- 9 years ago
- Wedding: September 2009
I want to preface this by saying I have a wonderful relationship with my future parents-in-law. We might have very different taste at times but they are wonderful people and I’m lucky that I will soon be related to them. That said, I don’t know where we should draw the line.
The first headbutting was over the guest list, most of you have had this same arguement. My Future Mother-In-Law wanted to invite people that have never been on our radar. (Take for example, the ex-mayor, who is not even a family friend, or a neighbor that used to babysit my fiance 20 years ago and he hasn’t seen since – nor, I think, has his mother. Seriously? I’m sorry, but no. They will not be getting an invitation.) So that was an easy line to draw. (Easy decision, not easy to actually convince her.)
Then she started buying meat from Sam’s club as it went on sale (we’re more or less catering the dinner ourselves). That’s very sweet of her except that we don’t agree with Walmart’s business practices and avoid shopping there. Additionally, if our wedding has a theme it’s “local.” Sam’s doesn’t even come close. So we compromised. They’re hosting the reception and so they can do it however they want. Beef from Brazil or mass produced in a feedlot? Fine, you host it, you call the shots but the meat for the reception will be grass-fed and local.
Most recently one of their friends RSVPed. We enjoy hanging out with this couple and they have hosted many a Bronco party that we’ve attended. I was happy to see that they were coming until I read the names. Because the husband can’t come his wife is bringing her son, her ex-brother-in-law and (who I assume to be) his wife because they happen to live nearby my hometown where the wedding will be. ?!? So my fiance mentions to his mom that we’re not expecially thrilled about that. Actually, I believe he texted, “Awesome. :-(” but I’m not even going to go there. So then she sends back a text saying that she understands and that they will pay for the rehearsal dinner, as that is tradition, and that she would be happy to pick up the tab for dinner ingredients as well. He thinks she was just being nice and offering, no strings attached. I see it as if we accept that offer then we lose some room to “correct” RSVPs like the random ex-brother-in-law. And will still have the tents, tables, alcohol, etc. to cover.
Oh, and my parents are footing the bill and my dad is letting us take over his farm. While technically there’s no max number of guests allowed, we passed my, and my parents’, comfort zones a little while ago.
Then she asks if they can buy a keg of Coors Light for the wedding. I know this one is silly to fuss over but the straws on my back are adding up. We’re planning on buying beer from the local brewery. (Which is really, really good.) So I don’t really know what to think. On the one hand, I want all of our guests to be happy and comfortable and theoretically, you could call Coors “local” (made 220 miles away.) On the other, Palisade beer is good, they have a wheat beer that’s not too heavy and it’s made 2 miles (literally 2.0 miles) from the farm. Local is our entire theme. My dad is growing the veggies, we’ll buy the meat from someone within the valley and the wine will have been grown and bottled from within 10 miles of the farm.
Any suggestions on where to concede and where to stand our ground? Holy crap, that’s long! My apologies and congratulations to anyone who made it though all of that. I would love to hear some outside opinions.