(Closed) How many DIDNT propose to their BMS

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: How did you ask you girls to be BMs?
    Planned proposal with gift : (8 votes)
    8 %
    Simply asked : (98 votes)
    92 %
  • Post # 3
    877 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I just asked them straight up, because asking them in a cute card or with a gift just didn’t seem like “me”.

    Post # 4
    2588 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I just asked. Maid/Matron of Honor, I didn’t even have to ask, really…just mentioned in passing, like, “Oh, and of course you’ll be my MOH!” and she said she would. 🙂

    Post # 5
    3316 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I am actually quite wary of having unique cute proposals to BMs.  There is a huge disparity in what people expect of their BMs–from “just be there on the day” to “come with me to meet with vendors, help with DIY projects, throw me a bachelorette party and a shower, and be my DOC.”  If what you want is more than the minimum, talking it over with the prospective Bridesmaid or Best Man beforehand can save you a lot of grief later.

    When I called my daughter and asked her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, she actually asked me what the duties were.  And I respected that.  She lives the other side of the country from me, and is still a student.  Thus, she was being careful not to set me up for disappointment if what I wanted was more than what she could do.  When I explained that I wanted help only on the day of, she was thrilled to say yes.

    Post # 6
    2714 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Errrr I didn’t propose, but I sent them cards because they live out of state and I didn’t know when I’d see them again…..

    Post # 7
    510 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I called the girls…. I don’t see the use in going overboard…

    Post # 8
    101 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I was so excited I didn’t even think to do anything cute.  Just called them up on the phone!

    Post # 9
    2788 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    Plain old phone call here.  I never even heard of ‘proposing’ to the bridesmaids until I started wedding planning.

    Post # 10
    1810 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    Yea, I didn’t really ask either. The three girls in my wedding kind of just knew that they would be my MOH/BMs.

    Post # 11
    1418 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I didn’t have to ask at all – my three ladies just knew!

    Post # 12
    1819 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    I’m not engaged yet, but I think it would be nice to ask my potential BMs in a cute way. To me, it’s something fun, crafty and wedding related you can do before you’ve made any actual wedding plans for people who I know would appreciate it. A very pretty beginning to the wedding planning process, if you will. That being said, I’ve been a Bridesmaid or Best Man twice and once I was asked over the phone, and once in person, and it was special to me without a card or a gift, because I knew the sentiment was genuine. That’s all that matters, anything else is just fun!

    Post # 13
    1332 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2016

    Huh??? I’ve never heard of this before.  Interesting concept, but not for me.

    Post # 14
    5148 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I just asked. I have 2 bridesmaids, my Future Sister-In-Law I asked. My sister I basiclly just said “you’re my MOH!” and didn’t really ask per-say.

    Post # 15
    576 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    i had never heard of making a big to do before i asked mine.  i’m glad because i might have felt like i needed to.

    Post # 16
    2083 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I just asked all of them. I was super close with all of them and they all knew they would be in it anyway. It would have been nice to do it in a fancy way but I figured asking them to be in it was special enough in itself. I mean, I did get them two sets of gifts a piece throughout the process. Shower hostess gifts and bridesmaid gifts closer to the wedding.

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