two weeks before the wedding to give a head count. Everyone was really good I think I had 5 days after the due date was when all the late people finally responded or got a phone call. Too bad there is always those last two people that want to personally ask if their friends can come or the parents want to add just one more. But that is another post!! If I had the option I would have done 1.5 months. There are those people that wait till the last minute to rsvp because they can.
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I am not quite sure what to do here...but am ordering my invitations now...I need to give my caterer a head count 2 weeks before the wedding, and know that sometimes the RSVP's come in late or I will need to call people. If my wedding is Sept 26th, and I have to give the headcount on Sept 12th when should I tell people they have to RSVP by? I was thinking Aug 26 or Sept 1st, to leave a few weeks between...is that too early? I am planning to mail the invitations ~ July 21st.