Post # 1
I was just wondering how long it was until you ladies considered yourself a waiting bee! Do you feel your previous relationships made it shorter because you knew what you were looking for? Did your age have anything to do with it? How long had you been together when you had a timeline conversation?
About me- I’m nowhere near being a waiting bee. I’m 21 and we’ve only been dating for 2.5 years. I’m out of school (job hunting) and my SO is in grad school. We have never had a conversation discussing our future together, much less a timeline. I didn’t even know that was a thing until stumbling upon this website a while back! Long-time lurker, first-time poster =)
Post # 3
I never considered myself waiting because I was never waiting to get married. I was going to be with my husband regardless of marriage or not. I had no reason to wait.
Post # 4
My SO asked my Dad for his blessing in July 2011 (together from May 2010). When it got to October and still nothing I officially considered myself a waiting bee, and I am still waiting.
Welcome to the hive! 🙂
Post # 5
@Hyperventilate: When I first came on this website a few months ago I must admit I was
“waiting” only because I wanted a ring on my finger and a wedding after seeing my SO’s brother and sister in law get engaged and plan a wedding- I saw how exciting it was and wanted to have a chance to go through those things….. but now I realize how materialistic that seems. Marriage or not, he is my one and only: marriage doesn’t determine that. I am no longer waiting or focusing on it, but still love this site!
Post # 6
@Stranger516: That’s how I saw it. I loved my husband purely and deeply, and I knew he was my one and only. Regardless if we got married, or engaged, or whatever, I wasn’t going anywhere because he was the one for me. Marriage was the best option for us for many reasons, but if he had never proposed, I’d still be with him til the end of days.
Post # 7
I think age is a huge factor. My DH and I had only dated about 2 1/2 months before it was clear we would marry (I was 45, he was 40). After that I just wanted the proposal timed so I could have enough time to plan a wedding properly for good weather! It ended up taking him about 9 months – his claim later was that yes, he knew we would marry but he had his own internal “schedule” he was adhering to. I think if I was in college or my early 20s I would likely have wanted to date longer.
Post # 8
SO and I both knew within two months of meeting that we would marry, and any discussion we have had on subject has always been serious. It was never really a question of IF…we just knew. I guess I started to consider myself officially waiting once he told my Mom that he has started looking for a ring. That was this past January….we met last March. He is 37 and I’m 30…. neither of us has been married before and never really considered it until we met each other. I think age and maturity is a factor.
Post # 9
@MissKebab: I started waiting after we celebrated our three years of dating anniversary. Originally I didn’t think I wanted to get engaged so soon but then we moved in together and I started to feel more and more ready for engagement. After 6 months of living together it was our 3 year anniversary and I asked about our timeline…and once I knew he wanted to do it in 2013 I became an anxious, waiting freak.
Post # 10
We were together for about 8 years before we started seriously talking about marriage (almost 9 years now). I didnt consider myself to be waiting until just under a year ago. Then again, we were together since we were very young.
Post # 12
If i remember correctly (I am on here way to much) you met and got married within a year. Do you think you’d still feel the same way if you were together 10+ years without marriage?
I was never focussed on marriage until we had been together 6 years and lived together for 2. We started looking at rings shortly after but it wasn’t until a year later that he proposed.
Post # 13
Realistically from about 6 years, that’s when we started discussing it seriously. Even more so in the last few months. We’re coming up to our 7 years but we are 23.
Post # 14
Together 6 years, mid/late-20s now. That we were together in school and “young” did matter. I think it stretched the timeline out.
We talked about marriage from about 2 years in. I wanted a ring about 3 years in but he wasn’t ready. I only joined the bee when I thought it was realistic that we would actually be engaged soon because he said he was looking for a ring. “Soon,” as I learned thereafter, does not mean what most people think it means when applied to waiting for an engagement because that was 10 months ago. I figure I might have a ring by 2014 but who knows.
Post # 15
We’ve been together almost 4 1/2 years now. We’re what some would consider young (22 and 21), but I wasn’t officially waiting until our last anniversary. The proposal is happening soon, before I graduate in May with my BFA, so it could happen any time now!
I was ready to get married way before he was, but I’m kind of glad he’s waited this long. We had discussed a timeline before, but it didn’t really start to amp up until this year. Now we talk about the upcoming proposal all the time and our wedding that we plan to have on our 5th year anniversary.
Post # 16
I wanted to start talking about engagement a little after 1 year, but I wasn’t sincerely “waiting” until closer to our 2 year anniversary.