- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
my guest list was at your count, and i have 5 girls, and he had 5 guys. (counting the MOH & BM)
Good idea on waiting :) I waited until i had 10 months left before I asked mine!
Good Luck!
We're having a smaller wedding (about 120-130), and we're having three each.
Our guest list is 200-250 and we are having 4 girls & 4 guys. (including MOH & BM)
Really good idea on waiting before you asked people to stand up. I am one of those people that asked right away and kinda regret it now.
3 gals for me, 3 guys for him, and we had 2 other guys who were ushers.
When we went to the local bridal expo, we were fascinated by one photographer's display...there was a huge picture of a bridal party taken in a commonly used atrium at the courthouse...the fascinating thing: there were like FOURTEEN! attendents...FOR EACH the bride and the groom!!! 
So, that's like a wedding party of 30 people!! I kid you not. We couldn't stop staring...the photog even came over and told us how many people there were 'cause he said everyone stops and tries to count the people.
Wow, 14 each is definitely a lot!!!! 
We're not having any kids in our wedding, so even if I do go with 7 bridesmaids, We'll have at the most 12 total, including FI's 5!
If I decide to just stick with the 5 I have, I do feel like I will need to address the matter with the two close friends who would have been #6 and #7. One of these friends was engaged several years ago, and unfortunately the engagement was called off, but I was to be one of her bridesmaids. I know there's no rule that if I was in hers she has to be in mine, but I think that's partly making me feel very guilty for considering NOT asking her. *Sigh* here I go again......
I was in a wedding with 12 each! It was a lot. But it didn't seem too crazy...
That said, we're having 2 each!
we waited 6+ months before asking anyone and we ended up asking 6 each, 7 friends & 5 siblings. our wedding will be about 150 people. If youre going to ask, do it soon. we asked our girls & guys over a period of a few weeks (since we waited to see all but 1 in person) and the last few knew we had asked others first which made it a little awkward. i still think it was better to wait & tell them in person though!
We got engaged 11 months before we got married. I asked my bridesmaids about 10 months before the wedding. We picked out dresses 7-8 months before the wedding, and ordered them 5 months before the wedding. We asked 3 girls & 3 guys, with an initial invite list of 150ish (which then grew to 170ish, and we had 120 guests come).
I settled on 3 because if I asked any more friends that would have opened up another social group, plus hubby easily picked 3 people but would have had a hard time choosing who to be in the wedding beyond that, and we wanted it to be matched (it ended up not being matched evenly because our Best Man couldn't get to the wedding due to military obligations... but that's another story).
I will add that 3 was an easy number to work with in terms of coordinating schedules for shower & dress stuff, not to mention attendant gifts were easier, and I could get them nicer stuff than if I had 10 attendants, plus we could get a smaller limo with a smaller wedding party.
Hi MissBlushing! Fellow Philly bride here! I think you should make the bridesmaid decision solely on your friendship with each girl (i.e., are these girls going to be in your life forever and who you want to stand up for you?). If you think so, then include them! We're having 9 bridesmaids and 5 groomsmen, and we're also hoping for about 180-200 guests. I've gotten some comments about the size of the wedding party and the un-evenness, but noone really cares. I also did not ask one girl whose wedding i was in. I guess one other consideration is the expense- more BMs means more bouquets, BM gifts, people at the rehearsal... plus it is so expensive to be a bridesmaid these days. But overall- I say add 'em in!
We have 5 bridesmaids and 5 groomsmen and 1 junior bridesmaid and 1 junior groomsmen.
I'm having 5 on each side plus a jr BM abd GM - and NO 7 is not too many! Who cares how big the wedding is, and how many someone else had. So you have more people you want to stand up with you - thats great! All those people who love you and have shared in your life, I think having as many as you want is just the right amount!
I was one of the brides that jumped the gun - I asked my 'maids the same week I got engaged. It's all worked out though. :) I have four total - two MoH's and two 'maids.
we had 150 guests and 7 attendants each. i used to wonder if we should have only had siblings (meaning 2 attendants each), because coordinating 7 people cross-country is difficult, and the more attendants, the more expensive it gets with gifts and whatnot...and the non-siblings would have understood if it was family only. but the non-sibling bridesmaids were much more helpful in planning, and i'm just as close to some of them as to my sisters. it didn't seem too large at the wedding, maybe because we didn't have a head table. i don't regret it one bit!
Let's see... I originally wanted close friends but not having his sisters in it was not an option. There was no doubt who my four girls would be. I've known 3 of them since elementary school and the other one since Jr. High. We've been through a lot together.. good and bad. I too count how many bridesmaids there are in a photo. It's nice to see some brides have many girls beside them. What I always wonder is will these girls stand by you many years from now.
AH!
I'm going to be the freak in those photos. Counting my fiance & I, there are 30 of us in the bridal party! We both have 14 attendants. We're Irish/Italian so we have large families - and we have lots of life long friends. Our wedding is going to be this August, a Saturday DAY wedding, with about 300 invites.
I'm having the same problem. As of right now, we're going to have 6 on each side. We narrowed it down from 8. The 6 is excluding a gf of mine that I've been friends with since I was 14. We had promised each other that we'd be each others bridesmaid.... but anything more than 6 seems like so much... esp since we're planning on having just 150-200 people. :(
we'll have about 100-120 people at our wedding... and we'll have two each. his two best friends, and then his sisters for mine. i couldn't begin to pick just two from my best friends for my side, so i stuck to family only.
wedding.jpg (46.4 KB, 132 downloads) 3 years old 
We had one person stand up for each of us, one flower girl, and one ring bearer for our 65 guests. We figured the more people we had to dress, the more of a headache it would be. :) If you're looking for an average, the "theys" say that one attendant each per 50 guests is about average.
You can have people your really care about as guests at your wedding and still get them involved. Just invite them into the bridal getting ready area for a private lunch, some girl time, and general support.
Good luck!
I've got 8 and its possible there will be nine! Its grown huge, but we're Southern and its a formal affair so it will be fine. I am buying the girls dresses (evening gowns really) though so its getting a bit pricy!
we are having a small ceremony in hawaii -just me and the future hubbs - for that we are not having any attendants.
our 400+ wedding in feb 2009 - we're having 11 BMs and GMs, i jr BM & GM; 3 FGs and 1 ringbearer
then we have our godparents - 4 couples, then one couple to drape a veil over us during the ceremony, another couple to light the unity candles and one last couple to drape a cord around us...
hmmm lemme do the math real quick...42!!! 42 people in our ceremony, excluding me and the hubbs...
runner1.jpg (96.1 KB, 239 downloads) 3 years old runner2.jpg (85.3 KB, 127 downloads) 3 years old
You can't worry about what other people think! seriously, you need to remember it is yours and your fiance's day.....we have 10 bridesmaids, 5 older and 5 younger, a flowergirl, a pageboy and 3 ushers, 15 altogether not including myself, fiane, dad & best man!
We probably did rush into the decision a bit too quick (well, I did, my fiance is easy with the decisions to be left to me) but I just couldn't decide, so we had them all! I have found dresses really cheap and gorgeous on ebay, so whereas some people wil spend £300 on 2 or 3 dresses, I am spending that on all 10, and they are gorgeous!!! It just means going easy on a few other things instead, like we won't be having a band as orginally planned, and renting rather than buying then mens suits, anythings possible, and you do what YOU want for your big day!!!
Good luck!!!
x
Martha_Stewart_Eyelet_Cards.jpg (4.3 KB, 182 downloads) 2 years old
I originally though 5, now I'm thinking either 3 or 4. No one has been asked yet. After spending more time with his spoiled rotten 18yo sister, I know for sure that she can not be part of my bridal party. She has a really good eye for design (and spending money) so I think I'll ask her to help me with the planning/decorating. Also a long time good friend from out of state may be house party instead of bridesmaid because of long distances and finances.
i estimate our guest list will bw 150-170 and i'm expecting about 130 to show up....
i originally only wanted 4 girls. but after evaulating my friendships....it went up to 6. there is only one maid that i have that i sorta regret, and thats my old college bf. but i asked her more to honor the relationship that we recently had, rather than honor the one we have now.
my FI only has 2 guys. we dont care about symmetry either. my 2 brothers + his 2 brothers will be ushers. not sure if i should count them in the grand BP count or not. 8 bms and gms, and 5 ushers.
I have 3 bridesmaids, 3 groomsmen, a ring attendant (adult), a flower girl, and a horn blower. We are having a destination wedding with 30 guests attending, and an at-home reception for 120.
Other than finances being an issue, i've heard that you should consider the size of your ceremony venue when you are deciding on the size of your wedding party because 30 people would look really squished in a small church, but 2 attendants would look pretty silly in a huge, dramatic cathedral.
I think you might regret having 7 - that's just that many more people to coordinate and buy presents for.
Some people might tell you to "honor" them by assigning them tasks like cake cutting and guest book attendant but unless they are crazy about all things wedding, I think that's more of a hassle than an honor. Unless you truly believe they will be mad at you for not making them bridesmaids I would just invite them and make sure to wholeheartedly thank them for coming and for their gifts. It will be easier on everybody involved!
bridal4small.jpg (124.5 KB, 267 downloads) 2 years old bridal1small.jpg (117.7 KB, 169 downloads) 2 years old
I agree with Carly and the other posters that say you cannot worry about how it appears. Have as many (or as few) bridesmaids as you want!
I have six bridesmaids for a wedding the same size as yours, but only because there were six girls I really wanted to be bridesmaids. I was not bound by a number at all! But, that being said, my girls are all very different and all have strong opinions, so it can be a struggle coming to a consensus between them, and a smaller number may have been easier to work with.
If you're on the fence about the last two bridesmaids, you could also consider including them in the ceremony in some other way (most often as readers).
blushpaperiewhimsicalscroll.jpg (136.7 KB, 113 downloads) 2 years old blushpaperiefeather.jpg (124.8 KB, 66 downloads) 2 years old blushpaperiefeather.jpg (124.8 KB, 59 downloads) 2 years old blushpaperiewhimsicalscroll.jpg (136.7 KB, 60 downloads) 2 years old
We're inviting about 150 people and I have 4 bridesmaids. I agree with what pp have said--its your wedding and don't worry about what others may think--have as many or as few bridesmaids as you want!
One thing that I didn't think of when I asked my BMs is my additional cost for each girl for random things. I already was planning on buying their dress and an addtl BM gift, but I forgot about things like BM bouquets, the rehearsal dinner (spot for them and their guest), hair and makeup, hostess gifts. If budget is an issue for you as it is for us, that may be something for you to consider.
To avoid the snarkiness between girls I'm only having 2 , my sister and my FSIL. I have two seperate groups of friends that don't mesh great and can get to bickering. This way there is not accusing of "favorites" . The one who is helping me the most knows I love her and why i'm doing it this way.Â
Can I ask how many you had in the end? I have the same sort of dilemma and am exactly the same as you- I change my mind every 5 minutes!
I feel like a huge number will be a bit scary on the day, like I might be thinking that everyone is looking at me thinking I am trying to be all showy and a bit of an idiot. However, when I think about not having all my friends with me I feel a bit sad. :-( We are in a group and so it is hard to choose people over others.
How many did you end up with? Did it work out well? Did you have any regrets?
Can I ask how many you had in the end? I have the same sort of dilemma and am exactly the same as you- I change my mind every 5 minutes!
I feel like a huge number will be a bit scary on the day, like I might be thinking that everyone is looking at me thinking I am trying to be all showy and a bit of an idiot. However, when I think about not having all my friends with me I feel a bit sad. :-( We are in a group and so it is hard to choose people over others.
How many did you end up with? Did it work out well? Did you have any regrets?
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| Lyndzo | 26 |
| beargoose | 21 |
| his chippymunk | 20 |
| Ms. Salamander | 18 |
| LammChop | 17 |
| fivemonthsnotice | 17 |
| kat2014 | 15 |
| mypinkshoes | 15 |
| aussiebee | 15 |
| pengoala | 14 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| LammChop | 11 |
| TwoCityBride | 3 |
| janetsnakehole | 3 |
| Mrs. Chai | 2 |
| ticklemepink | 2 |
| garden_bride | 2 |
| Ms. Salamander | 2 |
| Miss Root | 1 |
| SapphireSun | 1 |
| jimbert321 | 1 |
I'm just about a year away from my wedding. We have been engaged for 7 months, and I am still not decided on how many bridesmaids to have. Our evening wedding will have about 185-200 guests.
I consciously waited several months to ask anyone to be in my bridal party, because I didn't feel the need to rush and I have heard the horror stories of girls rushing into these big decisions out of excitement and regretting it later.
I started officially asking people a few months ago, and I currently have 5 bridesmaids: two best friends who will share the duty of MOH; my brother's wife (for whom I was her BM); and two female cousins (for both of whom I was also a BM). I have two more girlfriends that I would like to include, and I know I can't worry about what anyone else thinks ("seven is too many!" "I only had two bridesmaids and my wedding was bigger than yours!"), but I am still hesitant to make it official.
I have literally been back-and-forth over this dilemma for months. One day I'll say "five is plenty" but then I feel guilty that my other wonderful friends aren't included; another day I'll say "seven it is, who cares about a number!" but I still haven't been able to ask my last two 'maids. I am not worried about symmetry, so that's not even an issue, and my friends are pretty lowkey and have been in weddings before without any conflict, so I'm not even worried about anyone acting out or causing issues.
Everytime I see a photo of a bride with her 'maids, I now find myself counting how many there are, but I just can't seem to make up my damn mind!!!
So... how many bridesmaids did/do you have? Was anyone else as conflicted as I seem to be?